Anyone with Sailors/Soldiers/Marines in War Zones and Combat Areas

Thanks all.... I appreciate the "welcome..."  He is deployed 1/7 out of 29palms.... don't know if I said that.  What is really pissing me off though.... is.... he has called the GF who evidently dumped him right before deployment on several occasions.... even after they supposedly were "out" and NO communication.  Yet, I got nothing but a voice mail.  This is SOOOOO frustrating but I guess at that age.... that is what they do...???..... Any of you had that issue?  makes me so darn mad.

Had to share

Nicksmom...You will find this site very supportive among these heart warming ladies. Try not to stress out with the calls to the GF. Sometimes they just need to make those calls as a reality check. Your phone call & your packages will be the most important one's to him, even when they're far & few between.

Hopefully he will send some messages via facebook.... when he is at the base.  Have already sent out two packages.... don't know if/when he will get them but they are loaded with goodies for him and everyone else.  Also, just sent a box with 50 toothbrushes/pastes/flosses (hubby is a dentist....) for him to give out to whomever wants them....

That should do it for a while.... ha ha!

Susan- where would I find pictures if there happened to be a photographer with his group?  I kinda doubt it but you never know....

The Chaplain took some photos when my son was deployed, the ONLY ones I saw except when he was on the MEU and in Spain with his Marines (and which I would have preferred NOT seeing...ha!). Is there a Parent or Family coordinator? sometimes pics arrive that way.

yes, I am on the emarine site.  will def e-mail her to get on whatever email list(s).

thanks!!!

thanks TENN Navy mom.

yes- sometimes forget I was once that age..... and, had I got dumped I would probably be concentrating on that WAY more than calling my parents.  ha ha!

I am sure that she is telling him what he wants to hear..... I just hate that - that is in his head and their is a chance he isn't focused.  I was actually GLAD that the relationship might be over so he COULD focus.... but, oh well.

Anyway, just want him happy.... that is all that matters right now!!!!

Thanks~

nicksmom - definitely work your way through emarine.  It took me several times of going in (and resetting passwords at least three times) before I got the hang of it.  I was on there today and seen he newsletters that go out monthly.  Your son will come around.  I'm so glad my son is single and seems to like it that way!  My husband was in the Army when we first got married and it is a wonder we survived it was so crazy.  Military life is not nice to couples.  Good luck!

I love it for those who are coming home.... mine just left.... ARGH!!!  Maybe it'll be a short time...???....

yes, already liked the FB page a while back.   seems like I am on top of things.... with that, this and the emarine site.

I think, if anything, he (son) needs a bit of a distraction.... so maybe that will be it.... there are at least 2 other girls here that SOOO want to date him.... one of which I adore... but.... as we all know... it is their choice, NOT ours.

On to a more serious topic....   have any of you had that feeling.... where you hear a car door shut outside your house and run to the window?

I am VERY new to this.... he just got there less than 2 weeks ago... but, I am already experiencing the "what if's"

Of course this is all so very private to me and I would never share with anyone other than you all.... but.... did you prepare for the worst?

Seems like I have to.

:(

Nicksmom...The fighting was very heavy when my son was there and, of course, I feared, hoped, and feared some more.  He was not allowed to use the Internet and any phone contacts were with his wife, so I didn't have any direct contact with him.  Luckily, my DIL is like another daughter to me, and she happily relayed messages back and forth.  There were times when I'd hear about fighting where I thought my son was (they get moved around and may NOT be where you think they are) and I'd get that horrible sick feeling...but I tried not to dwell on it for long.  I remember one night when I was in a panic and came on here to find another mom going through the same thing.  We were able to compare notes and calm each other down.  This is THE place to spend time when you just can't do the brave face anymore!  There were also times when I would set my kitchen timer and "allow" myself to wallow in all the "what ifs" for 5 or 10 minutes.  When the timer sounded, it was time to wash my face, dry my eyes, and plan the next package to send, or what I was going to say in a letter.  You WILL get through this, and we will walk by your side.  You are NOT alone!!!

thanks much~

Nicksmom, that fear is real, and you have to face it, and coming here will help you do it. I was very blessed, my son deployed only twice, once with an MEU (ended up on the Lebanon border and all kinds of places I am just NOW finding out about. I thought he was on that ship those whole 7 months, found out he on that ship only about 35 days total. I had no idea and now I'm glad I did not know!) and once to Iraq. Like MT says, we really do not know where they are, we might know where they are based out of or where they went first, but we don't know squat. What I've noticed over the last couple of years is that there are more and more moms who have no idea where the hell their kid is...and I think that's good. With social media that helps classified info stay classifeid. Not good for the sanity in this group, but we know what keeps them safer keeps us saner.

