He's leaving- tomorrow!

[Cindy Proud Navy Mom of Rob]

This is the deal -Rob was supposed to go to BC January 22, 2008. He was set up to go as a CS but, was hoping to get accepted in to an aviation position before that happened. The recruiters stopped by my work this morning wanting to get ahold of him. They had a kid that was supposed to leave for BC today but, didn't (I don't know why) and so they have a 'seat' available for Rob.
I don't know what to tell him. Hold out for what he thinks he wants or just get this life started? Thing is he told us he just wants to go, is ready, and honestly we want him to before his spontaneous & impulsive behavior gets him into a situation that will throw a wrench in to it and cause problems.
He called and said he wasn't sure what to do. He's scared a bit -now that it faces him. Truth be told - so am I.
I just told him I want him to be happy plus I didn't want him to say later, even a day from now ' I should have gone'.
This is so hard. I am sure he is just not really ready for BC. Are most of them ever really ready for the ubknown?January would have given him more time to get used to the idea plus learn more. I just feel he is ill-prepared at this point. Typical Mom I guess - worry wart. I had geared myself for January -having him home for the holidays one last time before God knows when. He's the last one to go and we really are very close.
I do not want to be weak and hold him back and be selfish though.
What to do -tell him to go if he has this window of opportunity or wait until he finds out for sure if he qualifies for the aviation position that he prefers?
I just don't want him to regret the choice he makes right now - it's a big one.
What would you parents do if it was your kid?

[Cindy Proud Navy Mom of Rob]

FALSE ALARM! Rob just called and said they can't do it now. Typical men -playing with our emotions. Who does that? Shouldn't they have been sure BEFORE they put us through this? What a roller coaster! Sorry to unload all - next time I'll wait until it's a sure thing -just thought it was. Lesson learned.

[Jamie]

Tell him to go. our son is in A school now he PIR'D (parade in review) on 9-5-08 it was exciting now he is in A school in Meridian Miss. and loves it he is an AZAR(Aviation mechanic administration). He wanted to fly the planes but found out he was color blind for red and blue. yes it will be hard the first 3 weeks but it does get better. and the first 8 weeks flies by fast. and we are all here to comfort other moms..

[Brenda Sue]

Make him stay!!! Too quick a decision!! He needs to be here for the holidays - one last time!!! After this, you don't know when he will EVER be home for the holidays.
More importantly, I would be concerned about him not getting the job he wants. I would be sure he could get the job he wants before he goes in!! Remember, this is what he is going to do everyday for the next several years. He had better enjoy it and not just settle.
Only you know your kid - and if he NEEDS to go now or not!! I definitely would not want him to jeopardize his chances of enrolling if you think that might be possible.

[Brenda Sue]

hahaha - go, stay, go, stay ???????????????

[Molly mom of 2 + 330,701 sailors]

Wait for what he wants ~ January is just around the corner and he doesn't just want to take whatever comes his way just to go sooner ! But that is just my opinion !

[Susan, Collin's mom]

Cindy, They did the same thing with our son. He was set up to leave around thanksgiving and called at least twice with offers for him to leave early. What i was told was they find out when there is an opening and they try to get a recruit into that leave date but so does every other recruiter. It's whoever gets their recruit in first. We encouraged our son to leave early. He's a good kid but has this lable on his forehead that says " stop me i'm doing something i'm not supposed to be doing". So he left early. pir is this fri. Even though he was in dep for 7 months, he was still scared when it came time. Venturing into the unknown i guess. His first two weeks were hard but then things got better and he's doing good now. There's nothing wrong with waiting until his date, especially if he's waiting for a job. If he doesn't get into that job when he leaves, he can still put in for aviation afterwards. He may get turned down first time but if he's respectfully persistant with the request to change jobs, he will eventually get it. Hope this helped. Susan

[carols_kitchen]

like the forehead quote--think it is pretty common if the men are kind of just floating in the wind.

[Sheryl from Ca (Tommy's Mom)]

Thank goodness it was a false alarm….now you both have some time to sit back and think and plan what to do if it happens again!
If he was my son, I would tell him to hold out for what he really wants. The military is hard enough, but if he is stuck doing a job he is not really interested in, it is twice as hard!!!

So I would tell him if an aviation seat comes open, grab it and go….if not, then wait for it…..in the mean time he should get a copy of the PFT requirements and get a head start, getting ready for boot camp and study his DEP book.
I have two sons in the Military right now. My younger son was set to leave for boot camp in August and was called the last week of April, he left May 6th. So I know how you feel….
Good luck to both of you…..:o) it is a wonderful experience!!

[Cindy Proud Navy Mom of Rob]

Thanks ladies. I was a wee bit frantic because it was so sudden. It was one of those 'moments in time'. Standing on the brink - scared and unsure. The answer was given. We will be better prepared next time. Hopefully more ready. No longer will certain things be put on a back burner. You just never know.

[Oldswabbie]

You gotta let go Mom. I know you were setting and preparing for January, but in the Navy its always about changes and changing. If he can get the school he wants - Let him go. If he's already made the "Navy Decision" then he needs to do what he feels HE needs to do. Just support him whatever he decides to do, thats what he's going to be looking for. You will be fine Mom... so will he. I know its a scary time for both of you.. I've been there as that young boy (17) getting on the bus to Boot Camp. But we all have to do it... Give them a boy, they'll give you back a Man.

OH - see where you said they cant do it. Now that they done it.. It CAN happen again.. be prepared!

Jim

[Sheila]

Great reply Oldswabbie. My son 's PIR was in May. The Navy "way" is always about change and what they need at the moment...not what is wanted or convenient for the sailor. They have a tough job, but aren't we proud!

[carols_kitchen]

We were the opposite. DEP date of Nov. 13th, but would take an earlier opportunity. I took our sailor to my Mom's nursing home over Mother's Day weekend. Guess what, we got the call that Sunday. We still had some time, as his report date was moved up to June 16th. So not as drastic as your situation.
Once he got to boot camp, half way through, the gave him another opportunity for job change. Instead of carrier, he will be training for submarine.
He is having the time of his life--studying his rear end off, but also enjoying his Saturdays at A school. So, for him it was good to take an earlier date. He didn't have time to, so to say, sit around and mope.
The holidays will still be there, whenever we take them. Ask the recruiter what A school your recruit would report to, and see if they will be on stand down for Christmas.
Best wishes