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Comment by arlene40 on May 15, 2010 at 9:02am

CindyH, I am so sorry to hear this about your father and your grandson not being able to be here. I am just wondering if you contacted the Red Cross to get him home. I understood that Grandparents are not considered the immediate family but that if the sailor lets them know the relationship and closeness and their desires that their commander has the choice to let them come home or not. They assured me that if something happened to me that would get my grandson home. I feel so sorry for your son, I know this hurt him very much and it would have been better for him, if he could have come home. You know this has to be down time for him.. I will keep him in my prayers. My nephew who actually retired from service and is now contractor for them, assure me that they would get my grandson home...but it is really left up to the officer in charge at the time etc. But it is all through the red cross. They can helicopter them off the ship to a airbase to come right straight in... Well this breaks my heart for him... of course there was nothing he could do but sit and grieve with you but at lease he would not be by himself grieving. Of course we understand if they cannot get there but my children have been instructed to contact the Red Cross and if they cannot get him if something should happen he will have to live with that just as your son did....but in the meantime, I plan on making the best of every minute that I am alive. God is good to me and He will see us all through these lonely times. My prayers are with you as you are going through this loss of your father.. I lost mine 46 years ago and I still miss him.. The void will always be there. God Bless You is my prayer this day.

Comment by arlene40 on May 15, 2010 at 8:27am

Diannep, Thank you so much for your kind words... This is what helps to make life worth living. God Bless you and you have a wonderful weekend... Arlene

Comment by diannep on May 15, 2010 at 8:21am

Arlene: You sound like one very special grandmother! Oh my! I loved reading this post. How blessed your grandchildren are to have you in their lives...so involved, so loving....so proud. Thank you SO much for sharing this with us. And especially with me! I needed to read these words. You have every right to be so proud of your grandchildren, because their accomplishments are a large part due to YOU! If all of the grandparents in our world were like you, what a much better place we would be in. God Bless You, Arlene. May you live a long and wonderful life and continue to see the wonderful accomplishments of those military grandchildren! Have a wonderful weekend!

Comment by arlene40 on May 14, 2010 at 11:42pm

Oh me, what our children have to go through, growing up and facing this real world. When I saw how they talked to them as they were catching the bus leaving for boot camp, I wanted to go and drag my grandson off the bus. I was so upset, but I smiled and waved bye to him.. It was horrible... I cried all the way home from the base and cried for weeks, lost my eye site and thought they were going to have to put me in a box. He called me from the Airport before taking his flight out assuring me he was okay, he kept saying MeeMaw, I'm okay now, it is going to be alright... I never thought anything thing about this was going to be alright. Here, my grand-daughter had sneaked away and joined, went to boot camp and was almost finished when she called her mom to tell her where she was. She had a 2 year old boy and we were so against her joining, her husband not responsible to raise the child, however she left the boy with him, but anyway, she had been in there exactly one year when my grandson graduated from boot camp. I was so close to my grandson, he had stayed with me much of his life and I could not stand the thoughts of him being mistreated and he had such a tender heart. I finally stopped crying, and I kid you not, I cried for 7 of the 8 weeks of his boot camp. I got sick, had to go to the doctor, caught cold, could not get over it and crying all the same time. Did not know if my nose was dripping from cold or crying. But finally got myself together and went to see him graduate...the most wonderful experience I ever had in my life...but when it was over and we could get to them and hug...here I went... I was actually crying out loud... he hugged me and hugged me and I finally pulled it together again. 3 days and then the goodbyes, cried all night driving home... and I am still crying... I hate my grandchildren being away.. I know and I am proud of them but I had just as soon they had no part of being away from home. Of course I had my oldest grandson finishing up his 2 years in the coast guards... I cried when he left...till I was sick.. I will never get use to them being away from home. I can call my two grandsons right now but when they get on the ship etc we do hear from them but not as much, it is according to where they are if they are allowed to make calls etc. But it has been a rough year... My husband tried to cheer me up with a huge birthday party with over 100 guest showed up.. I loved it and appreciated it but it still did not take the place of my grandchildren being gone... But my grand-daughter is stationed in Norfolk. She has living quarters off the base.. When she first went there she was kinda lost, for her ship had already left out for the middle east and they flew her all over into different countries getting her to her ship. Then she was with the ship about 5 months when they came back home. The Capt of the Ship or what ever he is called, sent out a letter to the parents telling them of all that they had done, their accomplishments etc and when they would be arriving back at Norfolk. They got back the last of Oct and my grandson that is in San Diego now, went with my daughter up to meet the ship, taking her little boy with them. It was exciting. He was able to actually go on her ship and see it all over etc. Because he has high grades he was one of the first to choose where he wanted to be stationed and he chose Norfolk and the same ship she is assigned to. They approved that but then he went back and put in for a package deal to have more school and extending his service time two more years, but a big increase in pay and bonus signing etc. He was waiting to hear if it had been approved. He will be finishing his A school the middle of june and will be home after that for 2 weeks... so he will either go back to San Diego for more school or go to -Norfolk and join my grand-daughter on the James E Williams Fighter ship. Now life must be good for the sailors, if we grandmothers can live through it.. Here I am 70 years old... will probably never live to see them all back home safely, but I am going to try...they just are enjoying it all while I sit here and worry... my grandson really has feelings for me and calls very often... I love my grandchildren... I wish I could afford the trip there without him having to pay my way... So you see,we are all kinda in the same boat... our kids are away, we worry about them, we cry for them and all the time, I guess they are growing up to be wonderful men and women....

