Girlfriends, Fiances,and Wives of Sailors

Are there any girls who currently have boyfriends/Fiances in Port Hueneme, CA?

Have you found the boot camp group yet?  Lots of good links and basic information.  You'll want to be in the PIR group there when it forms up.  Definitely use as many groups as you need!

http://navyformoms.com/group/bootcampmoms

When she knows her rating, and knows how long her school is, you can begin planning the timeline. 

Because you are both active duty, things are a little more complicated.  The distance is definitely outside any liberty limit, so I am assuming you'll try for leave or an out of bounds chit.  Training commands tend to care about such things.

When she gets to A school, she will put in a special request chit asking to marry.  She will need to go to a class or to the chaplain.  Then when you get there, you just go to the county clerk for the license, and you can find what you need to do online.  Just google the county clerk for Pensacola.

Getting married while she is in school is much more of a concern for dependent spouses than for active duty.  First term sailors coming out of A school are NOT eligible for spouse co-location.  You can both put in the form/request, but the instruction specifically says your training dictates that needs of the Navy take precedence directly after school.  Best you can do is hope the detailers are feeling generous.  I was half of a mil to mil couple, and it is a hard road.  Not saying that to dissuade you, but be aware this is going to take a lot of dedication, trust, communication, and potentially a few years apart.  It can be done, I'm near my 29th anniversary, but I want you to understand your challenges.  My "due time" was most of a year apart engaged, then two years apart after we married.  Even then, I had to separate instead of re-enlisting after a year and a half together.  

Regulation:
http://www.public.navy.mil/surfor/ccsg11/Documents/MILPERSMAN%20130...

I wish you all the best.  It can work out, although I know very little about seabee bases... but it seems as if there are often air bases nearby.  

Because you are both active duty and just starting out, marrying during her school is much less of an issue.  Marry when you can, even if it is when one of you is on leave after completing school.  If she is in P-cola long enough, she'll have leave over the holidays.  Marry then, she won't meed a chit.

We married in Vegas when we were both on leave, we both already had orders, but we didn't know when we'd see each other again.  We were E-6, same rating, nearly identical NECs.  Made it more difficult, because we were competing for the same billets.  You will never have that problem!

Thank you so much for your response Sophia! It's very overwhelming not knowing what to expect exactly. There is just so much to know!

So you got 1 month back pay + half of the current months base pay and BAH? And that included his base pay and BAH, but when did you get the FSA (separation) and BAS (subsistence pay)? ..I'm still learning the acronyms.

Also, did you get a power of attorney when your husband left for boot and training?

Oh and when did they deduct the money for uniforms and items that he needs? THANK YOU!!!!

BAS is for the military member, never for the dependents, so do not look for it.  That goes in and then back out during boot camp.  It is for the sailor to eat with if they are not eating in a government facility.  That means when he deploys, you lose that grocery money.

The first check can be smaller because yes, they do deduct for necessities and certain uniform items.  Taxes too, state and federal (states vary).  BAH, maybe in the first, sometimes it is in the second check, but yes, that allowance is backdated.  

My husband arrived in late march and his first check was April 15 and included pay and bah. There is no BAS when in boot camp because they are fed there. BAS is for them to buy food when living off base. So if they're assigned to a ship later that has a galley, they might not get bas then either. Also, according to my husbands les, they gave him ~$250 for initial clothing but debited $700 on the next check for it. And FSH was on the April check. If you're already married when he goes and they have all of the paperwork in order, you should get your bah with the first check.

Anti M - bas does not go in and come back out in boot camp, it's just not there at all. Not that it matters in the end, the result is the same :)

Thanks!   They use BAS as an accounting thing, so sometimes you'll see it do that in the fleet. Someone somewhere is counting those pennies.

