Anyone with Sailors/Soldiers/Marines in War Zones and Combat Areas

Story to Tragedy in Nevada

So damn heartbreaking, like every life lost or destroyed by anyone serving in our military. I just think of those moms, especially the moms of those who had deployed before....keeping their worry on hold, believing their sons were safe in training....knowing the worry and fear that would be coming with the deployment again, and having the military show up at their door with this horrific news. God Bless them and help them cope.

Welcome, SouthOCNavyMom.  Our Corpsman went to Afghanistan in December.  We are all here for you.

Welcome to the group no one wants to join...and we're hoping we are out of business before 2015! Please pull up a chair and take a look around. We do try to follow OPSEC regs here, no arrival/departure dates, no countdowns, names, etc. Yes we know it's all over the social media, but we do not want con artists and others connecting our moms/dads to their sailor/marine/soldier over seas and try to pull a scam on either of them. 

My son returned home from the desert today and will be sleeping in his own bed tonight....I think I''ll rest easier tonight!

Congratulations Joanie!!!!   Enjoy!!

Oh, Joanie!! what great news!! sleep well, my friend....you deserve it!

 so how do our soldiers go into sandbox, do they got to Germany or Kuwait first, then fly in?  and how long is the flight ?

Pschumacher, we don't talk about the arrivals/departures or routes of our military on an open board here. I agree with Susan, that is a good question for a private message to someone who might know. 

Susan, we have a group here on N4M called "Transitions" for us moms with kids who have left the military. My son jumped through all the hoops, and knew the drill really well, and it took about 11 months to get his first disability check. I've heard it is different all over the country, they have added many folks to that area here to make it move faster. So many to process.

As to the meals, yes, they are eating a lot more MRE's, including breakfast because they are shutting down around the country, moving equipment out as we prepare to move all of our combat troops out. That's why it's important to send those packages! but our young warriors know the drill, knows it comes with the job and no one promised them a bed of roses serving in a war zone. Safety counts first to me. When we first went into Iraq, they didn't even have the proper vests to protect them, but now they do!

Just backed up and read about a months worth of posts and already found myself tearing up.  So many moms with concerns and happy moments and such a mix of emotions.  I'm happy for Joanie that your son is home.  Mine came home in September.  I will always be easily moved emotionally for all of us.  This site is the best to help moms.  I wanted to update on my soldier.  He came home and has been doing fine except for sleep.  So they did a surgery on him this week to remove tonsils, adenoids, and cut his uvola and did some work on his nose to help him sleep better.  I'm praying it  helps.  I just returned from staying a week with him and his wife.  Got to attend Seabee Day and will change my profile picture to one of my photos.  Got to see a demo of what they do out in the desert.  Very interesting trip.  It was such a pleasure to see him do his normal routine in the morning, get up early go to PT then come back shower and go back to duty.  Me and his wife spent the day while he was on base going to exercise, shopping and cooking together for him.  It was fun.  We did alot of catching up and this was really what I wanted to share...you know when they are over in the sandbox, when he was anyway, just like all of you I prayed a million times a day.  I had a Seabee necklace on I'd clinch and hold and bow my head a whisper prayers all the time for him.  This trip we went out on the town and two of the guys in his battalion joined us and he said mom, this guy would guard me when we were out on convoys and a truck needed fixed and the convoy went on he had to stay behind with me and guard me while I worked.  Ladies,  this soldier was no little man, he looked like a giant angel and it made me smile so big to get to shake his hand and thank him for watching my son's back while he did his job.  God sent big answers for my big prayers so I want all of you to be encouraged.  God is listening to us and making a difference.  Keep sharing here and keep praying and they will come home safe.  We are waiting to hear next month where he will be assigned next.  His next deployment is in August.  When they do come home, make the most of their state side time.  I thanked him and his wife for letting me stay with them 9 days.  I was able to take him a scrap book of all the pictures his battalion fb page posted while they were in sandbox I printed them and made a scrapbook.  He really enjoyed it.  I thought it would be nice to have to show his kids oneday when he has kids. 

Prayers for all.  Keep sharing.  Love all.

I gotta boots down!!  Woot, Woot!!

I was waiting for that! I knew is was coming!! welcome home to all of our Sailors and Marines in this last round of "BOOTS DOWN USA!!" Much love from all of us!! Enjoy those hugs, moms!!

