Going to the recruiter with my son?

[MissUAlready]

I scheduled the 1st meeting with the recruiter on behalf of my 17 yo son. I thought because he is a minor I would have to be there; and because I am his mom I WANT to be there. He can be somewhat niave and I don't want him to get persuaded.

I was speaking with someone about the appointment and they asked if I should go with him or if that would make him look like a baby. My first reaction what...wut? This person can be VERY opinionated and backwards with this stuff...but I thought I would throw it out there because I have been accused of "babying" my son too much.

Did you go with your child to the recruiter meeting?
Thanks in advance for your thoughts and suggestions.
Stacey

[MissUAlready]

Thank you. I agree. I have always been very active in my son's life...he'll have 8weeks+ to live without me.
I think I would regret not being there if he needed me. It will be easier for me to go sit in another room and wait than to not be there and he needs me.

Thanks for your input as well. I hope everything is going well for your son/soldier and he is happy.

Sincerely,
Stacey

[LM Coil]

Stacey-
my son is just starting his paper work. He asked my husband and I to be there. the recuirter wqas kind and let us ask questions. I think it helped our son to hear our Q&A's. He was then able to form some questions he had. My son is my oldest and just graduated from high school the night before he first went to the Navy recuiter. WE (all 3) sat there and talked.My son informed them that his uncle had advised him to shop the military branches adn don't settle 'cause the prior/current family is in one branch. My son went back two days later and stated his paper work for the Navy. It was at that meeting that my hubby found out he wanted Active not reserves (which is where my hubby would like him to go). I'm proud of my son and he will be gone for a priior engagement for about 6 weeks with his scout obligation. It will give him much quiet time to decide if this is where an what HE wants. Bottom line is it's his life. I have raise d him with morals and standards that I pray he takes with him. He is one to follow thru with his choices. He is a very active young man, with sports, scouting (Eagle) and community. He is will succeed.

And I found this site by chance and I'm so thanksful for it. I spent most of this weekend reading lots of posts. It helped me not feel alont on thie venture in my sons life.

[Sharon]

I would agree with this as well. My son and I had many discussions before he even made the appointment to speak to the recruiter and I went with him and was very involved with everything. At every juncture though I asked my son what he wanted me to do and every step of the way he wanted me there. Now he has graduated basic training and made honor graduate for his "A" school and is home on leave for two weeks. What an amazing transformation it has been. Now I have asked him if we wants to me fly out to Norfolk with him to his perminant station and he said no. Growth is a good thing, and support along the way is always appreciated and helpful. Good luck!!

[Dawn Russell]

Go with your son!! You may have questions you want answered, and may think of something your son forgot. Both of my children joined last summer. I went with my son (a minor) every time. My daughter was 19 and she wanted me there. The recruiter (OK, I have to admit, these are the best recruiters! No lies, no half truths...they are great) said they want the parents there. They want not just the recruit happy, but the family as well. They are not trying to get someone to enlist for 4 years, but for a career. They want to be sure your child is happy with the decision. Also, since he is a minor, you must sign for him to join.

[genia joseph]

Our son began the process with the Navy at 17 also. I never hesitated to meet the recruiter. As a matter of fact, my husband and I met him at the local cafe for coffee more than once. I told the recruiter right away that I was not going to sign any paperwork, but that I was extremely proud of my son for choosing the military. We spoke with the recruiter on the phone, he came to our home when it was time for our son to sign the final paperwork---the day AFTER his 18th birthday-- and when our son went into DEPS for 9 months, the recruiter was kind enough to escort me from my motel to the MEPS center, and even bought my younger daughter lunch while we waited through that long process. I never felt that the Navy thought I was babying him. They treated me with the utmost respect at all times, and made sure I understood every single thing my son was signing, even after he turned 18. He is now in the Nuclear Program in South Carolina and doing FANTASTIC. He is strong, self disciplined, and gaining respect from the officers there. I would never change the way we worked with the Navy. I felt as if I had created this wonderful man for them and the least they could do was reasure me that they would treat him well when I handed him over lock stock and barrel. So...go with what you feel is right. If you want to be in on the decisions, go with him to speak with the recruiter. The Navy is very understanding about MOMS.

[Brandonsmom]

Stacey,
I went with my son to the Marines and the Navy offices for the first time and he decided on the Navy because his grandfathers were in the Navy. After we talked to the recruiter for a while, we made an appointment for him to come to the house to meet his father and grandfathers. I think my son wanted all of our opinions and approvals before he signed up. My son was also 17 when he signed up so when I went with him I wanted to make sure he didn't sign anything before I saw everything first. I wouldn't think of it as "babying" him.
Sherri

[Maggie Rice]

My son was also 17 when he enlisted. While I didn't go with him to the appointment, I knew what he wanted to do in the Navy so I wasn't too worried. The recruiter came to our house with all the paperwork for me to sign and I felt pretty comfortable about it. That was 12 years ago.

After 10 years of working on various kinds of jets, going to sea 3 times - and to war once - he is now on shor duty. Actually, my son is now a recruiter - in Frederick, MD - and he tells me that the Navy no longer allows recruiters to make wild promises that they can't deliver just to get someone signed up. In fact, he says the Navy is really in pretty good shape with new enlistees. They are not going to offer jobs that they can't deliver on.

My suggestion is to sit tight. The recruiter will have to get in touch with you to sign lots of papers. Good luck to both of you.

[Renee]

I went with my oldest so when he joined at 17 and gonna go with the youngest in about 6 months they never said anything to me

[MissUAlready]

Your responses are wonderful! Thank you so much!

[Valerie]

I went with my son to the recruiter after he asked me to. Being a vet, I wanted to hear what the recruiter had to say. I must say, I was very impressed with them. They treated me as if what I had to say was important and always made me feel as if they were not just interested in my son, but in me also. They were happy that I was there and was concerned enough for my son to make sure everything was above board. They even told me where I could verify everything they said. Though my son is mature enough, he is still my son and I wanted what was best for him (as we all do). I would do it all over again the exact same way. You are not "babying" your son, you are looking out for his best interests. Good luck.

Valerie

[stephsmom]

My daughter was 21 when she joined (DEP- waiting on opening in her rating). My husband or I went to every meeting they had. The recruiters were really cool about it. They said you're going to keep us on our toes Mrs.__________! They came to our house many times. We learned a lot more this way and felt very comfortable sending her to another city with them for physicals, etc...She never told us she didn't want us there and in fact some of the other Deppers would always come over and tell us about why they were joining. We had all the cell phones of the recruiters in the office. I think if he doesn't care and you want to, go with him. Would you go with him to check on a college?

[MissUAlready]

Good point!