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Ever have one of those nights when a deployment just hits you? My husband hasnt left for a deployment yet...but i know its coming up and fast. It was about 1 in the morning and i couldnt sleep, he was beside me snoring away. When it all of a sudden hit me that one day he wouldnt be there beside me. I complain all the time how he steals all the covers and pillows and manages to make a king size bed feel so small lol, but id gladly fight for covers and pillows then be in a bed alone. The tears just started to fall like a damn faucet...im not much of the emotional type and to cry out of nowhere like that. I cried for a good two hours while watching him sleep (wow that sounds like a creeper).

Just sharing my story and wondering if anyone else gets like that or am i just a big baby?

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thank you, best wishes to you too (:

Yep i felt the same exact way except im the one that steals the cover and makes the king bed seem small and snores. He loves me flaws n all. Its been a month n a half since he has been gone and sometimes i wake up and reach for him. Im used to spooning with him and i find myself holding my pillow. Going to sleep alone at nite is really weird.. Ps u are not a big baby lol

i know im ready and can handle a deployment but itll still suck (especially at night alone). For christmas my husband got me a navy teddy bear and it helps so much. I know it seems stupid to be a married woman cuddling with a navy bear at night but it helps alot. i spray it with his cologne and it wears his dog tags

(((HUGS)))

What you're feeling is very normal!  And in fact, I would strongly encourage you, if you haven't yet, to take a COMPASS class - they're free, they provide lunch an d child care, and they talk about deployments and the emotional stages you go through (right now, you're in "anticipation of loss"), and offer good tips on how to get through it.

But what you're feeling is very normal.  Also, don't be surprised if, as it gets closer, you get to the point where you're feeling just the opposite - where you want him to "hurry up and just GO already' - it's not that you don't love him, but it's because it hurts, and you just want to rip that band aid off and get it over with...

Just know though, as hard as it is, many of us have been there (or will at some point), and we do know how you feel, and are there for you!

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