We have moms and dads with kids on those ships floating around and on the way to Korean waters, plus those serving on bases nearby. Please reach out to them, let them know they are welcome here, and that we can give them some support during this crisis. We know their fears and we know that we can let them know they are not alone. They are welcome here. 

I totally agree.  It is all so scary.  Our one son just left the 7th Fleet and now in the 5th Fleet.  We can't get him back here fast enough.  We will be meeting him in Hawaii to take the Tiger Cruise with the ship back to San Diego. 

Yelomoon, congrats on Boots Down USA.  Please pass on our appreciation and hugs.

Thanks everyone. I am behind on the news. Was thinking the Korean thing would happen. I hoped I would be wrong.  Praying for all them! I will have to catch up on that. I even got to meet my seabees sailor mom.  She even made a sign for her. I was glad we had the chance to meet her and breifly speak with her. I had no idea what a sailor mom was. I have learned just a little bit more about the navy life. :)

How impressive it was. Nothing to flashy just short sweet and another moment I will always treasure. Thank you Navy!

Hello everyone,

My son is a corpsman that will deploy this fall for the sand box.  He left us four weeks after his high school graduation last May.  So he has done boot camp, A-school, FMTB, and is now at his permenant station for 3 1/2 years.  His first assigment is the sandbox.  I have been so proud of all his accomplishments, but these last orders have me shaken.  Some days I am OK and some days I am not.  I can hardly write this for the tears.  I think I will break apart from within, yet I cannot let anyone here know, especially my son.  I do not what him to worry about anything here.  He needs to concentrate on his job.  I know he will.  I read your comments and wonder how do you survive.  I have already started praying for him and his units saftey.

Curelytop...the first thing is to remember that you are not alone, we all know that fear, we all know the tears...and there is nothing wrong with crying...it helps a lot...do it, wipe your eyes, wash your face and get on with your day. Another thing is that you have to remember, you remember a little boy, a teenager ....and that's who you see going to a war zone. The Navy sees a green side Corpsman who will earn his FMF and be the "Doc"...just like many of our sons and daughters are now Docs. And those Marines and the other Docs have a tendency to look after the younger guys...I remember my 24 year old son referring to a 19 year old "he is just a kid..."and I had to laugh. Your son is well trained, moving forward in his Navy career and learning more every day. If you haven't already, you'll hear that "professional" voice soon....and then he'll fall back into the "son" voice. One time my son read something on the boards here on N4M that should not have been out yet...and I got a call and a full dose of that "professional" voice.."get that off that board, those parents don't need to read about that on an internet forum". ...I will never forget it. But I still heard "I love you" at the end of the call, just like I have since the day he called the first time on his deployment to Iraq. It will change your son, but many of those changes will be maturity and good growth. You're going to get through this, we're going to help you. You are not alone.

Thanks TDM,

I try to stay busy to keep my thoughts from going down the dark path. I did cry then I went outside, pulled some weeds and mowed some yard.  Usually I am at work but we have the day off.  I was the mom that kept guns out the house when the boys were young so that could not be any accidents. Now he is going off to war. It will just take me a while to adjust.  It is lot to grasp.

Curleytop, we are here with wide shoulders and open arms.  With one son in Afghanistan and the other deployed on a ship in the Middle East, my heart stays on the outside of my chest.  All the women on this site are a Godsend and can truly say they have been in our shoes and understand how we feel.  TDM - I agree - I took the advice and decorate the inside flaps of all the boxes and always finding things to send them.  I didn't let my boys wrestle in the house and they turned around and both joined the high school wrestling team!  I also discouraged guns and they both join the Navy - one a Corpsman now greenside with the Marines.  On top of that - sent them to 13 years of Catholic School to go to College.  Go figure. 

JerseySusan, please take a look at the web sites above. Info there for family members of returning vets, about PTS and TBI and the effects it has on family etc...and numbers to get help. You do not have to share your name or your son's name. Please, please take a look.

Yes, I am one of those moms who said no guns in the house. I did grow up with hunters, and that's okay with me, I love venison! but....guns are  for hunting wild game, not hobbies in my book. Now I have a damn gun registered to this house, thanks to my son. grrr...

CurleyTop, you'll find a spot in your mind where you are comfortable....and you'll get through this, Do remember to breathe. Find those projects in the  yard, I painted 3 bedrooms....and if you find it too diffucult, ask your doctor for something to help you. You have to rest, you have to take care of you. You have to sound like mom when the phone rings, you have to stay calm until he hangs up. It's tough. You can do it, the fact that you're here planning it out and getting support tells me you have strength to do this...and believe it or not, it'll be you next year, telling a new mom the very same thing. 