For those of you wondering when the paycheck will come and what is debited. For some of you long-term couples out there, most of this might be obvious, review from other jobs,or maybe old news because your SR already left, so just skip to the parts you're looking for, if any. My fiancé is currently in basic training. Because we are not married I do not receive BAH, but I do handle the finances and can tell you how the check should work based on the info my SR has received at basic and shared with me. If you think it might make a difference for timing, we use Navy Federal. Your SR's check should appear on the first of the month, so for example, my fiancé left the 6th of Jan 2016, and his first check was 1 Feb 2016. If the first paycheck comes the first of the month six weeks after he began RTC, it will include the extra two weeks of pay. What is deposited into the account should already have all allowances and debits. So, any debits can be budgeted in advance by subtracting the amount from the amount you expect your SR to make after taxes. You can make reasonable estimates before you even see the paycheck. I was only off by a small amount. Taxes apply to the state of IL, BAH is an allowance not income, and is not taxed. If you are divorced or unmarried with a child, BAH can be a grey area, but usually it is only the amount due to child support and not impacted by the cost of living wherever he goes. BAS is usually only granted when living off base (not being fed by the Navy) and is also an allowance, not income.

Shortly after they first arrive (about 5-10 days), they will have some of their paycheck debited for a NEX card. This is how they will purchase calling cards, paper, stamps, even some candy when they perform well haha. My SR only lost about $50 purchasing his first NEX card and hasn't had to buy another one yet. If you're looking to save a few dollars here and there, allowing your SR to purchase some items at the NEX can be cheaper and faster than sending them to him/her. 

My fiancé received 2 sets of dress whites, a set of dress blues, and his MSU's (the khaki and black uniforms) on 28 Jan 2016. He said they supposedly give an annual $250 for uniforms, but the dress uniforms are so expensive that it doesn't feel like much of a difference. It is best to assume they will get them before their first paycheck to make it easier to debit and also to allow time to correct any defects. Again, supposedly, if there are any defects when they get them or when they report to A school, the defective items should be replaced by the military and not out of pocket. There have been scheduled changes to uniforms that are coming out in waves, but SR at RTC should receive the most up to date.

If you are not yet married (like my fiancé and I), do not count on BAH (or BAS if applicable) immediately when working on your long term budget. Allow yourself a wide buffer of about a month to be processed into DEERs, especially if you don't submit a chit beforehand because they won't be expecting the change. You SR entered a contract with the Navy as single, so there may need to be adjustments made if that changes. 

Finally, if your SR has not left yet for RTC or is still in the early stages, there are many ways you can save while he is gone. Just ask! If you are using AT&T, for example, as long as they can find your recruit on the DoD page, they will suspend the phone without additional fees...no phone bill for two months! From personal experience studying abroad, I know Verizon will do a reduced rate to put a number on hold for up to three months at a time, but they might even have better offers for service members. You may also want to look into EasyStart and other certificates if you use or plan to use Navy Federal. This is something recruits will be coached about at basic while learning about financial planning, and you can talk ahead of time about which options, if any, are best for you guys.

https://www.navyfederal.org/pdf/ebrochures/1169ep.pdf

http://www.defensetravel.dod.mil/site/bahCalc.cfm

Here is a link to a general explanation of the certificates thing I was talking about and a BAH calculator, which is usually based off the sailor's location (with some exceptions that you would know about before they applied) and related to the local cost of living for those of you expecting to receive it now or in the near future. 

Happy Budgeting!

Good to know. My fiancé said they told him it was always where he was living in his financial planning, but this could explain why I was off a bit. I have to go entirely math based because I am not able to see any detailed version of the check. We were convinced to wait after I returned from studying abroad because it might delay his ship date, especially with me being out of the country so long, which we had a hard enough time getting in the first place. Turns out now we have to do all this paperwork to get married without getting yelled at, and since I can't stay in GL too long, we have to try to establish power of attorney and everything too, so he can keep working on things after I leave. Speaking of which, has anyone here ever done that or is more familiar with legal things (military or not) when you come from different states of residence ( we never actually established just one, we moved a lot between our hometowns) and are meeting in a third state to sign power of attorney documents? haha oh sometimes this can all be so much fun. I wish I would've read about it more before we decided to wait. His recruiter was like God when making decisions over the past year after we had problems with the Army (no disrespect, my fiancé got injured playing football with friends and had a long recovery).

