Having a hard time

[kcowdin]

Hey there,
My Sailor and I are engaged and we are going to be married on the 7th of September so I'm wondering if any of you all can give me an idea of how long it takes for BAH to come through. Also I am trying to prepare all of our things for our future moves. I'm not sure where to start so I wonder if there are any of you ladies that have suggestions or techniques for packing and moving.
While I am asking questions, does the goodbye ever get easier?
Thank you so much!

[beachmom76]

@kcowdin

Congratulations on your upcoming wedding! I married my sailor on September 6th, way back in 1983, so we are closing fast on our 30th anniversary. The following link should have answers to a lot of the questions you have, plus links to the programs and services available for military spouses. http://tinyurl.com/NewSpouseOrientation

Military OneSource has a great page on military moves. You can create a calendar, research bases and get loads of advice on prepping for a move. http://www.militaryonesource.mil/moving

For packing and moving: if the Navy is moving you, they pack everything (including trash cans so be sure to empty them! lol); they will take apart your beds and tables; I recommend letting them do this because they have to reassemble anything they disassemble. This way you can have them put your furniture back together when you arrive at your new home. When the movers come, be sure to have one space (bathroom, closet) clearly marked DO NOT PACK and stash in there everything you want to carry with you when you move.  I put all our important papers, my jewelry, laptop and any clothes I need for the move.If you have a cat, keep it in a crate or ask a neighbor to keep it until the packers are done. More than once, cats have climbed into a box and made the move packed away.

If you know where you are going, you can start researching housing and the local community. I always liked to find out things to do in my new location so I could get excited about the move. After 18 moves, it became pretty routine!

As far as the separation getting easier...for me, it did.  The first one was awful; we had just moved from the east coast to San Francisco and I knew no one. Hubby deployed on a submarine for six months. Back then we had NO contact. I stayed in our apartment for two weeks and cried the whole time. The neighbors thought I was dead. Eventually, I found a job, made friends and pulled myself out of the pit. After that, while I still missed him terribly, I knew I could manage alone. Knowing that made the separations much less stressful for me and for him. Even though being apart was not as bad as the first time, Homecoming is ALWAYS the best day ever! That never changes; even after 30 years.

Good luck to you and congratulations again on your wedding!

[Angie]

Where is your Sailor at now?  School or a command??  Reason I am asking if if they get their orders to a command before you are married the Navy will not move you! Also if they get orders over seas, you will not be going with them. 

As far as goodbyes getting easier, mine did also.  It took time, but you need to do things for yourself!  You need to get a job, and or a hobby so you stay busy and don't just sit at home and cry all the time. 

[kcowdin]

Thank you both for the advice!
He is actually in "A" school right now. I definitely have a lot to do to keep myself busy, I am currently in my last few months of school to get my degree for OT. It is just one of those things, I'm sure I will acclimate eventually, and I have only had a homecoming situation 1 time, but it is amazing!