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Help a friend!
Good Morning Ladies..
Well, this isn't about me.. but, I do need some advice/help..
My roommate/co-worker's boyfriend is a Marine and he will be going overseas for 3 yrs..
She has never been through a deployment, so I know this is going to be hard for her...
She thinks joining these sites are "lame".. So, trying to get her to join is out of the question..
Plus she doesn't open up about how she feels about this but last night she started telling me how she can't believe that he's really leaving for 3 yrs and she probably won't see him unless she's able to travel to see him..
Later on that night they were skyping and after they got off she told me "I guess this is what i'll have to be doing from now on." I said "yes.. welcome to my life... it's not easy but now you have me to help you out".
She's a really strong girl but I know this is going to get to her.. as strong as she may seem she needs to open up a bit more about this..
So.. I just need to know if any of you lady have ever had a hard time opening up or talking about deployment or if you know anyone that's like my roommate and how ya'll helped her?
Views: 43
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by My Sailor's Anchor on
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It seems she's in my favorite stage...denial.
Even after my husband left I was in a state of denial for a good two weeks before i finally broke down. I think the best you can do is to be there for her when that happens. There's also a great audio book or pdf download for a book called These Boots for free on Military1Source...and that has been a great help for me to adjust to what i'll be facing being married to the Navy.
At least she has someone close who knows what it feels like to be a military spouse to support her...best of luck for both of you!
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I fully understand from both sides...since during the first deployment, everyone tried to get me to open up and talk it out or even cry it out but i honestly wasn't ready for that stage. i guess i wanted to just pretend nothing happened for as long as i can and being a strong independent person, it was harder for me to let others know that him leaving was so hard for me...almost like admitting i had a weakness (as strange as that is)
so after a couple of attempts from friends to drag me out of my house to trying to get me drunk to start talking, they let me have some breathing space until i finally broke down and couldn't deny it any longer. a few of my friends noticed the change in me and when they offered me help this time around i was ready to receive it (along with the coffee and cake) and be comforted.
now i'm in my 4th deployment and it does get better and somewhat easier to transition but i think it's more due to the fact that i know what to expect now. But i am so thankful for my friends who were there just keeping me company (and im sure betting on the side how long it'd take before i start bawling)
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