The uniform replacements have to do with changes to the uniform, but it is mostly females I think who are changing something....maybe caps and button colors, I can't remember exactly, but like I said, in RTC they should get the most up to date. Could uniform allowance have anything to do with rank? Usually it is largely ignored at RTC, but maybe that's why he said $250? In case you haven't picked up on it, this is why I handle the finances haha. He might be a little lost out there, but some of it he actually took notes on for me, thankfully, and he did make a reasonable choice for how to build his savings...although it scared me half to death when money just disappeared from his checking account five minutes before the new savings account finally loaded for me on my computer. This is where I struggle without him, I have a lot of trouble with technology, so something is wrong with my internet, and I'm totally lost haha

Thank you for the updated and additional info. It makes it all a little less stressful when we hear advice from someone ahead of us. What A school did your husband go to?

That's crazy! That's where my fiancé is heading and will be doing either FC or ET. If I want him to have power of attorney for me, is it the same deal with the CPC? Also, already being married and in GL...what horror stories, if any, do you have of couples that got married PIR weekend? I've heard they're more strict than others about this. I know they want to protect their sailors from marriage scams and make sure they know all the benefits, but we've been together for a long time and been through a lot of similar things we expect from the Navy while I studied business in France, so it seems ridiculous to think I would be trying to steal his money or he just wants to get BAH, but the Navy doesn't know our whole back story, and we're not super concerned about the benefits because he would prefer to forfeit the BAH to live on base because I was late getting my license, and lived in a country that I couldn't drive the cars if I wanted to, so I'm still trying to get a year accident free under my belt for insurance, and he doesn't want to worry about a car yet ( I think his heart is really set on his dream car, this old ford thing, and he wants to ditch my Prius haha). Plus, I think he has to live on base while in school. I don't need his GI Bill because I'm almost done and my school is relatively inexpensive to most American Colleges, and I have health insurance...although TriCare pricing is much more attractive compared to mine. I also feel like I'll have plenty of time to educate myself on benefits while he's in school and studying. Anyway, we've been planning this weekend for awhile (not a big ceremony, just a couple runs to the courthouse and getting enrolled in DEERs), but now I'm reading they don't like it when you run off and get married PIR weekend. Is it really that big of a deal...will he get in trouble?

No one has reported getting in trouble for marrying PIR weekend, however, they do sign a page 13 stating they will obey all the liberty rules.  That includes not getting married.  So it is possible to get in trouble, which could be anything from losing liberty privileges to losing their school.  Is it probable?  Not based on past knowledge.  You never know when they will decide to crack down, so you have to go by whatever the current "feel" is.  No one on the RTC side can give him permission to marry, TSC is the school side and "owns" him after PIR.  Two commands.

You can't access his GI bill anyway, not for ten years.

AECF is long enough to live with him offbase.  Many couples do, either in an offbase rental or in housing, which is right next to base.  Once you are married and he has you enrolled in DEERS, he can put in a Live Ashore packet to reside with you offbase.  Takes about a month.  He has to be in good standing, which is what makes me wonder about the repercussions of a PIR marriage.  Just a lot of what ifs involved.  

Once you are married, he gets BAH for you whether you live together or not.  During training, if you live elsewhere, he can live in the barracks for free.  No problem in A or C school.  This will not be true at future commands, married sailors must have their own domicile unless approved for special circumstance geo-graphical bachelor.  This does not include a spouse who doesn't want to move because of school or job.

A word about Tricare.  If you carry any other insurance, Tricare becomes secondary.  Very few other insurances can compare to Tricare, which is essentially free to dependents on prime, and very cheap on standard. 

Uniform allowance tables:

http://www.dfas.mil/militarymembers/payentitlements/2016ClothingAll...

Anything called a pay is taxable, any allowance is not.  State taxes are by where you hold residency, usually the home of record.  If you each have a different state residency, you each pay taxes in those states.  You can file a joint federal tax return, but must file individual state tax returns.  I switched mine to my husband's state, as they did not tax military pay, or dependent pay out of state.