MT makes a good point, sometimes you have to just cave to that fear...crying does help. Get it out....then wash your face and get on with your day. If you get a call that day, your voice will sound firmer and stronger and that is a good thing.

Just wait until the public breakdowns....Walmart meltdowns when you bump into another military mom....JC Penney when the young men's department makes you a molten mess....and if any one has the guts to say anything to you just say "My son is in Afghanistan, where is yours?".

And keep coming here! put that box on the table and put his favorite foods it....beef jerky! Salsa! breakfast bars...we've got a ton of suggestions!  

You are not alone. 

http://www.greatergood.me/NSMwEu

I know we are Mom's of our Soldiers, but I just thought this was just so moving that I'm posting it. I hope no one is offended, I would have given anything for our youngest son's GF, who also dumped him just before his deployment to Africa the end of this Dec. to make him smile like this!!    <3

I really enjoy all that you are saying.... definitely helps!

Totally get the car door shutting thing.... creepy!

Are we able to say on here what div/co. our son is with to see if any of them are together?

Or, no.

If you see a mom with a currently deployed son/daughter, message them privately any of that information that can target your son's location or info. From my own experience I would encourage you to remember that things your son tells you should not be shared with anyone, even another mom with a kid in the same unit or on any public board. He is not telling her, he is telling you, his mom that he trusts. 

When my son was still in the Navy, he'd lurk on these boards and tell me to delete a post, or message someone that they are sharing too much information, etc. If it was on the phone, I'd get to hear the "Doc" voice...deeper and authoritative. 

Once on the Corpsman mom board, a mom posted that her son had told her there had been a death in the recruits he was going through A school with. A lot of unnecessary concern and my son was livid...he was stationed in San Antonio at the time and familiar with the circumstances. I called him to ask about it and heard that it was under investigation and that next of kin had not been notified and the family should not read it on a " %&#$  web site, get it off of there!!!".  So I did. We have to be careful what we post. And yes, I know facebook puts it all out there, but we can control it here. It's also why I think the military is less open about where our Marines, sailors and soldiers actually are with the families.

Thanks TDM, great reminder to us all....

Perfect, Susan!

All of this said, we're open to being able to express our feelings, our thoughts and our concerns....and sending prayers and positive thoughts and energy to those serving and those waiting at home. 

When my son was enlisted, I closed my facebook page to "friends only"...and had a lot fewer friends until he left the Navy. No one needs to be able to connect the sailor with his/her family by finding that info online. Too many con artists out there!

I have been having a little war of my own.  Susan I so enjoy your OPSEC post.  Perfect timing for me.  I know the rule and I know why it is there.  I would not want harm my corpsman in anyway by letting something slip.

That being said, this rule seems to rob my joy of news I get.  I can't even tell all of you.  I am usually a bubbly, bright outgoing person.  People at work are asking what is wrong with me.  I make up excuses about other things.  It is almost like I lie to them.  I am not in the habit of doing that either. 

Can you have a love/hate relationship with the military?  I love what it is doing for my son.  The accomplishments he has he made.  The changes I read in his letters and hear in his voice when he calls.  I hate how I feel right now and that person I am becoming.  I know it is what all mothers do.  Protect.  That is the purpose of OPSEC, but is sure is hard not to say anything when you have something to say.

To nicksmom, I not sure you would want any comment from me right but deployment is doable.  Just think about the next breath you are going to take and go from there.  If you look at the entire amount of time away it is too much.  Stay in the present.  Just get through one day.  As each day passes you are one day closer to a homecoming.

Curleytop, anytime you need to talk or vent...message me for my email address and I will do my best to help you back up to your normal self.

Your post really strikes me...as you all know, my son is out of the military. And yes, I am so proud of the man he became as he served, the things he learned, those changes in his voice and confidence. But I did not realize how hard I was holding my breath until the day he said to me (after falling in love!) "I don't want to deploy any more" That said he told me he was not going to re-up again. I held it together until I got in the shower, and then I cried, and cried and cried...tears of relief. And all I could say was "thank you, God, thank you". Just like the morning I saw that picture of him boots down from Iraq that a fellow Navy mom took right when they arrived back. I could breathe again. I kind of held it until he was totally processed out, because I know he loved his Marines and that he had become more  Marine than Navy serving green side. But he stays close with his brothers, and works with other vets in San Antonio. Now I'm just so proud of the work he has done to graduate from UTSA in two years, and looking to move to his MBA. I pray every day that all of your kids move forward on that path...safe and sound. And yeah, it's the mom control freak talking...it's what we do. We protected them from the day they were born and we get to be this way.

