I need some support

[luvyezika]

Hello all this is my first blog and I hope someone will confort me and guide me.
I have been wanting to join the military since high school but my mother did not approve and since I was young I did as she told me which was to go to college and get a degree. While in college I had my first son and I was so determine to keep going further not to dissapoint my mother and to be able to provide for my son. I put the military to the side and most of my friends joined or got married to someone in the military. With time I believed that I was doing the right thing. I finished school and I went to work and was miserable all the time. I had my second son and got another job and still hate it. Now that I am older I am pursuing my masters in criminal justice while maintining my teaching position now as a substitute and attending online courses. I am still not content with my decision so during the summer I went online and signed up with all the branches of the military and left it to God to decide which branch was the best for me. After a long wait two weeks later I was contactd by the Navy and I was glad. I signed up and it took me till the last minute to actually tell my mom that I was signing up till the day that I had to her that I had to signed over temporary custody to her for both my children. She did not approved at all. I felt like I was doing the worst thing in my life. I can't describe the feeling. Last week I signed my contract and I am leaving for boot camp in May. I am so scarred to tell her that I am actually leaving and that I am staying till December since I have to go to A school as well as C school because I have been offered a job as intelligence. I need her support but I know that I will not get it. I need the courage to tell her now but I am so afraid. I am so happy about my decision but so sad about the dissapointment I am going to receive from my mom. PLease someone advise me or support me and give me the courage. Everyone knows that I am serious about my decision except my mother. I have yet to tell the father of my children but I am not worried about that. Thank you for reading my post.

[Cindy]

You sound like you've got your head screwed on pretty straight. The children - well, that's an issue. But you could not be a good mom and good example for them by living a life and working a job that you hate. There are good parents in the military service. Please follow your dream and prove it. There will be good training in the Navy, and you will grow as a person. Please keep in mind that there are MANY GOOD MOMS in the Navy. All my best wishes to you.

[luvyezika]

Thank you so much. I will prove it. And I know they will be proud. I am so looking forward to leaving and I will mis my children and my family dearly but I know I am making a great choice. Thanks Cindy your words means alot to me.

[Cindy]

Please keep in touch. I really want to hear that you are doing well. I presume you are a young woman. Go for it NOW. When I was in college, I decided that I couldn't change my major because of my age - that was when I was 20 years old! How stupid is that? Fortunately for me, I ended up with a job that I really love. This generation is different. You have to go for it. Keep in mind, the first few weeks of boot camp will suck shit, but you will make it through. I believe you are stronger than most 17 and 18 year olds. GO FOR IT!

[luvyezika]

Thank you for giving me the courage thay my mom won't give me now. Tears are fallin from joy. Thank you. I really do appreciate your words.

[Barbara's Page]

Dear Luvezika,
After reading your blog, I'm proud of you!! HAHA!! You did great for yourself, and pleased your mother as well. You do have a good head on your shoulders, good for you! You'll never regret your education.

Now, it's your turn to be happy, if the Navy is your heart's desire, go for it. As long as your sons are well taken cared for, that's your peace of mind.

With Navy training and expericence, even if you decide after four years, you don't want to re-enlist, you still benefit. Your employment possibiities broaden with Navy back ground.

If after two years and you want to train for something else, you can request for that. There's so much the Navy offers. The worst you could do is not follow your heart. In years to come, you'll think you should have, don't let that happen.

I wish you all the best, and I'll keep you in prayer.
Take care and God bless,
Barbara

[MILATARY FOREVER]

Dear Luvezika,

Follow your dreams. I always wanted to go in the navy, but never did. In stead, I married a navy man, and have had a wonderful life with him. You'll regreat it f you don't go. Thmilatary has so much toofter. afte all your school, you'll be able to take your children with you. They will enjoy the navy life and will meet many new friends. Your mom s proud of you, but in her own special way, just might be scard little. My son is in the navy and has always been stationed right here where we live in va beach, but just 3 months ago got stationed in singapore. At lirst I was a little afriad for him to go but, he loves it their and it gives him another chance to see other parts of the world. Sometimes moms, just don't like to see our children gown up?? GOOD LUCK AND STAY SAFE. TAKE CARE OF THOSE BABIES....

..

[Mary W]

Dear Luvzika,
I read your blog, first I want to tell you I am very proud of your decision. I will assume your Mother's only thought is probably to keep you safe. My son too wanted to join the military and I wanted him to try some college to see if that helped give him a direction for his life. He did not find it there and since we live in a small town he wanted out and to be able to see some of the world, then my only request is that he also learn a trade. He is now a Seabee he has been in for 5 years at the end of this month and has reenlisted for 6 more years, in other words he loves it. He has been to a few countries and has loved all of it, he will soon be headed to San Diego, he has met a great girl and will be married in a year.

On top of it all he has two female friends from here that have also joined the Seabees one is in boot camp now and the other will be going in a few months from now. She is also married, no children yet, but her husband understands this is what she wants to do.

I told my son to find something you love to do and find someone to pay you to do it. I will always support my son and hopefully for you, your Mother will realize how important this decision is to you and how much her support will mean to you. It is also a wonderful example for your children.

I will keep you and your children in my thoughts and prayers.
Mary

[A's step-mom]

Hi Luvzika, Sounds like you have thought about this for a long time. You can not live your life for your mom. You have to follow your own path, and if that is the Navy, Gods speed for you. You will be giving your child a better chance in life too. You will not be with him that much at first, but then after you get depolyed you will be able to see him I hope. Just live your life for yourself, life is too short to live it for someone else. No matter what you can not keep everyone happy in your life. If your mom loves you she will stand with you 100%. At first I was scared for my step daughter, but now I'm on board with her 100%. It will give her so many more choses in her life and she will be able to see the world. You hang in there and I'm here for you if you need a shoulder or ear. Just follow your heart and be happy with your chose. your friend Pam (Alexis step-mom)

[Anti M]

Congrats, and go for it. Your mom may disapprove, but her love for you will overcome her fears.

[jaye lynn (Ship 12, Div. 377)]

Amen to all of the comments above. You can't take care of your family if you have not taken care of yourself. I can say that as a mom and I can say that with my son who is currently two weeks into boot camp who i miss every minute of every day. This is a win/win situation. I wish you all the luck. We will all be here to support you in your journey. When you get your BC dates, you will have to find a way to let us know your Ship/Division so we can make sure that you have people supporting you thru those first 8 weeks. I do know that even though you are cut off from most contact with family/friends in BC, they do have a full staff of counselors/chaplains if you need the emotional/spiritual support to help you thru. God Bless.