Comment by diannep on May 14, 2010 at 11:26pm

Thanks, Justin's mom. He connected with a friend tonight who is at Portsmouth? I think that is what he said...
I'm sure my son doesn't know where the USO is but maybe he will find out next week. He also has no car right now...so that may prove to be a problem for him for a while.But thanks for the info! There is a Subway close by, but he was too afraid to go to it tonight.

Comment by diannep on May 14, 2010 at 7:59pm

Thanks, KYMom: I willl do that.

Comment by diannep on May 14, 2010 at 7:45pm

Steph: Thanks. I'm not on yahoo so can't do that. His fear and unhappiness right now is just breaking my heart...I know he is just scared. He is used to being with lots of buddies at A School, and now he is alone. He said that nothing around him is "Navy." That's because he is housed away from the ship, I'm sure. The sponsor was on duty and that is why he had to leave him. Maybe he will call him later. Luckily, my son connected with a buddy on the Norfolk base and they are hoping to go to the beach on Sunday. Thanks so much for trying to help! Is your sailor on the USS TR? I have found that site to not be active at all. In fact, I think mine may be the last post and it was in early April. I just don't know where to find the TR moms/wives/etc.

Comment by diannep on May 14, 2010 at 7:41pm

MissyMSailor: Thanks so much. Is your son connected to a ship? I don't think this is a hotel that my son is in. He didn't mention anything about a front desk. The USS TR is the Theordore Roosevelt which is in dry dock. That is why he is not living on the ship. He did walk over to the Nex to get some food and a girl there told him that by the ship where they work, there is food (I guess a galley). But she said on the weekend, you are on your own for food. I never met or talked to his recruiter (he joined in another city). My son left him a couple of messages over the past few months, but didn't get a call back. But he heard that he had been promoted and is no longer a recruiter, so that may be the reason why.
So you son lives on Norfolk base? That is what my son was hoping for.
Glad the yours is doing well! And hoping mine will soon. It's been a very tough day...for both of us...and he is worrying this mother's heart...

Comment by MissMySailor on May 14, 2010 at 7:28pm

Hi diannep I know this is a hard time for you and I know how you feel. When my son first arrived he was put in temp housing he said he thought it was a hotel he was in a room by himself at first and he also pressed the issue of chow and getting a map to the area he was in because I have read here that your situation does happen alot. I would call him back ask if there is a front desk he may be able to ask questions there. Walk around the building he is in find another sailor and ask him or her if they can fill him in on what to do. The other thing is you can call his Recruiter tell him the situation and ask him if he can help or give you advice, our recuiter still checks in with my son and my son calls him when needed. It will get better my son got a roomie within a few days and it was a buddy from A school (lucky him) he made alot of friends fast and he is very happy there, so things will get better.

I hope I helped a little. What is the USS TR?

Comment by Steph on May 14, 2010 at 7:27pm

I'm on the internet on my phone, and it won't let me PM, but if you want to, I can get on yahoo and try to help as much as I can. My yahoo id is gijoezchick

BTW, shame on his sponsor for just leaving him there like that.

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