Thanks so much for your comments Susan, Tamme, and JerseySusan.  My oldest son has also chosen a career with guns.  He intends to be a park ranger and will graduate in May with his criminal justice degree.  I admire you mothers that have two sons serving.  What strength you have.  I take it I will be able to mail him things so that will help.  I will begin researching that.  I need things to keep me busy.  Thanks again.  I am glad I am a part of this group.

Thanks KathyProudCM,

I enjoy the hints on how to ship things.  Iam new at all this.  This is my first deployment experience as everyone can tell.  Still working things out but today is a new day.

Curleytop I would also like to welcome you here.  Just listening to  you reminded me that I was exactly where you are now one year ago. A bundle of emotions.  Looking back, I did everything the moms on here advised and it helped so much.  It was like a mission I  went on myself to be my son's encouragement.  Sending boxes was a biggie.  Everytime I was at the store, I'd pick something up.   When my box was full, I'd send it.  I sent one about every other week.  Friends and co-workers contributed.  They liked putting in to the box too because it made them feel like they were doing something to support our troops. 

Update on my son's surgery since he's been home.  He is still in the service of course but they took out his adenoids, tonsils, cut his uvola in the back of his throat in half and did some work in his nose.  It's been two weeks and he said he can breathe better than ever and his throat is still extremely sore.  He had his first day back to the base yesteday.  He finds out this month where he deploys this summer. I feel somewhat anxious about it but I'm trying to just push it aside right now and stick with my plans to stay in touch and visit as much as I can right now before he leaves again.  I plan going again in May and again in July before he goes.  

The FRG group for your sons battalion is also a wonderful way to stay busy.  Even if you live away from their homeport base, you and a family member can keep up with what the FRG group does at their monthly meetings and have a person who is close to you do the same thing.  If they celebrate hump day---celebrating deployment half over...go out to dinner with someone and celebrate it too.  Me and my daughter in law made bracelets with my son's name on them and passed them out to friends and family to put on their review mirrors or to wear to remind them to pray for him.  They all loved them.  Find ways to support him in positive ways and it will help. 

I can't say that we stayed away from guns.  Me and my son took a gun safety course together when he was growing up.  I used to go target shooting and loved it.  I even owned a gun.  I've sold it since but now he handles them and is always taking classes since he became a Seabee and I think he's earned his sharp shooter. It makes me feel better knowing he knows how to use it the best he can should he ever need to use it. 

He was without a voice for two weeks because of the surgery.  Now that he's well I've got laryngitis and can't talk so we've had to text lately instead of talk.  Losing our voices hasn't stop us talking through technology.  Thank God for technology because of it we have this group to come to.  When my dad was in World War II his mom didn't have this.  

Here's my new profile picture.  When I visited Gulfport base in March they had Seabee Day and I got up in one of the vehicles and my daughter in law took a picture. 

I'm sharing this here. Not to frighten our new moms but to reach out to the moms and families of those with newly returned vets. This is one young vet's story and it can be tough to read, but he's a brave young man, and we need to share this story. Combat veteran finds his voice He is here in Austin and I hope to meet him. As you'll see in the photos, he's working with all military families, including a mom with two sons in the Navy. 

Remember, not all vets come home with PTS or TBI, but we have to reach the ones who do. We have to make sure that they and their families know what we have learned on this board, we are not alone. 

Thanks ktssong.  This may be a silly question but what is a FRG group?  I hope I will sound this encouraging next year.  Last year at this time, I was thinking senior prom, high school graduation.  This year I am thinking war zone.  What a diference a year can make.

Yes, TDM.  I cannnot just focus on pre and deployment time, but must also prepare for when my son returns.  I am learning more all the time.  For the sons and daughters that have chosen to serve, I am learning that it is not easy for the family left at home.  We too must find our way from panic to peace.  It is a journey.  Day by day.

TexasDocMom, Thank you for sharing the story.  It made me appreciate the moments my son opens up still and shares little by little what happened there.  I had him a scrapbook I made that he could journal some things in it next to pictures to help talk about it with others as he shares the scrapbook.  I was thinking if he shared it with friends that come over they could talk about things and open up conversations.  I really believe too that one of the things you shared last year I think led me to something about dogs being a good therapy for those returning. I shared that with my daughter in law and son and when he got home they purchased a second dog and they both have one to lay with and pet.  They have really been super good for him.  I have pictures of the dogs laying on him while he sleeps. 

