I HAVE TO VENT!!!

[Shoes2BHappy]

I know that patience is a virtue, but I've run out of it! Our son shipped out on the 30th.. I've been waiting on his form letter, and I know that that could take up to two weeks, but here's the frustrating part..

His recruiting officer is nowhere to be found. When he first enlisted, he was working with a certain recruiter. A couple of weeks before he was to ship out, his recruiter went back to another job, and he was assigned to another. 

He never even met the new recruiter (since it was so close to the time that he was leaving), and on the day before he shipped out, when we went to sign the last few papers and check in, he wasn't there. 

I've noticed that a lot of mom's find out their son's divisions, etc., before they even receive the form letter, and they find out from their son's recruiter.. I called the MEPS office where he shipped out from, and they were so nice, but they don't handle that side of it there. The gentleman I spoke with said he would look into it, and try and find out what he could, but I know they're extremely busy there. 

I know that eventually I'll get the form letter, but it's frustrating that we don't have a recruiter that we could call, even with a minor question. It looks as though his PIR would be July 26th, but who knows??

OK, rant over..I just pray that all is ok w/ my "boy", and that the letter will come soon! (and I'd also like to make our flight and hotel reservations!) 

I hope everyone is having a good Tuesday!! 

[Shoes2BHappy]

Hurry up and wait, and no news is good news.. my new mantra!! 

[belovedbyHim]

Shoes2BeHappy-- That used to make me crazy too!! I sent my First born off to college, She didn't like it/ know what she wanted to do so she moved to CA on her own for 2 years before my Sailor left for BC... IT WAS NOTHING like that.  I took her to both College and CA (LA specifically) and left her in both places with less tears (not none but less) and less worry and apprehension than I did my middle son!   The difference... Communication!  I called her or texted nearly EVERY DAY for the first few weeks to see how she was, If she needed anything, How were things going..... But Boot Camp-- Hugs and an INSANELY robotic "I'm Here" call.... Then NOTHING!!! No letters, calls, texts.... Just crickets, tears and silence!! My DH was in the Navy during Dessert Storm so I knew the very real possibilities that my kid had signed up for and in all that silence that was at the forefront of my mind!  It was So HARD!!
HOWEVER.... We have it easier than our moms, Grandmoms & Great- GrandMoms!!! They had Snail mail or if they were lucky a phone call or 2 and that was it!! Often times their children were Drafted and we were in a state of Serious War (WWI, WWII, Vietnam, Korea) where so many, many more were facing much worse than I pray for our kids to ever have to face!! As hard as BC is it is the only time in their entire Naval career that you will know exactly where they are and exactly (more or less) What they are doing Every day!! Even A-school doesn't have that security!   Deep Breaths and Repeat after me.... "No News is Good News..... No News is Good News.... No News Is Good News.... NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS....." (repeat as needed until your heart and head are in agreement!!)

[Shoes2BHappy]

Great point about the advantage we will have regarding communication with our children vs our parents and their parents.. You all have made me feel a lot better. 

[Tammy⚓️Girl]

It's funny we are having a discussion about recruiters.  Just this past weekend I asked my son (his PIR was 12/14/18) if he ever heard from his recruiter since he left ... and he said no.  I said that's odd.  And he said "no, not really, his only job was to make sure I got to the Great Lakes."

[Molly's Proud Mom]

EXACTLY TammyGirl! Your son's a bright one. The recruiter has one job to do. When our SRs sign on the line, their job is really finished. They really don't have up to date info on them when they arrive at Great Lakes, so you could get misinformation. If it helps, when my mom died, we called the recruiter first to ask how to get in touch with Molly, and he never answered. Ah well.

[Shoes2BHappy]

Seriously? Wow..

[belovedbyHim]

Ok While we are on the subject.... All BC Moms, Go Get your cell phones and put in this information....

