Sad

[Madeline]

My son Alfonso was just picked up to leave tomorrow for boot camp in Great Lakes, Illinois. I am feeling very sad and left wondering if this was the best choice for him. I am very proud but also nervous and concern for him. There are so many questions and unknowns and I feel I have no one to turn to who will understand the emptiness that i am feeling right at this moment; my husband is outside going on with his day as normal he has not even come in to ask me how I am doing. Oh I feel like scream how could you just work on your car as if nothing is going on. I know and understand that everything is going to be alright but my heart is torn that is my baby.

[Kim B.]

Hi Diane,

My heart goes out to you! Your son will be okay and so will you. What you wrote vividly made me remember that first day that my son left. I was an emotional basket case and actually I did the same thing that you did. I signed on to Navy for Moms and I poured out my heart as the tears streamed down my face.

Boot camp is the hardest. It is a complete break. Someone comes and plucks your baby out of your home and you are left with an incredible void to fill. You did the right thing though...you reached out and here we are all at different stages of our journey.

This site was a life line for me while my son was in boot camp. Soon you will connect with other Mom's who are walking this path with you. I lived vicariously through all the Mom's whose son's PIR'd(Pass in Review aka bootcamp graduation)with my son. If someone got a letter, or a phone call it made me feel better. You learn a lot from the other Moms. Once they get through boot camp it gets easier.

My son is in Pensacola for A School. Do you know what your son will be doing? Keep in touch and let me know how you are making out. Check out my pics from the graduation and envison yourself there in just about two months. I hope you will be able to go to the graduation. It is really quite an experience! You will be sooo proud!!!

Kim

[Joline (Matt's Mom)]

Diane,

Today is my last day with Matt before taking him to the hotel tonight. Tomorow morning he is picked up, taken to MEPS for final processing and leaves for Great Lakes after that. I am dreading that final goodbye. I know this is a very good thing for him but I know exactly how you are feeling...nervous, anxious, concerned....so many overwhelming feelings.

I wonder if our sons will be processed together and meet. Keep in touch...we can support each other through this.

[Madeline]

Welcome Diane

Yes, he will be OK and you will become one proud mother of a US Navy Sailor; yes you will miss him everyday a great deal. You will learn that your son is a much stronger person then you ever imagined and you will get through it all. The US Navy is one of the greatest experiences that my son has ever had in his life and I am so proud of all of his accomplishments, courage, and strength and will to want to be part of the US Navy and he is very happy in the Navy. When my son left I cried all of the time, on the way to work, on the way home from work, in bed, while I was cooking; I cried all the way to boot camp graduation, and during the ceremony however my tears at graduation were of pride. During the eight weeks of boot camp I beat myself up with guilt because for some reason I blame myself for not stopping him; however I am so happy I did not stand in his way and I was strong enough to encourage him through it all.

The best advice I can give is do not beat yourself up; the US Navy is a great place to be and your son is in the best place he could be right now, everyone in the Navy looks out for each other so do not worry he will have alot of support. When you get his address write to him everyday, twice if you feel the need; he will appreciate every note, letter, card and word of encouragement from you. Also do not post anything that your son writes in his letters to you on this site, I made that mistake and my son was reprimanded on it. Your son is allow to invite four people to his graduation ceremony in your first letter provide him with the four person’s names who would be able to attend the ceremony and do not believe everything you read on this site you are not able to get more then four guest into the graduation ceremony so do not try.

You will see everything will be great for you and most especially your son.

[Madeline]

My son’s bedroom has become a place were I go to feel him a little closer to me; I have cleaned the room, repainted the room and now I am putting up all the many awards he received during high school in hopes of him coming home after A school for a short visit.
One more thing, try to prepare yourself for the arrival of the box which holds all of his personal belonging in which you last saw him in, it was one of the most difficult thing I have ever endured in my life; although I really do not know what to say to help ease the pain I experienced when I received the box.

[Laurie Heckler]

Wow, I just joined Navy for Moms today but came across your posting. Hope you are better and have adjusted a little. I"ll bet you can't wait to wrap your arms around him and smell him. I totally empathize with the emptiness - like there's a big hole in your chest. I know that dad's care too but there is nothing like a moms love for her baby. What is your son's job going to be??? Does he know yet?

My son went into boot camp in September, finished up A-School two weeks ago and is home on leave. I will be driving him to the airport next Wednesday morning for a flight to Japan to be stationed for three years. I know that next Thursday, I'll be a wreck. Even though he's home on leave, he's out a lot with his friends, I can still tell he's in the neighborhood.

I keep telling myself that this is the best thing that could have happened to him and that as a parent you are supposed to sacrifice for your kids - well, what I really want to do is lock him in his room and not let him out! I was ironing his shirts yesterday and thinking about how I wish I could go with him - sorry hubby, you're on your own, I"m movin to Japan!!!

Hope you're better and let us/me know how you're making out