I'm so happy to hear he's got those dogs, and a family willing to wait for him to talk, ktssong! Yes, I remember my son telling me on a phone call from Iraq..."they might say they miss their wives, their moms, their girlfriends...we miss our DOGS!". There is a group that helps veterans bring the dogs they find on deployment home to the USA now.

Julieb 1019,

Your comments were most helpful.  All of you veterans moms have been great.  I would not make without N4M.  All of the groups I have joined have kept me informed about my son's journey but this group definitely rocks.

Kathy, he and you are in my prayers.  I feel the same way you do.

Kathy, that has to be mind numbing scary, stay busy..and remember that saying we hate "no news is good news" when your kid is deployed.  He's busy, he'll be in touch as soon as he can.

I like your prayer Kathy! I agree, no news is good news. Will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.  I think your son is doing great things and I feel better knowing that there are people like your son there. I think your a great mom!

Kathy,

i will be remembering you and your son as well.  Hope communication resumes quicker than you think.

Right after they got home from Afghanistan they got this dog...it was such a blessing to see how peaceful my son  was sleeping and the dog just seemed to know where his place was. 

ktssong...a Boston Terror! my son's GF got a Boston puppy, and my son adores that dog....my dog, not so much! he drove her so crazy if she sees a Boston Terrier on the walking trail,she goes the other way! they are so active! They've split up now, but my son has partial custody of the dog. He wants another dog but with school and work , he's waiting to get a puppy. That photo is so precious. Have it printed out!

I know when my son was deployed, my dog Rosie was my life saver. She just seemed to know when I was having a sinking spell. I don't know how. She would appear at my side and pop her feet up on my leg and look at me....and then I could pick her up and hold her close and let the tears flow. She also made me get out to walk, and up to feed her, and throw the ball, because I knew my son's first question after asking about me, would be about Rosie. I made a video of our walk...you could hear her little feet stromping along, showed the neighbors homes with their flags flying for my son, yellow ribbons on the trees of his best friend's mom (best friend a Marine). Posted it on myspace, and he loved it!

And yes, those Marines love and protect their Docs. Docs hold a special place in the military world, between Marine and Sailor. Our Docs do have Marine training and do the job of a warrior as well as a Doc, they are pretty tough guys. I know I've told this story before, but I'm sharing it again. I met a man when I was working a film shoot (caterer), and we were chatting. He was Navy Reserve, just back from Bagdad green zone, worked in some sort of diplomatic thing. Of course I told him about my son, and that he was a Field Corpsman. "Your son is a Field Corpsman?Really"....and I said yes. He said "you know that those guys are the toughest Mf's around don't you? " and I kind of looked at him, and he said "really...they are, they can do everything". I'll never forget it...my son, always the  youngest in the class, always the tallest and smallest around....that kid was a "tough Mf". My son. And as I learned as time went on, it was true. 

So will each of you. While we fear the effects of PTS and TBI, there will be other changes that are not necessarily bad. They mature, and they grow, and they are adults with hard jobs that they do well, and become respected members of an elite group of people on this earth. So, listen to your son's and daughter's voices carefully....you'll hear it. Be really proud of that Doc, or that Seabee, or whatever your Sailor or Marine or Soldier is today, because he/she deserves it and so do you. It's so damn much fun being a proud mom of good kids. 

You'll cry ...warning!

Oh wow, TexasDocMom, I can practically feel the hug myself. 

Yep.  You warned us but I had to watch and I cried as much as she did.  Those are the moments we all love....hugging are kids.

TexasDocMom recommended I join this group ten months ago.  Although my son did not go to the sandbox, he was in dangerous places.  Reading your posts of fears, despair, and joy made it easier for me knowing I wasn't alone in these feelings.  My son returned to the States last week and returns to his duty station next week.  I am saying "auf wiedersehen" (lots of years living in Germany) to those on the list but know I will be back in a couple of years.  Best wishes to you all. 

Just wanted to let everyone know that my son is coming home!  Yay!!!!!!

I am so excited for you, vansmom. 

Always a good day when "home" is in a post!! congrats, Vansmom!!