A boot camp Dad posted this on facebook and I thought is was so good, I wanted to share it her:
The Five Stages Of Loved Ones During Basic Training. Stage
1: Denial ... The first thought is one of disbelief. The person cannot believe their Loved One wants to join the Navy. (Are you kidding me???) This stage is often accompanied by deep sighs and a hope that sanity will return.
Stage 2: Anger “OK. Are you are just doing this to get even with me for something? Why are you trying to be mean me? Have you sought professional help?“
Stage 3: Bargaining “If you don’t go, I will cook your favorite meal EVERY DAY.”
Stage 4: Depression “OMG, (He /She) really is gone to Boot Camp. I won’t get a letter for TWO WHOLE WEEKS! And no phone calls for a MONTH! And I won’t get to see (him / her) for TWO MONTHS!!! Sigh… Life as I have known it is over… “
Stage 5: Acceptance “PIR is almost here!!! I am so excited!!! I am so proud!!! What am I going wear? How do I get there? Can my entire extended family attend? Can I stand next to my Sailor during PIR? Will there be an entire team of photographers and videographers dedicated to my Sailor’s every move? Can I meet (him / her) outside before they march in? Can I come live in their Division area with them until Graduation Day??? Etc… etc… And then suddenly, before you know it, you are sitting there and the door rises and in they march in to the Drill Hall ...
My stages looked like this...
Stage 1... "SIX MONTHS! They won't take you any sooner?"
Stage 2... "I'll be d@mned if you sit around the house and do nothing just because you're leaving for the Navy in January"
Stage 3... "Yeah... try getting away with THAT in the Navy!"
Stage 4... Getting the box.. "Gross. I never knew girls could smell that bad."
Stage 5... "I hope I don't get stuck behind a knucklehead waving a sign at the graduation"
Stage 6.... "Congrats Honey... Oh by the way, I took five minutes and saved on my cell phone and car insurance. You're earning money now. Handle it."
I need assistance on stage 6 with my younger son. Do you have your shingles up for consulting?
As parents, we are always redoing stages. Double damn.
Now THIS I can relate to, except our SR is male. I would add another Stage
Stage 2.5 or 3.5 - You really should get out and run and get some exercise so you'll be ready for Boot Camp. Oh Mom...you don't know anything. We only have to excercise like an hour a day. Sure Son, keep thinking that.
Oh thank you so much!!!! I have been saying that, and I get the same thing....."Mom, I can handle it. I WAS going to go run, but now that you mentioned it, I think I won't!" I been through the "Are you sure they can't take you sooner?", the "You're not sitting around here doing nothing.", the "You will pay rent each week to help cover the cost of those groceries you keep eating." to the "Holy cow....it's only 28 more days, and my baby will be leaving me for who knows how long!" I already wrote a letter to him to mail! Crazy, I know, but I miss him before he leaves! I'm glad I'm not alone in this.....thanks to all of you!
Mine didn't want to watch any of the youtube videos until the day before he left. He went in TOTALLY ignorant of what was going to happen, other than the first night. I think that may have been safer...he wasn't nearly as anxious because he had no clue what he was getting into. His first letter said, "Why the HELL didn't you talk me out of this?" I laughed. He needed this desperately.
This is a crazy rollercoaster ride that you will survive. The time passes faster after the first few weeks. It hardly seems possible that he has been gone for 6 weeks now and we'll see him in just 2 1/2 more weeks.
That's way too funny.
Yep. I think your experience is a lot more common than you think. While I suspect that there are those that can relate to the experiences shared in the opening post, I think there are at least as many of us who let go a sigh of relief when they first took the oath at MEPS. Not because we are all that fond of being separated from our kids, but because we recognize that this is a half decent path to responsible adulthood... even if it means chipping paint.
Stage 1...Many times I said the same thing-we were counting down the days-it's not like the movies where they get on the bus the next morning after enlisting!
Stage 2...Richard had to lose over 77 pounds & work out 3x a day. Hopefully that helped prepare him for PT
Stage 3..."Good luck saying that to your Chief!"
Stage 4...Half asleep when he called us after arriving at BC in GL. The most important part that I remember was when he said "I love you"!
Stage 5...When is that damn letter coming with his address??? Can't wait to get a letter from him...
Stage 6...I miss him, but with him gone, it's like my husband & I are on a second honeymoon-cool!
This is more like my stages! Our nephew joined after we tried to show him that he did
not have anything else to do with his life! I am happy for him and how he is doing well....but so excited he is finally gone and getting his life started!
Thanks for making me smile. I loved your statement "Is there do overs" lol
WOW, the five stages is all the feelings I had to the tee! It has gotten a little easier, He has been at boot almost 3 weeks now. So I should be getting a letter, and short phone call soon! grad date is: 04/27/2012. I can't wait to see him! Thanks for all the helpful information!