Soon to be a Navy Mom

[Rachel]

My 22 year old son has made the decision to join the Navy. Gene, his dad and I will be meeting with a recruiter very soon. Can anyone give us some insight on how this meeting will proceed? And, what are some questions we should be prepared to ask? I'm not happy about my son enlisting but of course this is his choice I will support him all the way. I just want to make sure this is a wise decision.

[Ordy]

Hello Rachel

Obviously the first thing your son/daughter needs to do is find a rating (Type of Job he/she will train for and perform) within the Navy that best suits him/her. The one thing to always remember is for him/her to make sure whatever rating they choose, it is something he/she will be able to apply on the outside. Should he/she decide to end their military career when their time is up and become a civilian; that choice will benefit them greatly! Please look at this opportunity like their going to college, in essence they are.

Any Navy Recruiter has a job to do. They have come home, still on active duty and their job is solely to put some butts in some seats. They are charged with filling certain billets as per the needs of the U.S. Navy. Unfortunately some of these Recruiters are pretty slick and tend to look more at the interests of the Navy and not that of the individual. They look at that individual; and based upon their test scores and other criteria; guide them toward their needs, not the needs of that future Sailor. I know first hand.

Whatever you do, make sure you Get It In Writing! Also make sure that “In Writing” you have it spelled out what will happen to this new Sailor should they should not pass “A” School; or the type of Discharge they will receive should they get hurt in Boot Camp and not able to continue their obligation. An Honorable or Medical Discharge goes a long way. General, (OTH) Other Than Honorable, don’t work well on the outside with employers. (BCD) Bad Conduct and Dishonorable Discharges can ruin a person. I wouldn’t worry about (BCD or Dishonorable) discharges, as you pretty much have to earn those.

When you take this approach, you will get resistance from the Recruiter, but stay the course. It might even take a month or two, but I assure you they will be calling you back. Believe it or not, you can even go to an attorney and have them draft up something to take in with you. That document may be signed by both you and the Recruiter, and placed within their personnel record as an agreement between the parties. Also, you can negotiate what rank they will assume once they get out of Boot Camp. Most often they go in as E1 and upon successful completion of Boot, may obtain E3. This too has a positive financial impact on this Sailor starting salary and is negotiable.

Fields such as Engineering, Electronics, Nuclear, and especially that of Turbine and Boiler are going to be in huge demand within the next 5 years. The Utility Industry will greatly need those folks and the pay and benefits are outstanding. The current work force of Baby Boomers retiring will dramatically impact the U. S. work force within the next five years. With those folks retiring, some companies may see reductions of up to and possibly greater than 50%. Those positions will need to be back filled.

I hope this helps. If you need to chat more, please let me know.

Respectfully,
Ordy

[glenda]

Don't trust the recruiter and everything he/she tells you. all they (or some anyway) care about is making points by getting someone to join. Ask lots of questions and go beyond the recruiter for answers. I believe in a person joining the Navy but you have to watch out for nondisclosures or incomplete disclosures. I know all of this first hand. The recruiter made a lot of promises he did not keep and when approached just said he had to be out of town and was busy. he wasn't there for my son. he said they would assist him with physical training and it was a lie. he never showed up, he didn't meet with my son face to face every week like he said he would. he didn't follow through on anything except dropping my son off at the hotel to be shipped out to boot camp and left him outside the hotel alone with the doors locked for over an hour.
Now 10 days later my son is having problems, and I know it's not his fault. Just have to hope for the best.

When he took the "physical fitness test" my son said that the recruiter simply wrote that he passed and my son had real doubts that he actually passed. The recruiter said he would get him ready psycholocially (entering the navy mind set) and he did nothing but let my son down. By the way, my son will also be 22 soon.

I know all recruiters aren't bad. just be really careful, ask lots of questions and like I said ask his commander, etc. and make sure that your son gets treated right and is told up front about EVERYTHING. E\specially the contract. My son almost got screwed up with that too. the recruiter didn't even fill it out right and my son had signed it 6 months before departure date. the MEPS had to go over it again and fix it and had my son sign it again. I didn't get to see that copy because at MEPS they keep all the family/friends away from that process.

Anyway, I do have other relatives that joined the Navy and was told the same thing. Be careful especially with the contracgt and promises that they make.

Good luck and God Bless.

[Laura Person]

Shane,

Being a recruitor is not an easy job, thank you for your service and all your hard work.

Merry Christmas to you and your family. Hope you get some time off during the holidays.

Proud Navy Mom

[Nancy Jean]

My son "shopped" around and found a recruiter he liked. I researched the navy and the jobs he was interested in to get some background. Many (maybe most) recruiters are truthful. But let them know that you have researched some things and be upfront that you would like them to be honest in their statements.

We were extremely happy with our recruiter. Derrick learned so much from him but he was also in DEP for 9 mths prior to BC so that helped.

Congrats to you and your family. Remember ... when he goes to BootCamp, it's your bootcamp also! It's a tough time waiting and things change on the drop of a dime. That's preparation for the future because the Navy does what they want to do and when they want to do it! It's a wonderful career ... or a wonderful starting point for those that choose to serve for one or two tours and then go elsewhere.

