Please help (Separation and Divorce)

[Kai214]

I'm in the middle of going threw a separation and I'm not sure what to do. We have been married a little over 3 years and I can not take anymore nor do I want our daughter watching and raised around it. We are currently going threw marriage mediation and I am staying with him for the time. I need a lawyer but can not afford one due to the fact he keeps all the money in his own account that I have never had access to and he keeps all the income tax money. I've had an appointment with JAG but missed it repeatedly because I have no vehicle and he has the only one and leaves for work around 10am and comes back in the house from anytime from 10 30 to 2am. The time I've been here he's been immature and I would like to finish the mediation before I leave but also have a lawyer to go over things. He was suppose to get me a car but now refuses because I want to leave. He's been giving 250 for the last year for an allowance and I can never save from getting things for my daughter, the dog and I and adding to the food in the house he doesn't get because he says he doesn't make enough. He has been in service for the time we've been married and he is now an E5. I was told by a friend to contact his command about certain things but I do not know how to get in touch with his command and if i did, i wouldn't know what to say. Also I had a car before that he kept in his name but a lady ran her light and hit the car with m daughter and I inside. He later said we couldn't afford another and he had to pay on it because it was totaled but I called the insurance and found out that they and gap insurance cover the entire thing. I told him i needed transportation in case something happens, to do laundry and I cant keep walking to the store with our daughter in the heat and he just gave me days he may be able to take me somewhere or to see my lawyer. I didn't think I'd need to save or would be going threw this but I am and have nothing saved up nor do I know what I am doing. I do feel like its unfair that when i leave he gets to keep everything because its in his account and I would get 600 in child support a and have to start over from scratch. He's been disrespectful, dishonest, verbal and emotionally abusive and last year he cheated and I cant bring myself to trust him when he's thrown it in my face three times. So this and more is why I need to get out. I feel like in the process of trying to be a mother an wife I am losing myself and I do not deserve this. We have no communication at all. When I get upset i shut down and will not talk for days sometimes and he is the opposite. He yells and curse and degrades and harasses. No regard for our daughter screaming or yelling to stop. He told me that he would get out in a year and had been telling me that for almost a year now and i just found out in mediation by him telling them he plans on staying in and he's also been started a retirement plan that I did not know about. I need to know what I can do or information on who to talk to and my rights. Any information would help

[Joplin Girl]

I can't help you with the legal aspects of this, but you need to stay strong and do what is best for you and your daughter.  It will be REALLY difficult, but there will be solutions, resources, help and answers out there for you if you keep trying.  I am 3 years divorced, and had similar issues, both with my ex and lack of money.  I was even the main breadwinner, but he controlled the money and bank accounts.  I didn't have any money for an attorney or to move out.  Fortunately, a path opened up for me and I was able to get free.  I will keep you in my prayers.and hope you find your path soon.  Stay strong...

[Kai214]

Thank you, I appreciate it. Everyone keeps saying I should of been saving what I could but when I married th that was the last thing on my mind. I love and trusted him. All I keep thinking now is I should of been smarter. I do hope things work out and something comes up soon.

[Hello2u]

wow this is sad this is were you need your family to help you can you contact mom dad aunts bff to stay with Just gotta do it even if you need gov help til you get back on your feet you can do it! be there done that!

[abbyblue]

find a abuse women center this sounds like abuse to me. he is controlling everything. you must remove your self from this man.