SCARED!!!

[Char]

Hi everyone,

I have been reading a few post, especially the boot camp ones and the ones where people have been ganged up on and fighting. My son is not accustomed to that sort of thing. Fighting and bad roommates! What is going on? My son is somewhat bossy, but not a fighter (never had a fight in 19 years, except with his own brothers) and no trouble in high school. I'm worried for him, he leaves for boot camp in September but what is he headed into?

[Char]

Hi iinky!

thanks for your prayers, God honors our prayers. So far so good, he seems to be a lot happier!

[Denise Purdy]

Here's some good news.....the Navy is a bit more selective in the recruiting process. Therefore, there are fewer troublemakers in boot camp. Ten years ago when my son, Bryan, experienced boot camp, he told me that a couple of guys were sent home. Everyone else learned to work as a team of shipmates. Remember, all the recruits are coming from various backgrounds, and levels of maturity. And from what I've witnessed, the Navy is doing a mighty fine job of turning out mature and knowledgable sailors. Wait until you hear that Navy creed at the graduation. It'll make you swell with pride!! God bless your son, and you too, mom

[JCNavyMOM]

When my son went to boot camp - Oct 2007 - the worst thing that happened to him was his DS yelled at him......he got sick and he had his wisdom teeth pulled.......there was no fighting - in fact they foster teamwork, it takes the whole group to pass or fail certain trials......they don't really have "roomates" they sleep in a big open room full of bunks (think summer camp) - its work, and its stressful but write him lots of letters, let him know your there supporting him and he will come out of it a better man :)

[Mary]

Char, my son is kinda nerdy and so far, he's been OK. He said basic was the hardest thing he's ever done and was very proud he accomplished basic. It is learning by rote, mainly, but, if he learns fast not to question orders & is in good physical condition, he should do just fine & get thru it with minor blood letting. ;-)

If you need to talk, let me know. I've been a Navy mom for 3 1/2 years now!
Good luck!
Mary

[Viki]

Just tell him to keep his nose clean and mind his own business
Lots of kids out of high school is the problem

[Char]

Hi Vicki,

Thanks for your reply. Unfortunately, my son went UA for ten days, out of fear. Now he's waiting for his punishment. Its been hard, he is very bored. Nothing to do and he came home....He went back on his own but he just says he has nothing to do all day.

[Viki]

I would not worry, Navy is way different from bullies in the neighborhood
There is no time for B S anyway and they will be scared to get in trouble

[miriqui]

My son left Aug 4th to Great Lakes... he will be graduating soon... I was scared too... He loves it and has made lots of friends... there is nothing going on out of the ordinary... he says they all get along and cant wait for graduation... My sailor is very christian and the church here always prays for the boys and girls there.... put him in the hands of God he will be fine,,,
Myriam

[Char]

Myriam:

Thanks for your encouraging words. My son is in Pensacola. He needs much much prayers. Please pray for him, please. Thank you.

[BethB]

Char - I hear you aboutyour concerns. I too was worried when my son left for boot camp, but my fears were more about his personal reaction to the yelling and potential demeaning nature of commands. Long personal story, but I had legit concerns about his reactions. My son is also an easy-going well-liked kind of guy brought up in a small town and church. I am fortunate that there a several military family and friends (no Navy though) who talked to my son before his departure about what to expect and how to survive Boot Camp. Basically, do what you are told, keep your mouth shut, and if possible, join a gym and be in good physical shape before going in. As long as you can keep up, and follow orders, you will not be a target. Of course, that Black Wall of Silence for the 8 weeks in Boot Camp is very difficult for a mom - and I had a wealth of support on this site, and have made life-long friends with the moms that had sons in the same division as my son. Here's my take on things after Boot Camp where I asked my son specifically about my concerns and how he saw things:
Boot Camp PT - Physical Training - He was in really good shape before he left, and it paid off, but it was still hard. However, he really gets into working out, can't wait to hit the gym, and is proud that he is in the best physical condition he's in.
Fighting and retaliation - I had heard in his letters that there were some rather stubborn individuals (I think he called them knuckleheads) that did not have the self discipline and made comments or other actions that caused the whole group to pay the price (as in extra PT, etc) for that transgression. I asked, and he said that never, never was there any instances where anyone was ganged up on - there just isn't the time or energy worth it, and everyone is correct, the RDC's keep a close watch on things.
RDC yelling - he was fortunate and was never singled out, probably due a lot to his personality and his preparedness. However, as much as I was concerned about this, he walked away from Boot Camp with the highest regard for the RDC's. After all, they have to be the best of the best to have that position. They are not paid to be nice or to babysit. When our guys are placed in an active duty situation and the stuff starts to hit the fan, they have to all pull together and focus on the big picture or lives can be lost. Big responsibilities for young guys, and no room for attitude.
Fun and Games - yes, they actually happened, believe it or not. I'm not telling tales, but they were able to have good-natured fun with each other. Also, there are competitions between the divisions that really promote teamwork and pride.
Friendships - Even though some of his Boot Camp shipmates are long gone to other assignments, they still remain in contact. He has the honor of being named as the godfather of one of his BC buddies. Remember - these guys will be away from home for long stretches of time, during holidays, etc. and they will all stick together because they are each other's "family" and support system now. My son has been to several of his Navy buddies' homes fore Easter and Thanksgiving dinners, etc. He brought his roommate home for a few days and my home is always open to anyone he wants to bring along!
Respect and appreciation - I guess one of my pet peeves is the discrimination that goes along between enlisted vs officers - seen it from both sides. That's just the liberal in me, and I fully understand the necessity of it (after all, everyone has a boss of some kind) but I don't like the way it can sometimes spill over into the private life. I had to learn to keep my mouth shut when he was terribly impressed that an officer actually talked to him and shook his hand (after all, as Americans no one of us is better than the other) but at least I know that my son knows to appreciate and respect the responsibilities and experiences of those guys. That, plus it depends on the quality of the person. You will have jerks in any walk of life, and that's just a fact - so you just deal with it.
Having been from a small town, he was surprised at the diversity of his shipmates, and has probably learned a lot about the way of life outside his comfort xone. Some of his friends had the option of joining the navy or joining a gang - totally not from the world he grew up in. It taught him the appreciation of his home and life, and respect for those who had the courage to make something of themselves.
Long and rambling comment, I know, but you and your son will be fine. It's a difficult thing, but it is one that you and your son will be proud of. Also remember - Boot Camp is only 8 weeks - then it gets so much better for both. Hang in there, and definitely make use of this tremendous support system on this web site. I certainly appreciate everyone here who has helped me along the way.
And from one navy Mom to another: I'm thankful for your son's choice to serve, and for the sacrifices that all of our soldiers and sailors and their families - even more now!

[Char]

Hi Beth,

Thanks for your encouraging words. My son is not in the Navy anymore...he's home, working and going to school Thanks.