Nancy Jean

[JD's Mom]

I went through this not too long ago and my son's recruiter was great. The meeting will proceed at the pace that you want. I asked about the enlistment time required, health benefits, what goes on during bootcamp, how long it was and where it was located. I asked about contact with my son. I also asked about life insurance for him, I know that isn't something that most people want to discuss, but you have to remember at my son's age 18 and your son's age 22 that don't usually think about those things and you want to make sure that they have this in place if something should, God forbid, happen to them and they have a family. My son is not a very good swimmer either so I had concerns about that, but they do teach them if needed. I also asked about the requirements to get through bootcamp. I wasn't sure about things I should ask either, but when I sat down with the recruiter, and he spoke about the different things that the Navy had to offer to my son the questions came to mind and he was a very patient man and answered everything. I hope this helps. My son ships out to bootcamp September 25, 2009. And I am very proud of the decision he has made.

[Staria Gager]

I invited my 17 year old's DEP recruiter to come over to meet with me. I told him I was cooking liver for dinner...HIS. Not the best way to start. Make sure that your child is being offered a rank that will give him a future outside of the Navy. As much
as I doubted my sons decision, turns out I was wrong. My son has traveled the world, made life long friends and has a work
ethic that I couldn't have taught him. He is now 24 yrs. old and stationed in Stuttgart Germany. Recently became Petty Officer First Class. I now encourage him to stay for retirement. These kids are some of the best, and brightest that our country has to offer. GL has a website that will keep you informed on what your recruit is doing. Good luck, and don't cry until after you drop him off. Please know that he will be well taken care of in Boot Camp.

[Dixie Banner]

I would not worry but I would ask questions...When my son enlisted he was fairly informed for his dad, as well as, I were in so he had an idea what to expect. However, I did speak with the recruiter to seek an update for I knew well there were some changes since I discharged. From what I hear they are more family friendly and are why many of us parted our ways.
Prior to his enlistment we watched the Carrier series on PBS and it was a hoot for I could provide him insight and what he would be experiencing. I would also suggest find families close to home who have sons who have been or are home for the holidays to visit with him, then they can hear the real story what it is like out in the fleet. Although, there is not much other than start making a list of all the things he likes and needs for when you begin working on his care packages. Yes, mail is important and mail call is the best part of the day. I created a myspace, page so we can communicate for I know I will catch him while he is chatting with his friends. Also, I set up an alotment, which he matches so he will have a fund for school when he is out....Hope this will give you a few ideas....

[Holli mom of Aaron R.]

Good morning Rachel. I have just read all the comments from other moms and wanted to add my two cents worth. First take a deep breath a relax. No matter what you and your husband say it is importnant to remember that this is your son's decision. No matter how you both feel be there for your son. Make sure that he has sat down and seriously thought about joining. This is a contract, not a job at McDonalds that he can easily walk away from.
My husband joined the Navy right after he turned 17 and proudly served for 21 years. My son's Pass-in-Review (graduation) is Christmas Eve! I could not be prouder of him. When he approached us, both my husband and I sat him down and talked with him. We asked a lot of difficult questions for a then 19 year old.We wanted to make sure that he did not feel like he had to join ( though with today's economy it was a very wise choice) Such as where do you see yourself in five years, ten etc? We made sure that he understood that this was a serious commitment. We talked about what field or rate he was interested in. Is the rate he wanted something that could transfer to a job in the civilian world if he decided not to make a career of the Navy? We were lucky because we were Navy. We knew all the tricks of the recruiters, remember they have a job to do too. When you and your husband meet with the recruiter be honest about your feelings. If you have a bad vibe about this particular recruiter ask to speak to someone else. My best advice is to listen. Listen to the recruiters, the other mothers here but mostly listen to your son. You raised him right and he will be smart and make a good decision. Good luck and Happy Holidays!

[Lee]

Make sure you read carefully the papers that your new recruit will sign. My son thought he was signing up as full time career. And there was a mix up and now he is a reservist. He is extremely unhappy about that.

[Sn Thomas]

seamen thomas here reservists in louisiana hometown do not rush this process i know ur son maybe eager to serve his country and get down to business but take it slow be sure he reads everything before signing and do loads of research on what his rate (job) is gnna be cause a recruiter has certain spots he has to fill in a months time so he will try to ease on a certain rate keep strong on what he wants ans stick with it

[Jean Anne]

After you have the ASVAB scores I would do some general ratings research on the internet before meeting with the recruiter. I would also recommend do some research on the overall educational, medical and housing benefits not to mention looking at the pay scale. Your son should decide if he is interested in trying a 4 or 6 year commitment of time that will help drive him towards a desired rating.

Merry Christmas - Jean Anne

[Sandy]

Happy new year ,,first of all,,,i know im gonna get some feedback,,but here goes...My son has been in 8 yrs now,and he is making it a career.lots of ups and downs thru out the yrs but.family and friends will get him thru everything ,,i mean ev erything that could be thrown at them..,at boot camp,at the first base,on deploy,ment.then he was a recruiter for 2 yrs,then another deployment last christmas and he just got a promotion, now he is being on land for 2 yrs,,luckily right whjer he lives in virginina beach. so,,.i was not happy either,,,I threw a fry pan at the recruiter,, and said get get out of my house.yu know good,,so so...my son had already signed the papers..it was al set...just had to prepare myself for his leaving..and so ask away all kinds of questions,,it has made my son a very important young man with a great future..and we are oh,so proud of him and all he does for his country...so,ill stop for now or i could write a book...dont want to do that...so have a great new year.....Sandy,,,,sorry if i got off track..but all recruiters are not all badd either.....