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Dani-- [Corey's GF; Nuke MM]
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- Mechanicsburg, PA
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Profile Information
- About me:
- Hi ya'll! My name is Dani and my best friend & future husband Corey recently graduated from boot camp on May 15, 2009 from GL, Chicago IL DIV 191. He is now stationed in Charleston, SC for A school, Power school & Prototype for a total of 15 months.
I'm a sophmore Nursing student at Messiah College in Grantham, PA and I hope to find the strength and determination to finish my college education there while my better half is farther away than I would like him to be (10 hours farther to be exact)!
On days I wake up hating the Navy (which is often) for taking away the person I love I am reminded of something someone very wise once told me, "Love is just about the only thing the Navy cannot take away from you".
- I am here to support or represent my:
- Spouse/Significant other
- Stage of (Sailor’s) Navy Career?
- Enlisted
- When I heard “Navy,” I:
- Was concerned or afraid
- From my experience with the Navy, the most important thing I learned was:
- .
- Through this Navy experience, I now believe:
- It was positive and maturing. Our relationship has grown stronger.
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Dani-- [Corey's GF; Nuke MM]'s Blog
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The race to get married in the Navy
Posted on May 19, 2009 at 7:10pm — 3 Comments
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Ashley
here it is:
"EDIT: I want to add that I read a lot of parents having problems communicating with this sailors. After reading this, I hope you can have a greater understanding of what they're going through. I know I couldn't put it into words as I was going through like I can now, but it'll come in time. As far as the communication, and your sailors being distant, this is mostly because 1) the pipeline is very demanding on your nerves, your time, and your intellectual ability. and 2), and this is the big one, your sailors are being taught a whole new way to think and study, and their level of knowledge now vice the day they left boot camp has increased exponentially. This makes for some awkward conversations. They don't really have time to care about whats going on at home outside the immediate family, so its hard for you to talk to them about your day. They CANT talk to you about the majority of their day. One great way to help mitigate this is for you to find a way to get them intellectually involved in though with you instead of just social pleasantries. Ask them what they think of new policy, or this new thing you saw in popular science. And try not to be hurt when they act like they don't care that their sibling was made fun of at school today. As long as their parents and their siblings are safe and healthy, thats about all they really have time to care about."
My husband just started Power School the first week of October. He did very well in A school and is doing well in PS so far, but he is spending more time studying and often just has time to eat lunch, rush back to school, come home maybe for an hour after work, then go back in for a couple hours to study or stand some sort of watch. And HE's just on VOLUNTARY hours... he's not required to put in any amount of study hours per week. If Corey is, that is really a lot to handle. I missed Ryan a lot this week, and I at least live with him!
But you know all this already. In my opinion, patience here is KEY. Patience, and just intense understanding is required. It sounds like you're really doing your best with that, and I support you. He is probably also worried about keeping up his grades so he can keep his job and eventually be able to support you and get you down here to SC asap. While I have no doubt that he values your relationship to the utmost, the very FACT that he does has to put some pressure on him, you know what I mean? That he wants you down here and is trying to keep his nose to the grindstone to make that happen is a lot, because it's not just his life that he's concerned with now, it's both of yours.
Char made a good point - PS doesn't last forever. Ryan's told me that PS has a 40-50% dropout rate. That's a lot. For these next few months, Corey's gotta keep his head above water. It's going to be a terrible few months, but it's just a drop in the bucket when you look at the years you guys will hopefully be together in the near future. Just something to get through, you know? Keep your eyes on the prize!
All in all, it's kind of like Boot Camp all over again, but MORE intense!! Don't let him see your fear - you have to be strong for him. He needs you to be strong - you being stressed out will probably stress him out more and make him worry more. If you're feeling terrible, come on here and vent to us :) I can give you my number if you'd like, just PM me. Put on your war face girl, you've got it in you. Just keep on supporting him, be there when you can, listen to his woes, maybe he'll open up to you and not feel like he has to be strong and keep his worries from you. But if he doesn't, that's okay too.
He'll get the 19th - 2nd off at Christmas... bring him back, delicately :) Handle with Care :)
Gosh I hope this long message didn't drive you crazy!
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