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Hoping it gets easier!
I have not been able to post on this site until today as didn't want to face the reality that the day was getting closer. But, reality set in and we said goodbye to my son yesterday. Have been crying for weeks so yesterday was full of more tears but also the very proud feelings that come with being a Military Mom. It helps that he was so excited and so very happy in his decision but is tearing at my heartstrings every time I see something of his in the house. I'm hoping the rawness eases a bit with time but it will not be an easy 10 weeks! Thank you for all of yours tips, encouraging words, etc - I will now be a daily visitor to this site!
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by partyofseven on
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Good Morning Mainelyreds,
It is so good to see you on here and that you found us. You can also comment on the comment wall of the boot camp moms group. You will find this all the way past the discussion links and keep going until you see the comment wall block.
I am a mom that helps out on here and mine has been in for 3 plus years. The first couple of weeks of no communication is the hardest. I always recommend to our new moms that keeping busy is key. Do what you like the best and start writing now. I wrote mine twice a day, I think it was for me just as much as it was for him. Know that they are missing you as much as we miss them. When you receive your form letter than you will be able to send off those letters that you have been writing. :)
Boot camp is as much as for us as it is for them while they are in training we are too. It is preparing us for times of silence and for when they go out into the fleet.
You will make it thru this and you will be stronger for it. You will find that as days go by that you made it thru the day without crying :) and then there will be days when your navy mom allergies will attack you at the slightest thing. That's what we call them when we start crying when something reminds us of our loved one.
Feel free to comment on the wall anytime you are ready. That is what we are here for to offer you encouragement, support, and to let you know that it will be ok.
Big Navy Mom hugs to you!!!!
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Permalink Reply by B'sNukeMoM⚓️MMN(Vet) on
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Hang in there! You'll get through this, we'll make sure of it. And count Friday's not individual days. That helps the time go by faster ;-D
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Permalink Reply by belovedbyHim on
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Welcome!! Please read my blog to give you an idea of what the first few weeks may look like.. First Things First-- The Quarantine Edition Up and to the Left is a link to all the Navy Lingo! It is titled Navy Speak and you can find it here. We are here to get you through the “Great Silence” of the next 4 weeks (ish) and the 10 weeks of BC (ish). You will come to learn that No News Is GOOD News and everything is Needs of the Navy. You life will be Hurry Up and Wait and it’s ok to make plans but they are subject to change until after they have happened so it’s best to embrace the Motto: Semper Gumby!! (Always Flexible!!)
The Expected timeline will look like this
Day 0 -- Travel, Arrival and "I'm Here" scripted phone call
Day 1-14 -- ROM (Restriction of Movement/ Quarantine-- Lots of studying and waiting)
Day 15-21 Arrive Onboard RTC and begin P-days (P-days- Initial Processing Days) including 2 days of P-hold (Weekend)
Day 21-- Complete P days. (Initial PFT & Run)
Day 22-- Begin training and mail form letter out. Look for it to arrive around 1-2 weeks later)
All of this is assuming no exposure to COVID with additional ROM
Training typically occurs Monday - Friday but we have heard rumors that Saturday’s are now training days as well.
Normal PIR will be 10 Fridays after departure from Home but it can be less by 1 but it can be extended by ???? (lots!!) It just depends on how many times they get caught in the “Ring of Fire” but do not get COVID. IF they get COVID, Once they are recovered they will not be removed from training again even if they are in the “Ring of Fire”. (so there is that small silver lining if kids get sick)
I Hope you’ll come and join us on the Main Boot Camp Moms page: https://navyformoms.ning.com/group/bootcampmoms You may have to scroll down a ways to reach the comments but we’d love to get to know you and answer any questions or concerns you may have or just be a support from others who “get it”.I know you said you couldn't face this earlier and that is fine just know that there will be stuff that we suggest you do before they ship out listed on the blog. DO NOT beat yourself up over those missed items. You may not have been ready or able to face them and that is OK. I was a hot teary mess when my sailor left just a month after graduating High school. That was nearly 8 years ago. It never gets easier but you do get stronger and the raw heartache will subside. I can now go a whole day and only think of him once ;). Please feel free to post this and any other comments on the Main BC page. We are happy to help you and just know you are not alone. You are NOT crazy, and we haven't lost a mom to Boot camp... We won't start with you!!