And look how well trained I am...he's out 2 years soon and I'm still saying "my son" instead of his name! Cuz that's OPSEC. You all need to know that he asks after all of you in this group frequently. After being transferred out of 2/2, he learned what it was like to have those you love in a war zone and not be there with them to protect them when they went to Afghanistan.

TDM....You always make my day with your experiences!!

I know this site is probably the most emotionally filled Mom's than any other site I'm sure. The pre-deployments, the present deployments and the post-deployments are all filled with emotional stress on all of us, and that I'm sure is just a fraction of what goes on in our own daily lives back at home. It's  hard not to get caught up in an emotional moment of venting our other issues, than what this site is created for.

I know what you mean Curlytop...keeping a secret with other relatives and close friends eventually begins to weigh heavy that sometime your mind just wants to explode with all the info. Sometimes I have questioned it myself, especially when I get questioned by those who have a deep concern of how, when & where our son is. Yes, I lied to them...that's not me...but then later, I realize I protected him from the ones who unintentionally or inadvertently might reveal his assignment and or place damage of harm to him or his unit. Believe me, I've had my own very close relatives give me funny looks or get upset with me for correcting them of issues that just can't be discussed in public. It's not easy, sometimes they think I'm being ridiculous, but I know it's what I have to do. Our youngest son & my husband got into a terrible argument just before he left b/c my husband started asking him questions in a restaurant & then my husband inadvertently started discussing his departure over a phone line to our oldest son. Our youngest really flipped out. Needless to say, I was very upset that this happened the day before he left, it wasn't any of their faults, my husband just really did not understand the ramifications and consequences it could have had. He's much better now, he really does understand now how crucial it is now to keep that "secret". It's hard for him, he's a very "social" person with everyone. Everything is great with them now. They have made up through "cyberspace"!!! 

OPSEC is a very fine line to follow that's for sure.  When my husband was in the Army he worked on things that he could not tell me about.  I know he left home in the morning and came home in the evening.  For three months I had no idea where he was every day.  This was 25 years ago and by the time he told me what he was working on it was old news.  And that's the way it's suppose to be.  Now, I can tell you my husband is a talker and for him to keep it secret had to be ten times harder on him than me.  We're already holding our breath on that whole re-uping roller coaster with our son. I'm pretty good at letting things roll off of me but when it involves my child, that's a little hard to do.  Almost impossible.  I am forever thankful for this site and for the words of wisdom of all you ladies.  25 years ago this site was not available. 

I was sitting here tonight trying to watch a movie, but couldn't concentrate because we haven't heard from our Corpsman in a while again.  It wears on you.  I am, however, so grateful that today marks the halfway point of this deployment.  The end cannot come soon enough.

My son called this morning.  YaY!  He is doing fine.  I guess I am lucky and don't have secrets to keep because I know nothing.  That is hard in a way as I wish I knew SOMEthing but probably better that I don't.  He will tell me everything when he gets home....

Yea!! you'll sleep good tonight, Nicksmom! And you have a very smart son...that's exactly the thing for him to do!  have a great day!

God Bless Our Son's & Daughters. Happy St. Patrick's Day.    <3  

<3

I sent a care box at the end of January.  I know my son is not in the same place, but the emarine site said they will forward all mail to where the troops are currently located.  I haven't asked him yet if he got the box because I'm sure him telling me he got a package slipped his mind because he's busy.  Can anyone tell me apporximately how long it takes for them to get boxes?  Just curious.  When I hear from him again I'll try to remember to ask him

yeah, mine said the same thing but he has only been gone since the end of feb.  I have sent 3 already.  I think it takes at least 4 if not 6 weeks to get there.... but, if they aren't there.... then maybe longer...???.....  I am sending my sons birthday box (late may) next week.!!!

Pam...It depends on where he is and how often he is moved around.  I have heard of it taking quite a while, but for my son it was a week to 10 days.

Thanks - it's been about 7 weeks so he should get it soon.  To my surprise a huge box from my Corpsman was sitting on my front porch this morning!  I only had time to throw it in the house before I had to get my daughter to school and me to work.  How on earth did he find time to get us something and send it!  Love that kid!  And now I have to wait until I get home from work at 6:30 tonight to find out what it is!  Haha, I'm worse than a child...

Pam, you must be about ready to jump out of your skin with anticipation!  It doesn't matter WHAT he sent...it could be his dirty laundry.  The important thing is it is something from him!!!  lol  (See...it isn't ALL bad and I thank you for sharing.)  Now we are ALL anxiously awaiting for you to open the box and tell us what "we" got!

