Communication on Carrier Deployments

[Alex]

Hey guys! My name is Alexandria but feel free to call me Alex. Basically, my boyfriend just found out he’s probably going to be deployed to a carrier in August. On the bright side, he comes home for a week in July before he goes. On the not-so-bright side, I don’t do well with missing people. Bootcamp was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. The day he left, we were alone together, and he put his head on my lap and I looked down at him and I realized at that moment that I had fallen in love with one of my best friends. I was terrified and upset because I felt that as soon as I figured out my feelings, he was going to be sent half a continent away. Fortunately, we kept in contact through letters, which i sent MAAANNYYY of, and a month after he left bootcamp for A school, I told him how I felt and now, we’re together. Anyway, back on topic, he just told me that he will most likely be sent to a carrier in August. I heard he won’t be able to use his phone, or get mail that often. But what’s the email situation? What is port? I heard they can skype and stuff when they’ve reached port, but i’m not sure what it means. Does anyone else have a story about carrier deployment, or any tips on getting through it? 

Much love, Alex. 

[Anti M]

A port is where a ship stops and sailors can go ashore (to land).  Port visits are usually a few days, but not all sailors get to go on liberty every day in port.  Homeport is where the ship is stationed and where they will be when not deployed.

You sailor will be given a .mil address to use for shipboard emails.  These are used on the ship's computers, not on personal devices.  Because the computers are shared, there may be lines to use them, and your sailor may not have the time to email daily.  Also, the emails are screened for trigger words, so nothing too terrible or sexy or which violates OPSEC gets through.  Keep it clean and on the lighter side. Even if he doesn't have time to reply, he may have time to read his emails, so keep sending them.  

Snail mail is actually not bad, although it can take time, letters are priceless.  Letters get through better than care packages, and a carrier gets more mail because it gets more air traffic.

When they are in port, when the ship stops at shore, they may be able to find wifi to make calls or skype.  He will learn what phone plan to use, as keeping a US phone may result in excessive roaming charges if he is not very, very careful.  

Now and then the ships will go into "River City" which is short for Restricted Communications.  The ship cuts off all in and outgoing communications for security reasons, with no notice.  It isn't you, it isn't him, it is the Navy.  Expect unexpected blackouts.

See if he can get you on the ombudsman list.  An ombudsman is a trained spouse who puts out official information from the ship, lends support, and does things like arrange homecoming welcomes.  Some will only deal with spouses, but others add anyone a sailor requests to be added.  Same thing with the Family Readiness Groups.  They can be an invaluable source of information and support is they're good.

As for getting through deployment, you learnt to hold him in your heart, trust his love, and learn to be your own best friend when alone.  

Does that help?

[Alex]

Anti M,

Thank you so much! All this information is so helpful. And your last words of encouragement make it seem a little less scary. I know I’ll miss him, but of course I’ll wait for him and love him no matter how long he’s away. But I might still ask him for a short recorded message mefore he leaves, so I don’t forget what he sounds like. I guess it will be kind of like bootcamp but 3 times longer lol. I’ll ask him more about the ombudsman list, but are there any criteria to be considered or does it vary? Thank you again for all your help M. I haven’t really used this site much, or any forum site, so I’m so bad at making friends here. But thank you so much ❤️

- Alex

[Alex]

BritishNavyGirlfriend,

Wow!! UK to the US of A, that’s a love that can withstand any distance. I’m so happy fornyou two :) I never thought my first relationship would end up being a long-distance military one, so it’s hard getting used to. He left for basic in August and his first time home was in January. Now he’s coming back in July. At first, the distance scared me but we talked every day, then the time difference from NJ/NY to California was a struggle (due to schedules, I sometimes had to stay up late to talk to him). But that’s all baby stuff compared to a 6-month deployment. I guess that’s part of why I’m on this site, to make buddies with women who are experiencing the same thing. I try to talk to my friends about it but they find it hard to relate, and that’s understandable. How long has he been in the Navy, if i may ask?

[Phoenixmom]

Hi Alex, read your post and I do have to say Anti M is correct. My Son is on a Carrier as we speak. He just recently finished his A school in GL in Jan. 2018 sent to his Duty station next day and then 2 nd week of Duty station he was flown to meet up with his Carrier. From my understanding Being on a Carrier he has more chance of communication, like Anti M Mentioned he has to use their Computers. Me and My Son messenger each other, some days its everyday some days not. so it really depends if they are really busy then you may not here from them. But yes when they port and he can get wifi thats a good thing also. and also if they get permission to go sight seeing that is a good thing for them especially being out at Sea for so Long. I rather my Son on a Carrier because I heard from Mothers that their Sons and boyfriends are ships that cannot have no contact because they are Silent. still learning, this is New for me also and I am a Mother. Alex he will be in your Heart and you in his, if this is going to work you must have faith and trust. and time will tell. Just know he is doing and making a career that may benefit you as well as him. I wish you both the Best of Luck and may your dreams come true with him. Do you know where he may be stationed? Mine is in San Diego! a big difference from GL. Anti M is a big world of help I turn to her also, she is very Knowledgeable she has taught me many things about all of this. so she would be a good person to contact if you have questions.

[Alex]

Phoenixmom,

i’m not going to lie, reading the but about dreams coming true made me a little teary-eyed. How long has your son been in the navy? Mine went to basic last  august, but he’s still not sure where he’ll be sent when he gets sent to the carrier in August. Wow...he’ll already be in the Navy for one year by the time that time comes around. He signed up because of the college they’d help pay for, so some comfort comes from the “hey, one year down, three to go” aspect. 

[Phoenixmom]

My intentions weren't to make you cry, but I can tell you love him and him you. Funny thing Alex I was 16 when I met my husband and I am 52 now that is how long we have been together, but when you love someone you tend to do whatever it takes to be with that person. This July 5th will be a year my son has been in. He is an Electricians Mate. My Son also went in for a trade and for school.  So where is he bright now going to school

[Phoenixmom]

Good morning Alex, hoping all is well with you today. Happy Easter.