Son being medically discharged because of anxiety attack and depression in boot camp, 2 weeks in..

[duckgirl321]

Hi, if anyone can offer advice on what to do i would be greatful. I recieved a phone call friday, end of week two of bootcamp....he has been taken to ship 5, he had an anxiety attack in class (didn't quit smoking before he went in even though everyone told him to) probably due to nicotine withdrawals and sleep exhaustion possibly. They sent him to psych and they asked how he was feeling and he said he hates it there, they labelled him as depressed and asked if he had ever seen a counselor or anything before. He told the psych that he had seen one when he was 14 during his parents divorce. On his paperwork, it seems he checked NO to ever seeing a counselor previously, i am guessing he thought his records as a minor were sealed. he only went 4-5 times anyway and there was no real diagnosis.  Well we got another call last night and he was completely uninterested in fighting to stay there...he said it would take 3-4 mos. to fight it anyway and he just wants to come home.....i am unlike most moms on here, as i don't want him to come home. i want him to fight for the career he was so anxious to have for the last 6 months while waiting for bootcamp. i wish they wouldn't let them quit so easily.......ughhhh.....

[duckgirl321]

does anyone know more about fighitng to stay in and getting a waiver...i just got a call from him and he was going to legal. i begged him to find a way to stay in and fight for a waiver.

[momofcct]

no, duckgirl321...my son wants to fight to stay in so to be in his best interest, i hired a civilian mil. atty.

[duckgirl321]

thanks for your response....we are not sure as of yet what RE code he will get and it's hard when you only talk to him twice a week.  He seems better now, i gave him some tough talks about fighting for his career and chin up sort of things. he says he is going to fight for it, but he truly doesn't think they will listen....so not sure about anything at this point....He still has not gone to legal...said he has to keep waiting until they tell him it's time....

 

[Angie]

Once they go to the doctor and say things...it is in their record forever!  Very hard to fight to stay in being labelled as depressed and having an anxiety attack.

 

They would rather find out now that people can't handle it instead of out in the middle of the ocean.   

 

Not everyone is qualifed to be in the USN.

[windowartist]

I'm just reading this now but I see you posted this last nov.  My story is almost identical to yours, but it's just unfolding for me today.  My son waited so long to get into the Navy, got clearance for a great job and now after his 2nd week is over, he calls and tells me he saw the psych. yesterday because he is depressed like he's never felt before and anxious a lot.  He is in ship 5 and I feel the same as you- wanting him to stick with it and not come home.  I thought he was tougher than this and his Dad and I are really disappointed.  I thought it would be a lot harder to quit than this.  Just wondering how it all worked out for your son.  How long did it take for him to get home and what was the discharge code they gave him?

Thank you,

Mom in Colorado

[windowartist]

thanks for replying.  So, did you also experience this?  I told my son I love him but I'm glad I have  a little time before he gets home  honestly to process my own feelings.  I struggle with feeling like he gave up too quick after wanting this so long.  What does it do to people?  maybe if I could understand how it could be so incredibly harder and worse than  he ever expected I would not be as upset.  I do appreciate your comments though. I guess I need to see how he's strong in this and not just trying to take the easiest way out.  HIs Dad was in the Navy and is having a hard time understanding.

[windowartist]

I told him today to read everything carefully and not sign anything lightly.  They did not explain anything to him after he mentioned he felt depressed.  No explanation of consequences if he continues down that road of talk..... he was just moved to ship 5.  I just don't understand how his attitude can change so drastically in 3 weeks there?  He wanted this SO much.  I am wondering if he is being told the whole truth about things because he said they said he would be given a plane ticket home but I'm reading it is usually a bus so I'm confused about that.  Was yours a medical separation?  He said it is better in Ship 5 than before though.

[momofcct]

is that "person" self-absorbed or what????

[momofcct]

oh so true. my son is on ship 5 for the lamest reason possible. i'm sickened.

[Debbie White]

My son went through the same thing and if your son gets an RE4 it is a real pain to try and change it.  Ship 5 is such a bad place for someone in this situation.  They get to the point where they will sign anything just to get home.  My son wants nothing to do with the Navy or any other branch of the service now.  He was in Navy JROTC for four years and wanted to make a career of the Navy.

He was in ship 5 for one and half months.  I wish they would change things so that someone who gets down or home sick doesn't get label as depressed.  They put a kid in a place that at one of the worse times in their lifes that does nothing to support them.  They are scared and just want to go home.  The only future they think about is being far away from Ship 5.

[momofcct]

it's something most ppl cannot wrap their heads around. they screwed my son. i hope i get my "son" back. he's on ship 5 and i've hired a civilian mil.lawyer to handle things from here on out for him, as i don't trust any of those "people" at great lakes! pls. Rosemama, don't ever let your son see this:" I thought he was tougher than this and his Dad and I are really disappointed." this is a serious emotional trip and we are all human. this is about "them"...the recruits, our sons, etc...not about "us". he IS tough. in many ways you could never even imagine.