How to tell mommy.

[Kayla (Blake's fiance) Div. 939]

My name is Chris and i'm going into the navy in june...i report for bc that is. I've been running into some confusion with my parents though. Right now my job is ABH which is "aviation boatswains mate handling" which I literally chose for the fun of it. I am aware that a lot of people chose the military to get ahead in life which i did. But I mostly chose it to see great things and do fun things. It might sound childish but to me I'm young and I want the experience of the World. Well later in life I want to be a police officer but I would also like to be a firefighter and my parents want me to change my job to an MA, which is master at arms(military police). I was interested in it for a while but I changed my mind because I wanted that sea carrier experience with a family as close as the airwing guys. My parents don't know that I've already canceled my switch over for MA so I could stay at ABH and they keep telling me to bug my recruiter about it. My mom is more for the MA job than I am. I just want her to be proud of my decision and support me. I can't stand it when my mom is dissapointed in me. It stresses me out and makes me feel like the most horrible person even if I dont show that to her. I want her to see the good and respect in the ABH job. What should I do?

[LiferMom]

What a beautifully said reply Joyce!

[Sn Thomas]

every job is respected in the navy even the undesignated seamen roles are iimportant its all about what u want to do ive been in for 1 year and im switching from corpsmen to some kind of aviation im a reservists get back at me if u want advice

[Carmen]

Hi Chris! My name is Carmen. I understand how you feel about pleasing your parents and I understand your mom for thinking of giving you the best. I have a son in the Navy. He's been in the Navy for 3 years. Like you, he wanted to travel and get an eduction at the same time and the Navy is the best of both to do. Tell your mom about your decision and if its not what you wanted, you can always go back to MA. My son has experienced several jobs through the Navy like, working with Jets and he tried the submarine thing but did not like it at all. Now he is a MA3. He just came from Bahrain and lived there for a year and they put him in Harbor Patrol Home Security. He loved it! He was just home from leave and now he is in Greece hoping to land the same orders. I cant tell you how proud I am of him. Yes, I am scared but I have to trust him in his decision. That is something your mom has to learn to do. She has to understand that the job you decide will affect you for life. Give her time Chris. She will be sad but i'm telling you, the day you graduate, all you will see are tears of joy and proudness in her eyes. Good Luck and if she wishes to contact me, please feel free. Good Luck and dont take it so hard. You need a clear head.

[Tere/Matt's Mom]

Carmen....I would like to send you a friend request....but there are quite a few carmens! Our son being in the same field, well I could use someone to talk to.

[Tere/Matt's Mom]

Chris, my son is in A school for MA's. He tells me what is involved in this training. Between Carmen and I you might get some idea of what to expect, but I agree with both Joyce and Carmen. Boot camp is life changing. Your mom will see a changed man and you will be proud of what you have achieved.

All jobs are serving this country with honor and pride. All jobs are needful. MA is not military police like other branches. It is now changed due to the attack on USS Cole and 911. The MA's going through training now are trained as Special Forces. Carmen's son is a very trained and highly respected young man. He has been through what you might consider 2 bootcamps due to the extreme training. This is not to say it is not what you want...it is to say that Mom needs to learn what it is to be an MA in today's Navy. It is your job to help educate her, but understand, Moms do go through a major adjustment as well. That's putting it lightly.

Chris, Listen to what Carmen and Joyce have said. It's good advice.

If you need to talk, please look me up.
~Tere

[Kayla (Blake's fiance) Div. 939]

Thanks for all the advice everyone.

[dawn katte]

I respect the courage it took for you to do what you are really passionate about. You are very articulate in telling all of us Mom's your reasons for wanting to remain ABH, do your parents a favor and share with them the same way you shared with us. They really want what is best for you long term and as a Mom I can tell you that sometimes my dreams for my son get in the way of his. Ask them to trust and SUPPORT you. Tell your mom you NEED her support and tell her what it does to you when you don't get it. Good luck and thank you for serving.

[Sheryl]

Just be open and honest to your mom, all us mom's really want is for you to be happy

[Michelle (Ethan's Mom)]

Chris,
Can your recruiter meet with your parents? Maybe he/she can give them the information they are looking for. I was anxious about my son's decision to go in, but the change I've seen in him through bootcamp on the day of his PIR more
than calmed my fears about him knowing what he was doing. He went in a child, and came out a man...I still "hover" a bit, but not about his decisions and the direction he has chosen for his life. Tell your parents about this site. They can find answers to questions, and support to help them understand what's going on.

[Laura]

Hopefully by the time you get this you have talked to your parents. As a mom I am always proud of my son. I think that it is important to enjoy any job that you do. There will be times that you are not ahppy with your job but if you are most of the time you mom will be very proud of you. You might try and show he waht you wrote. It will give you a starting point. Good luck with this and your Navy career.

[Elizabeth]

Chris,
Best of luck in your future ventures with the Navy. As for your choice, it it that, your choice. I couldn't get my son to go into a welding program and he's a master welder. He chose to go into ABF (fueling). I don't know why, but it was his choice and I back him up 100%. I know you don't want to hurt your mom, but you have to do what feels right for you. Your mom will support you as I did. My son is presently in P'cola in A school for ABF and graduates end of February. Good luck.

[Samantha]

Chris do whatever ever YOU want to do. Your mom is a mom, and that means no matter what she is going to be proud of you! Good luck!