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Bursting with pride BUT.........
This is my first post.
First let me say, I am so proud of the choice my son has made. He's going to be a Sailor!! I know the first time I see him all "Navy'ed" up in his uniform and hair cut my heart will just burst with pride.
He is my youngest. When he leaves for BC I will be alone. My husband left us 2 years ago now. My soon to be sailor and I grew very close after his sister left home almost 6 years ago and only got closer after the not so DH left. I am very, very happy for him and the decision he has made. When he talks about his future plans and what the Navy will do for him, he gets SO excited and that brings me so much JOY....
now the BUT...
I am afraid. I am afraid that I will just fall apart once he is gone. The last 33 years of my life has been all about raising kids and working to support them. I've been their mom, their scout leader and for a good portion of their life I was their Sunday school teacher as well. When my husband left, we moved to another city (we lived in his hometown) and I don't know anyone here. I don't really have any friends close to where I live or work. I'm sure I'm not the only mom to have faced this before and I would greatly appreciate hearing from any that have "been there, done that" and thrived!!
Respectfully,
Lady Pendragon
Views: 650
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by orpy on
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How are you today? My daughter leaves tomorrow...but goes to the hotel first tonight. I'm heart-sick...this was a decision she made fairly quickly and very uncharacteristic of her. I know she has to go to have an exciting life...I feel lost...and I work fulltime in a career that has always interested me but now I feel like what's the point.
Does it get better? How do I cope? I know others do NOT relate to me; my sister said she can't relate and acts like there's something wrong with me. I know it's a true stage and my feelings are legitimate.
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Permalink Reply by CO-TwinSalorsMom on
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Absolutely they are true feelings and normal. It does get better, however goodbyes are always tough. Also when they get busy with something or are on deployment and are running silent due to the nature of their job. Then you don't hear from them for awhile and that is tough. You do make it through, I try to keep busy. Have almost repainted my whole house. LOL and you count the days till you get to see them.
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Permalink Reply by Griffins mom on
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Hi Ladypendragon, I know some if what you are going through. My youngest who is also a twin has been in bootcamp since September 16th. And I got my first letter today! Hooray!! My wonderful SR. is doing great and I know your son will do wonderful in bootcamp as well. We are all here to support and comfort. It's hard when all the kids are off living their own lives, as for me I have been extremely lost and can't seem to focus on anything. But perspective is slowly creeping back in and knowing that my son is so happy with his decision to join the Navy just fills my heart with relief and pride. Hang in there we are all here for you.
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Hey Griffins and Ladypendragon,,, Have wither of you joined the Twins and multiples in the navy group? I have twins and an on that group.
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My one and only child just left for boot camp yesterday and I'm a total mess today. I know it will get easier, but I totally didn't expect it to be this hard.
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Permalink Reply by B'sNukeMoM⚓️MMN(Vet) on
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Jaysmom - hang in there! I don't know that it ever gets easier LOL, but we are all here for you!
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To those of you with your first goodbyes. I think it does get easier day to day. I know more what to expect now after two years at this. Goodbyes do not get better. Hello's are pretty great though.
I, at the start of this journey, Cried EVERY day. Then it was not quite every day. Now just out of the blue for no real reason, Hard this week even though my son is home. He is struggling with the house being packed up as I am moving from the only home he ever knew. He daily says, "why do you have to leave? This is hard to see it so empty"
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Permalink Reply by Texasmom on
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Lady pendragon, wow. I Sooo feel Sooo much of what you shared. Perhaps we shud keep each other company. Ha. Wow. It is so encredibly bitter sweet isn't it. Our kids growing up, heading out to live their lives, becoming soldiers! ! But ooh the stretching aND pulling at our hearts and emotions. They've been our all. It just makes me tear up, and sob, too often
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Texasmom - welcome to our group! This post by Lady pendragon was back in early 2014 and I haven't seen her around here since so she may not respond. But that's ok 'cuz we are all here for you! Pop on over to the main Emptynester page and introduce yourself & join in..... ;-)
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Permalink Reply by momto navymat on
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My youngest is leaving as well. Although dad is in our lives, he is at work a lot so I can feel where you are coming from but in a little bit of a different way. My two oldest just moved out of state so I have been a mess. No more babies here. :( Feel free to friend me, we can chat anytime.
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As stated,this is an old post. My sailor went to boot camp in 2014. He's my oldest grandson who I raised alone from the day after his 2nd birthday until the day he left for boot camp.
All I can say is thank goodness for the dog, lol. It's been an incredible adjustment. All I can recommend is that you make an effort to engage in activities that interest you other than work. Don't forget self care. Mourn the closing of a chapter in your life,celebrate the new chapter beginning for you both. Cry when you need to, treasure whatever communication you can have before PIR, and look forward to having a son who will be even more of an adult than when he left. -
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