Son Left Yesterday

[Tammy Murphy]

H Everybody,
My son left yesterday and i received his call last night telling me he had arrived. I knew this was going to be hard but i just did not realize it would be this hard. I have not stopped crying, i know it will get easier but if anybody has any helpful hints till then i would really appreciate it. And one more thing when can he write his first letter. God i miss him so much.

[Linda Hedly]

Hi Tammy,

I have two sons in the military - one in the Navy and one in the Army. One just returned home after his third tour 'over there' and the other one will not be home until December an although in another country is not in harms way. It gets easier after a couple of weeks when they first leave. You will fall into your routine of emails and phone calls as available - technology is wonderful! But, it never gets easier to send them away. I go through the same emotions each time they leave. I have a coffee mug that says " Army Mom - the toughtest job in the Army". It holds true for all services. My husband spent 20 years in the Army as part of Special Forces. He was gone many, many times over those years and I missed him - but is is a whole different story when you send off one of your children. Hang in there - better days are coming. God Bless our Soldiers - I love them all and keep each and every one of them in my prayers! Take care!

[Sonja Boatman]

My son wasn't allowed to write for the 1st 4 weeks in Great Lakes. From there on, I stayed GLUED to the mailbox every Thursday until it came! I cried over each letter........ he sounded so much older, yet vulnerable. Told me what all he missed from home, what he loved 'there' & what he 'hated'....... It does get easier. Especially when they give you the graduation date & you can set your heart on seeing him again. I cried all thru that too. Don't be ashamed to cry - it's an outpouring of your love, pride & bursting heart. In the in-between, I told EVERYbody who would listen where he was & how he was doing. That helped me a lot...... My son's in San Diego now - Point Loma. I'm in PA. A lot of miles between us now but with cell phone & computer, we talk all the time. It'll be worse again when he goes out with the Fleet. Until then, I cherish & save every text message & every call. Please be in touch if you need me.

[Kimberly Parmer (Anthonys mom)]

I agree with all of you....it got a little easier after graduation....but let me ask you...when my son graduated 1 1/2 years ago....after the ceremony, when we finally found him....I triedd hugging him....and he said it is not allowed....I was so shocked....but anyways....it does get easier with the letters, phone calls, and emails...and it is hard EVERY time he comes home and has to leave again....but I think it is harder on them then it is on us....Just be proud..VERY PROUD!

[Emily Burt]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who can't stop crying. My son just left today. I am very proud but our lives are forever changed. Emily Burt

[Marie-Proud Mom of 2 Sailors]

I don't remember the day I recieved my first letter from my son, but they came often through BC. I eased my pain a bit by writing him everyday. Including the day he left. I just added pages and pages until I finally recieved his letter telling me where I could send them. It helped my feel connected still by writing a few lines or paragraphs each day. I think that it helped him too so that he didn't feel disconnected from us.
He has been gone now since Auguat 2008 and I miss him everyday, and still cry plenty, but the ways to talk now are much easier so we talk lots now. Guess I'll see how I've "matured" this past year as my daughter,our baby leaves August 2009. I don't believe it really gets easier I think we learn to cope. Be proud of him and his accomplishments and share that with him as often as possible. Take care

[Jill I]

Keep on N4m'es and I kept a log/letter and wrote constantly - he took it to his bunk when he got it and told me he cried when he found out how much I thought about him - it was pages and pages lonf with cartoons, jokes and compliments to build him UP! I am soooooo much better now but I keep on writing - he left 2/24.

[vicki]

It gets easier...I didn't think I'd ever stop crying either but it happens a little at a time. Hopefully you will be able to go to his graduation...nothing was going to keep me away! Your heart will swell with such pride and yes the tears flow along with every Mom and family there. I've found that his being in the Navy has been a series of good byes but the welcome homes make up for everyone of them!! Keep coming to Navy 4 Moms It is a life saver. Find a group that is from your son's division or his Pass In Review (PIR) graduation date, A school and then when he goes out with the fleet. Remember you are not alone in this journey from the sidelines. Navy 4 Moms offers so much support, compassion and hugs. It was a life saver for me. Take care.

[Jody Gault]

Hi Tammy, some things that helped me that are in addition to what all the other moms have said are: I saw a blog from Leah once. She'd met someone (a commander type) and that person was able to see Leah's son while in BC in Great Lakes. This lady commander said "If you feel like your heart is being ripped from your chest-you're right. But know that your son needs it more than you do". That really helped to put it all in perspective for me that it is he (our son who is just turning 19 next week-he graduate BC 1/30/09) who needs to feel the love from within the most. Also in my research on this wonderful N4M site I found the following videos that help myself, hubby and daughters to understand and feel a kinship with what Justin was doing. Please watch Bootcamp one see:http://www.navyformoms.com/video/1971797:Video:331933/ Bootcamp two see: http://www.navyformoms.com/video/1971797:Video:331927 and finally Battlestations see:

[Jody Gault]

http://www.edwardstechnologies.com/military-technology.asp

(sorry I didn't mean to send it in 2 messages like this). Anyways know that you're not alone (we all felt this very same way). And, yes, it does get better. Our son actually liked bootcamp and he loves his A schooling now. Blessings to you all...........