Deployments???

[RobsPrincess12]

My fiancé and I are will be celebrating his graduation on 12/28/12 and, shortly after that, our wedding. He will then be leaving for A School and the learning about his first deployment. I plan on moving with him but I am worried about how much time I will spending alone in a new place where I don't know anyone and have nothing to do but worry about my husband (because I do that a lot anyway). . He is going to be a Yoeman (I think that's what it's called) and was told that he won't be going out to sea much. does anyone know how much time a Yoeman stays away from the base?

[Jenn_NicksWifey]

He won't be learning about his first deployment at A School.  He'll learn how to do the job, then towards the end of A School, he'll get his first orders.  Once he finds out where he's going, he may be able to have an idea of when he'll deploy.  Depending on what ship he's assigned to, there may be a tentative deployment scheduled.  The ship or as in my husband's case, the unit, will be listed on his orders.  You will be able to seek out other spouses of that ship and find out a lot more about the deployment rotation.  Nothing is written in stone, of course, but it'll give you a better idea. 

There's really no way to determine for sure what to expect until you get to his first duty station and he checks in.  We got to my husband's first duty station in Oct and he was told they'd deploy next year for 6 months and going to these places.  Now the timeline is different, the places they are going is different and the date they're leaving is different.  Plus its still not finalized, lol.  You'll just have to roll with it and keep an open mind.  If you live in military housing, there are LOTS of other spouses around to get to know.  If you want to work, that will be an avenue to meet people and there are lots of military spouse/family activites planned.  If you get out there and try to meet people, you will and you'll be less lonely if he does deploy.  The Navy does try to make sure the families are taken care of. 

My hubby's unit is going to deploy next year, but then probably won't deploy again until well after his contract is up.  So we just have to deal with duty days where he has to spend the night on the craft every 8 days, maybe more during Christmas stand down, but for the most part, he's home every night.  His craft started something called InServe right after he got there, which required a lot of "late" nights, so he was home by 6:30 those nights.  Basically, they overhauled and painted the whole craft.  It's over now, so he expects to be getting home by like 4 every day.  He'll be gone for 6 months, which will suck, but I have some projects planned to keep me busy for then. 

I hope that helps and sets your mind at ease a little, even though it's just a lot of hurry up and wait.  Feel free to pm me if you want. 

Jenn.

[meagan5220]

Are yall trying to get married on PIR weekend?? Does he know if he will be there long enough to get it all done?

 

NicksWifey is correct when she says you will get orders typically towards the end of deployment. At which point you can figure out what his command is and his sponsor might tell him the schedule or if they are out to sea he can get flown out upon checking in. They have yeoman on the ships and whatnot too I am pretty sure. I know my husband has told me things he has done during the day on the ship while deployed and they included yeoman. So with that being said, if he gets assigned to a ship then yes he can and will be deployed. I just looked up the sea/shore rotation and while it seems they are one of the few rates that has a longer shore rotation than sea, he will probably get sea first, thats just typically how it goes.

 

So to answer your question about how long he would be away.. it depends. All ships are different. For example my husband and his friend graduated a school about the same time. within a month of each other that was in May 2011. So my husband got sent to a ship that deployed about 6 months later and returned this august after an 8 month deployment. Her husband has not even gone on a deployment at all. He will early next year and be gone for most of the year and then come back and shortly go back out for another. While my husband will not be deployed with his ship before his enlistment is up. Now they might call him out to another ship but they told him they probably wont. Idk how they decide if they get on a sub or not but some of the subs have different schedules as well.

 

As far as moving somewhere that you dont know anyone.. thats sort of part of the life. It sucks but you meet new people, learn your way around, and find something to do to pass the time. If you have nothing to do all the time its because you allow that to happen. You can volunteer, get a job, meet new people, set up a house, finish projects, and so much more. Dont worry its not really life ending to have to move and be alone. You can visit home, you can stay there the whole time. Its really a new adventure and full of possibilities and if you look at it that way it will be a lot better! I moved over to VA all alone during deployment.. the closest people I knew that I was really close with both lived about 45 minutes away. Then one friend moved over here but she lived 30 minutes away with no traffic so I was sort of in my own little world here lol. It wasnt horrible.

[heathee12]

my boyfriend and I are getting married on 12/28 and he is a yeoman. if you have any questions feel free to ask. he will go to school in MS and it is a pretty intense schedule. it is supposed to be self-paced so if he works hard he can finish a little faster by going to night and wkend classes. it took my bf 7 wks to do the program. the cell service is terrible there - so expect lots of dropped calls. I wouldn't move there for that program - wait until he gets his first duty station. :)

[RobsPrincess12]

I guess because I'm kind of a "shy" person, Im kinda fearful of the whole thing but I love my fiancé more than I fear this situation.. So I'm moving lol. I was just hoping that he would be around to help me settle in, I guess. Whatever I have to do is what will be done though. Thank you all for your comments. They really do make me feel better and more prepared for the military life.

[meagan5220]

Dont worry about being shy :) It can make it a little bit harder sometimes but you will run into wives like me that are far from shy lol. I am very outgoing and was always trying to organize get togethers and introducing new wives to each other. lol Especially if I thought they would click. When you find out his command you can look up a few things to help you out. First off look for a family readiness group. This is for social events for the command. Like my FRG does a playdate once a month for the kiddos and parents to meet up. And they do fundraisers, also a great way to volunteer and stay in the loop a little bit. Then there are ombudsmans at most every command as far as I know. They are a liason between the families and the command. They also are involved in FRG meetings usually and stuff like that. And then last but not least look up COMPASS courses online. They are classes held every so often that introduce you to the Navy and the area but its also a great chance to meet new wives in your same situation but also meet older wives that are teaching or taking the class again to learn new things!

 

Also, you will find a lot of the bases have facebook pages and groups so that is another way to meet new people. You can talk to them on facebook before meeting them. Just make sure you meet people in public at least the first few times when you are getting a feel for them ya know?

 

Typically (not always because it does happen sometimes where you will hear about people doing things themselves), they give time to set up and whatnot with their families.

[sailorwifenmom]

Also keep in mind, in the civilian community, in a lot of ways, it's harder to make new friends, because a lot of times you sort of already know everyone and have your group, so you don't really think about those not in your social group, or, if you are, they aren't really thinking about you. It's not a bad thing, just everyone has their own network and routines.

BUT - in the military world, we've ALL been "the new kid" the majority of us are not from wherever it is we're currently living, and we know that because we move so much, we heed to put down our roots and grow - no time for "lets give it a year of living next door, maybe saying hi, before we invite each other over for a bbq (if you ever do...)". We know that we are all in the same boat, so we need each other. And the Navy knows this, too, so they do all sorts of things like Family Support Groups, play groups for parents and kids, classes - either college ones on base or classes like zumba at the gym or ceramics or stained glass or wood working at arts and hobbies, parenting, budgeting, and house buying through Fleet and Family, or volunteering on base - all ways to meet other spouses and build a network of other people who understand and are going through it too or who have been there, done that and understand how it feels.

There are a lot of opportunities, you just have to reach out a little bit for them :-)

[sailorwifenmom]

Oh - and if you get a chance once you're at your first duty station, take a COMPASS class. It's free and can REALLY help you understand and navigate being a Navy spouse, with a lot of realistic tips on things like deployments, pcsing, etc.