Red Cross Emergency Communication
1-877-272-7337

You will also need the following information (I put it in the "Notes" section of the contact  in my phone so I don't have to think about where it is)

• Full legal name

• Rank/rating

• Branch of service (Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, Coast Guard)

• Social Security number or Date of Birth

• Military unit address

• Information about the deployed unit and home base unit (for deployed service members only)

So for Bootcamp it would look like:
Seaman Recruit LastName, FirstName
USNavy
SSN123-45-6789
ShipXX, DIVXX,
Great Lakes, Illinois
U.S. Navy Recruit Training Command

You will want to update this info regularly as your sailor progresses through their Naval career.  I pray you never Ever need it but if something happens and you do, you will not have to think about what info you need or where it is.  You will also need to know what the emergency is and where it can be verified (hospital, doctors office, funeral home...). The Red Cross does not authorize emergency leave. Their role is to independently verify the emergency, enabling the service member’s commander to make an educated decision regarding emergency leave and then to provide transportation assistance and/or financial assistance if needed. They facilitate emergency financial assistance on behalf of Military Aid Societies. These Aid Societies determine the financial assistance package that will be offered – a grant or a loan. The Red Cross is the mechanism to expedite access to these financial resources 24/7.

[Tammy⚓️Girl]

Molly's Proud Mom - wow, that’s some story.  

[rf144]

Most recruiters are done with the recruit once they ship. Their job is done. As you've found out, MEPS doesn't handle anything past processing. Don't bother to try to contact the recruiter. Any information he may have will not necessarily be correct. Things change.

You won't get the form letter until he passes the PFA, usually on P Day 5. He's only been gone 12 days. Sign up for Informed Delivery through the post office. It's free, and you will see what mail you're getting before it arrives. Write letters in the meantime, so you can mail them as soon as you get the address.

Go on Facebook and search for a great group, Navy Recruit Training Command Boot Camp and Beyond. The admins have done a wonderful job accumulating info in the attached Files that tells you all you need to know. It's a great support group, like this one.

It's easy for me to say stop worrying; my daughter graduated 2/8 (super cold) and has been at her base almost 2 months. But remember this: he is safe. You don't have to worry about him driving around, not knowing where he is, etc. I was only worried about her passing the run. Other than that, I knew she was okay, and I would hear from her when she did. I had 10 letters ready to mail when I got the form letter. Innocuous stuff, daily monotony, and pictures of the cats, printed as collages on paper.

So, say prayers that he passes the PFA, write letters, and occupy your time. Binge watch some shows, take up a hobby, focus on work, whatever you need to do. But don't stress unless/until there is something to stress about. He is working hard, learning a lot, getting three squares a day, and may be sleep deprived, but he is fine. And learning to curse excessively!

[Shoes2BHappy]

@rf144 I definitely get it about the recruiters, their job is done once the recruits ship out. I was just seeing a lot of "we asked our recruiter..." comments on this site, so I was venting that we don't have a recruiter to ask anything to, even if he WERE to ignore us! hahaha And fortunately, I don't have to worry about the PFA. With his job, he had to secure that beforehand, so we are good in that aspect of it. 

I don't want you all to think that I'm curled in a ball crying on the floor! I know everything will be alright, and I know I'll get the letter. It's psychological for me. Like, once I get the form letter, a "real" letter won't be too far off, and then a phone call should come after that..etc. That's how I'm playing it out in my head, if that makes sense. Bottom line, the not talking to him is the hardest for me, for all of us in our family. Even when he was away at college, we talked/texted everyday, multiple times a day, so I think that's what really bothering me. I know I'll have to get used to this change. 

And believe me, I'm quite busy. A husband, three other children, a dog, and a new house, that we moved into the DAY after watching our son ship off, whew!! Definitely enough to help pass the time, but still running to the mailbox everyday at 3pm! :) And my doctor keeps me in the right frame of mind too, my doctor, "Marcus", Dr. "Neiman Marcus".. shopping has ALWAYS been my therapy!! :)

I really appreciate the insight you all haven given, and it DID help to vent on this site. So many of the comments gave me a chuckle. 

One thing that gives me huge peace of mind is knowing that this has been our son's road since he was a young boy. Even in college he knew that he was going to do this, so I take comfort in the belief that he's where he's supposed to be, even if it's a little tough on his dad and me (and his siblings). I am for sure of the mind set that no news is good news, thanks to all of you!! But boy, I sure do hope that form letter comes today ;)

Have a great hump day!!

[Pinkpony]

Mine left on 5/29 and no form letter yet either. I’m anxious to make reservations too. Mine is in 800’s division but I don’t think that has anything to do with it.

[Shoes2BHappy]

@Pinkpony same here regarding division. Like everyone said, hurry up and wait. Maybe tomorrow will be our day, fingers crossed!!