New Navy Wife! What to expect? Hubby leaves for RTC in 2 weeks.

[alyssaleanne(ship03div401)]

Hello everyone (:

 

My hubby leaves for RTC in 2 weeks (Aug 21st) and I was wondering what your best tips are for preparing and surviving bootcamp are. What are the most important things to do before and during his training? Thank you!!

[Navy Wife (Div 321)]

Hey Alyssa,

WElcome my husband is in Boot camp right now he graduates Aug 30th, first of all the first week was the hardest now the time is slowly flying by but its better now just counting down the days. He got called to leave for boot camp two days before he left so it was kinda short notice because he wasnt suposet to leave till SEptemeber but thejob he wanted opened up so he had to leave in two days, so at leavst you get some time with him knowing he will be leaving just make sure to spend time with him hug and kiss everyday bc that is what i miss also. Just take the time to make sure to go over your finances and get all that together and stuff but it will be okay im in the same boat and we have a little so if you have any questions at all or need suport im here and on here all the time so feel free to ask away hope this helps :)

[UrabissWife]

hey girl, tell you husband to take a piece of paper and a pen with him for his flight to RTC, then he can write you a little note and tell him to stuff it deep in his pocket. that way when he mails his clothes home you will have a little note from him. it will help so much. I wish someone told me to do this when my husband left, it would have been so nice. and he can just leave his pen on the airplane :) . write letters every day. I wrote from the day I dropped my husband off. so when it was time to send out letters, I sent quite a few. but he really enjoyed them. i also sent a picture or two with each letter. and he came home will all the pictures. he said it was great to have so when he opened up his bunk he could see me :)

[Jenn_NicksWifey]

There are a lot of "comfort" things to do to keep you from feeling sad, but there are a lot of "business" things to do, too. 

1.  If you don't have a joint account for everything, either get your name on everything or get a power of attorney.  You will not be able to reach him while he's gone.  His calls will be random, rare and time limited. 

2.  Make sure he has the checking account number and bank routing number.  You can send a voided check with him so he can get his check deposited.  If he doesn't have the account number, he will open a new checking account with Navy Fed and you will not have access to it. 

3.  Find a bootcamp day by day description so you can read - together - what he'll be doing and discuss anything that comes up.  He'll have the chance to order graduation photos, a year book, apparel (other than the uniform stuff).  My husband was offered a chance to go to the Honor Guard, which would have been a totally different assignment than we were thinking.  Talk about everything that will come up and what you want to do "if". 

4.  Save money.  His first paycheck will likely be held.  The military pays on the 1st and 15th of the month.  If he leaves on August 21, he may not get paid until the 15th of Sept.  Make sure you have a plan for paying bills, putting gas in the car, groceries, etc for that time.  Also, his first check will have deductions for uniforms, toiletries, etc in them.  He'll have to buy everything from underwear to deodorant and a razor.  He won't be allowed to keep anything from home except his wallet and retainer (my DH has one and was allowed to use it while in BC).  They ship back his clothes, phone, everything.  I would suggest him going with a fake wallet or none at all.  My hubby took his regular wallet.  Well, RTC reeks.  He's been out of RTC for just over a year, and I can still smell that smell on his wallet.  When he pulls cash out, I can smell RTC on his money from the smell of his wallet.  And of course, it's leather so we can't wash it.  LoL.  Odd little things stick out. 

5.  Decide if you're going to his graduation - called Pass In Review.  Peruse and find out transportation prices, lodging, etc to see if it's in the budget.  If he's staying at Great Lakes for A School, you may have the weekend to spend with him, although he will have to go back to the barracks each night.  Find out what he may want you to bring.  He can't have a phone while in BC, but once he's checked out of RTC, he can have a phone and laptop, etc.  If he's going to a different A School, you can meet him at the airport and give him his things.  You'll also be allowed to wait with him at the airport.  He will have to get you a gate pass so you can go through security. 

6.  Definitely join the group for his PIR date here on NavyForMoms.  You will get a letter a week or two after he leaves that will tell you the date. Search for a group called "PIR MM/DD/YY", filling in the appropriate date, of course.  There is a Facebook page for people shipping out this month, you and he can join it.  August 2013 Navy Shippers  When my DH went in, he left on 22 May and I joined the May Shippers page.  There were a bunch of loved ones of the recruits on it.  As the recruits who had gone in earlier graduated, they came back and chatted with us.  There also will be a Facebook page for his PIR group and likely for his Ship/Division.  Its just people in the same boat (sorry, pun) as you trying to connect. 

7.  While he's gone, write to him.  Every day.  You will feel closer to him, you will create a diary of your life that he's missing and it will help him feel closer to you when he reads it. 

8.  Always give him the benefit of the doubt while he's there.  He has absolutely no control over his life there.  He gets told what to do and when to do it.  If he can't write, it's not his fault.  If everyone in your PIR group gets phone calls except you, he probably had watch or something.  Never let yourself think that he is doing it on purpose or doesn't love you.  It happens to a lot of significant others while their recruit/sailor is away.  Those thoughts start to creep in when you haven't heard from him in weeks. 

9.  If there are any familial rough patches - MIL doesn't get along with you, your mom doesn't like him, anything - figure it out or have a plan to deal with it before.  I see so many times on some of the Facebook support groups, a guy is in bootcamp, his mom is being a real pain to his wife/gf and she doesn't know how to handle it.  Have him tell his family how it's going to be, who he wants letters from, and you handle your family so life is peachy and less-stressed for you both.  Ask him who he wants you to give his address to.  He should consider carefully because there are certain rules that should be followed when writing to a recruit (no food, no musical stuff, NO GLITTER, that sort of thing) and if some people might not be able to follow those rules, he should understand the consequences - he's not going to get kicked out for getting glitter in his letter, but his whole division might have to help clean the ship with tape to get every speck of glitter up.  That sort of thing. 

I hope that helps.  I'm sure I've missed some stuff, but you'll probably pick it up from your PIR groups. 

[alyssaleanne(ship03div401)]

WOW, thank you SO MUCH, Jen! This was all soooooooooo incredibly helpful. <3 I will definitely consider the advice you gave me. *hugs*