The biggest uniform change on the horizon is changing the crackerjack dress uniforms.  For women, they will get new dress blues, the crackerjacks instead of the suit.  It will be an expensive change.  

The good news on the NWU change is most uniform changes are gradual, and there is time to wear the old uniform before spending money on the new ones.  

More detailed uniform allowance explanation:

https://www.navycs.com/blogs/navy-clothing-allowance

Anti M that's a lot off great info. I'm not worried about relocating because my school has a couple of integrated campuses around the world and online, but I'm currently on a break anyway after a year and a half of no vacations or anything. I think we'll probably try to get the proper paperwork done. As much as we want to be together, I don't want to risk a bad start to his career. Do you know about AECF? He hasn't heard if he'll be ET or FC, but I don't think that matters for this. When would be a good time to do it? I've heard the phase 2 liberty is the best time, but is it possible to do it before? I don't really mind if he has two buddies following us around, we need two witnesses for power of attorney anyway...at least in my state. It would be nice to try to get it done when I already planned to be there, give him power of attorney, and come home and start making my arrangements to move since I'm pretty sure the Navy won't pay for that. We can try to do DEERs together, or he can do that and the live ashore packet (with the power of attorney). I wouldn't plan on taking him overnight or anything since it's not allowed, and he thinks it will actually remove some of the stress to do it then because he can handle some paperwork in his free time, but it'll be hard on us to try to coordinate everything again, and he'd rather just have me there. I'm not going to let him risk getting that paperwork filled out. Do you know about how long it takes a special request chit to go through?

Hello everyone,

I am so glad to join this as I have learned so much in the past few days. My husband leaves for boot camp in March and me and my daughter of 3 will miss him. I am glad this is here so I can talk and learn more of what to expect while hes gone and what will come next. My Husband is going to be in school for GSE and we have been told that 99% he will be based in Norfolk. I know this is the Military and nothing is set in stone.

I know I gotta learn these abbrevations that everyone is talking about so I dont feel so dumb

Allison, I was an ET, so while I was at Great Lakes a long time ago, I have kept up on what I can through N4M and other places.  I joined to support my friend who became an ET, and is like a son to me.  He's in the fleet now. So is my nuke nephew.  

A special request chit is supposed to be done in a couple weeks or faster, and he can submit one anytime.  Phase one is fine, he will need to get on it early, so he can either go to the class or chaplain counseling and get that out of the way.  It pertains more to very young sailors, but it also provides many answers about resources and benefits for dependents. 

Phase two is a good time to get married and begin the packet. Some wait until phase three so they can have an overnight stay on their wedding night, but that is a personal choice.  It means more to some couples than to others.  He can enroll you in DEERS without you present, although getting the ID card is easier together.  If he's begun school, he'll need time off to go get this all done, maybe not much, but cross that bridge when you get there.  

You are right, the Navy won't pay for your move. However, you can stay in Great Lakes with minimal stuff, and go fetch it when you can.  He'll be there about a year total, so you have lots of time to decide.  The trick will be when he get orders to C school, some are very long, long enough for another move, some fall just short, so you get stuck in Glakes for a few months without him. Noting to worry about now, just a head's up that is gets complicated (and expensive).  

Welcome Micheal.

If you use this site with "desktop view" you can see there is a link to terms on the left side of the page.  No so great on mobile.

GSE is a rating which goes anywhere the Navy has ships, power plants, and ship repair facilities.  Norfolk is simply the biggest base, but your chance of going to San Diego is just as high.  Or anywhere there are ships homeported.  I'd say Norfolk was 55%.  

GSE is long enough for you to move to Great Lakes, I think.  Is that something you were planning? Or will you wait until he gets orders to his first duty station?

Oops, nevermind, the link seems to be missing.  Here it is:

http://static.ning.com/navyformoms/custom/media/pdf/NavySpeak.pdf

Well that's handy!  You're within the 300 mile liberty limit, so once he earns phase three, he can come home on weekends!