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Thank you all so much - it truly does help already to know there are lots of Moms that are going thru or have gone through the same thing! The timeline is so very helpful as my son was somewhat vague with the exact length of some of the processes. I did use your very helpful list of things to do prior to him leaving so thank you for those tips - they were a life saver!
He actually was able to call this afternoon and chat for a few minutes as they were just sitting at the airport so that was a bonus - I will take anything I can get at this point!
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If he is in route to GL Now Call him!!! You want to visit as long as you can once he lands in Chicago since that phone call will have to last you both quite a while!! You got this Momma and He will be looked after even though your heart may not agree just yet!! I also encourage you to come to the Main page (You may have to scroll all the way down to get there) and chat with the moms there too! Just take it one day/hour/minute at a time!!
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Permalink Reply by Chipmunk on
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Mainelyreds - Glad to see that you are getting connected with the group!!! Cherish any of those calls you can get from the airport. The "I'm Here" call is a scripted call. I thought it was a recording, it didn't even sound like my son and it came very late in the evening / early in the morning, so keep your phone next to you if you go to bed.
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The scripted call came in at 1:30 AM to his girlfriend, which I knew was the plan. She texted me as soon as she got it and we spent some time being sad that it was the last call but also felt relieved to know that he had arrived at his destination. Was able to talk and text several times yesterday from the airports, etc. so that was a bonus! Now, the waiting begins...
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Mainelyreds,
I am so glad the call came in and you got to talk to him before he left on the plane. Yes and a good bonus too. :)
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Permalink Reply by DsMom2020 on
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Chipmunk - I love that you said that MainleyReds should not beat herself up for missing the info about what too do before boot camp!!
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And don't forget to update your profile page to read "at bootcamp now".
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Hi mainlyreds,
my son left for Boot Camp in August and I remember feeling exactly how you feel now. The first three weeks were the toughest. Every room I went into seem to have some thing that was his and would make me cry. I spent three weeks putting all of his things away to lessen the pain of the constant reminder he was gone. And then I built him a shrine!! In the family room I devoted the sofa table to him. It’s full of photographs from his going away party and family shots we took right before he went. It has some cute navy decorations I found at hobby lobby. I have several navy blue candles (Amazon) - that one lights when they feel the sailors going through a challenging time. I actually had those all over the house and at work. Because I was having a challenging time missing him so much. I made an anchor that would normally have been put on our hotel room door when we went to visit him at graduation from Boot Camp. I knew there would be no graduation for us to attend but I made the anchor anyway. I bought the cutest navy nutcracker at hobby lobby. Anyway it’s just funny that I spent three weeks putting his things away because they were painful to look at just to build a shrine that brings me such joy. Just know that it does get easier and your pride grows and grows as they succeed on their journey. The navies been so good for my son and I’ve watched him mature and he’s so happy. My son used to come home from college about an hour away every three weeks so I could do his laundry. I filed his taxes. I opened his online banking account. I helped him with his deposit. I enabled him and did everything for him. And now he does it all on his own. My little boy is growing up and I don’t know that he could’ve done it if it stayed home or near home.I love the man he’s becoming. We brought him up right but the Navy is responsible for helping him become independent and mature. I wish you the same experience our families having.
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Thank you so much for your inspiring words - so good to hear about your son and how happy and mature he is thanks to the Navy. That makes me happy, too! I am hoping for the same as my son has always wanted this - he wanted it right out of high school but I talked him out of it. Told him to go to college first and then when he was 4 years older and more mature, if he still wanted this, then he was good to go! And, he decided it was something he still wanted to do. He actually told me before he left that he was very happy that I talked him out of the first round as he feels he is so much more ready, has been crazy training for a year and still feels it is something he needs and wants to do! That is my saving grace...every time I worry, I remember he is a man now and I know I have raised him well enough to make solid, informed decisions for his own happiness. I will follow your suggestions and continue to put the day to day stuff away but keep out some meaningful mementos so that he is always with us! Didn't know about the blue candle, either - working on that!
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