Susan, there is a website she can donate it to as well which is called military bride wedding dresses or something like that.  They accept donations. 

We got a trunk from my son about 2/3 of the way through his deployment. The dog went nuts sniffing it, finally I opened it. She went crazy rolling in those clothes....when I asked why he sent dirty clothes home, he said "they were CLEAN!! the water in iraq is dirty!". Frankly, it was nice to have his stinky clothes smelling up his room again. I was nervous, there used to be a photo of a HUGE spider on this page at the top, One that came out of the box one corpsman sent home from Iraq. But no spiders, just misc stuff and clothes and books. Paperbacks I had sent him to read and leave...but "I haven't read them yet". So he paid to send them home. Good grief! Can't wait to hear what is in  your package! 

Just "LOVE" how we are All Excited about what could be in Pam's Son's Corpsman's box, even if it's his laundry!!!!

Lunchtime!  Halfway through the day!  I will def. post what it is - even if it's clean (dirty) laundry.  LOL  The hard part is going to be making my daughter (who will be home from her little cheerleading camp at 5:00) wait until Mom gets home. She's 7 so she loves packages - even stickers from Marlo Thomas!  At least my day is flying by!

LOVE the pic Jersey Susan!

Well there's a story behind this and without saying where he is I'll skim over the top.  My son is currently deployed to where his father was stationed 26 years ago.  We had a mink blanket for years from that country. Loved it and our boys took many naps on that blanket when they were babies!  We ended up getting rid of it because it had gotten moldy in storage when we moved to Georgia.  My son bought him another one and sent it for him.  How incredibly thoughtful and the look on my husbands face was priceless.  He also sent a couple knick knacks from there and the one thing his Dad asks for EVERYTIME he goes somewhere... a postcard.  LOL - it's never how are you son... it's always where's my postcard?  We bought a world map when he left for the Navy and have kept all the different postcards tacked up on the map.  So, no dirty laundry thank goodness.. haha, but it just makes me miss him SO much more!  Thanks for letting me ramble ladies!

Pam...How wonderful!  I agree you have a very thoughtful son.  If you haven't already, bury your face in that soft mink and think of your "baby".  (I bet he did the same before he sent it.)  I love your map and postcard idea!  It is a very personal way to decorate a room...that probably has many stories behind it. 

I understand, that something like this probably got the eyes misty...but happy tears are SO much better than sad or fearful ones! 

Oh, happy tears ARE so much better!  Yes, it was nice he stayed blue side for the first two and half years and was able to travel a lot before going green. 

Good news everywhere on this page! Yes, I think my son came out more Marine than Navy after 5 years greenside and the two of being an instructor, serving with more Marines! 

It is a great day all the way around!  I just wish we could talk to him to let him know how much we loved the gift.  So happy you got to see a picture TN Navy Mom.  Just makes your heart warm.

Shout it from the roof tops.  No OPSEC can stop me now.  Our son returned last night from Afghan.  I could not get my Iphone to work to tell you.  Hours and hours of waiting, worth every minute.  He was looking for us and then he said " I saw this pink tornado coming towards me through the crowd."  Guess who?  Mom, in her Devil Doc shirt.  He said I about knocked him over.  I did not care.  Boots Down USA, ladies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Have a great Sunday.  We are with him until Tuesday.

Crying happy tears for you, Curleytop!  What joy!!!  I bet when your eyes saw him, he was the only one you noticed.  You don't have him for long...so get your fill, and be sure to give him a big hug from ALL his Navy Moms. 

My only request is now that he is away from that place, please keep stopping in.  You have so much to offer to others Moms on this journey.

WHOOOHOOOO!!! Give that Doc a thousand hugs from all of us!! Welcome home!! And I agree with MT, your voice is needed here, Curleytop!! And really, if you have that first hug photo, we'd love to see it!!! It does happen, they come home!!!

WAHOO Curlytop!!!

Yay for the great news and experiences...!!!   I had a weird thing happen over the weekend and will call FRO on Monday...  nothing "weird" as if that was so I wouldn't post.... just kinda strange.... ha ha!   ANYway,   AWESOME on the return!!!   WoW!!!

@Curly top... please do keep posting as Much Trouble suggests.....  I am VERY new to this site/post and have no clue what is up......

Enjoy all of your posts to everyone~

Nmom~

Double, triple YAY!!!!  Enjoy the short time you have with your son Curlytop.  So happy for you and so happy he made it home from that place!  Tears of joy all over again!  This whole military journey is such a roller coaster!

Congratulations, Curleytop!  Please give him our thanks and welcome home.  Now you can breathe normally again. 

missed another call. dang it~  oh well, he left a message so all is good!