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When my oldest child graduated from college, she came home and moved all her things into her new apartment.  My son's room is almost exactly the way he left it when he left for boot camp.  When do you "clean out" their stuff?  I don't want it to look like "good riddance, he's gone!" but I can't see him moving his "stuff" to Power School or Proto.

 

What did you do?  When did your sailor take the rest of their stuff?

 

I still haven't received word from my son, but I'm trying to figure out where to put my extra guests this summer.

 

Thanks --

Becci

Views: 149

Replies to This Discussion

I cleaned out my sons room the first week he left for boot camp! It was my way of "letting go" and transitioning to him being away. The junk got thrown, the important things got boxed up and stored and a handful of things got sent to him at Goose Creek. (maybe we were lucky that he didn't have many big things to keep)

Before he left I gave him the chance to let me know what he would want etc and he just said to make my own decisions on most stuff. He isn't very sentimental about stuff anyway. I figured that he won't be living with us for the next 6 years or more - and probably never will, so I transitioned his room into MY house!
We finally turned my oldest son's room into a guest bedroom just this past year. He's is 28, married for almost 3 years and has been out of his room for longer than that - who's being sentimental? We're having our windows replaced and he said "Be sure to take lots of detailed pictures of my old windows" - he's more sentimental than me! In preparing for the new windows, we've moved around a lot of stuff in my sailor's room, and we decided it's time to go through everything and at least organize his room - he certainly isn't going to do do in the next 4-5 years! After he went to Boot Camp it received its first thorough cleaning in ages.
My hubby dealt with missing our son by totalling the bedroom! Even the carpet got ripped out. Our machinist always thought it was a good surface to paint and solder on ! lol
Took 4 truckload to just throw out stuff (polite here!) He has all sorts of broken up computers from when he repaired them for friends. We saved about 4 box loads of things, and when he moved to an apartment off base, we took it too him. He then asked "why did you bring me this junk?" We showed him where the dumpster was.
Clothes we hung on to for a while, but by the time he got to Power School, he lost weight in the waist and had to buy all new. We just saved his long sleeved t shirt and sweats.
We now have laminate flooring in the basement room, new bedding, and empty bureaus and closet. When company comes they really like the "BEQ."
What's BEQ (Before Entering Quit?) Help!

becci
Never thought about the clothes in the closet - Yikes!!
Ahhh... the cleaning of the room. Well, James and I had gone through some of his stuff before he left, but didn't really pack too much away.

But then, literally the minute James left.... his brother took over the space (well, his room IS where the computer was after all). The only problem, was that he was making a total disaster area out of BOTH rooms. So we finally went thru all of James' things. We donated a lot of his clothes, the ones that we thought he would want were saved for him. We boxed up his childhood mementos, and gave the room a thorough cleaning. Then we let Michael move all of his things in there, and Michael's room became an official Guest room - fresh paint and all! All of this was while he was still in bootcamp.

I think James has mixed emotions about it - he gets the nice clean Guest room when he comes home, but I don't know how he felt about his room being given away so callously - even though he had no plans to move back. He claims he's not sentimental, but he's had his moments! And technically it's not his "childhood" room anyway, since he was going into 10th grade when we moved to Florida.

Oh, he did leave us with a fish tank that he poured a lot of money into - 4 months before he left for bootcamp!! When he came home on break in March he brought the 3 survivors (out of 20 something) to Petco and we finally got it dismantled.
I'm not a mom, I'm a girlfriend. But I've gone through this with my mom because my brother is in the Navy too.

Mom waited forever to clean out Alan's room... He had been to college for four or five years and then enlisted. So she was used to it still being HIS room. He's not a Nuke... he's a Missile Tech, but after his schooling in Kingsbay, he came back home before heading out to Washington. He took some of his stuff with him. Like his old TV and some of his civilian clothes. After his first deployment, he told my mom that he didn't want anything he had back home anymore. She was given permission to get rid of all his old clothes. Some of them she donated because they were nicer clothes, while others she just pitched (he really liked a select few tshirts).

I guess its still Alan's room. He still has some old stuff, but mostly its used as a "guest bedroom." Even though the only guests we ever have is my sister and her family, and my brother when he's home on leave :)

I really think it depends on the person. Some may take it the wrong way if you go through their stuff and pack things up and completely change their room. While others could care less. Just depends on the sailor I suppose :)
aaronsgirl - your last statement is exactly right. My daughter (not in the Navy) would have conniption fits if we touched anything in her room. She doesn't like anyone touching her stuff. She'll be moving back in to our empty nest in a couple of months - that should prove very interesting after being on her own for quite a few years. Maybe I can get her to go through all the stuff she left behind before she leaves again???
Oh it took mom years of nagging Alan to get him to go through his stuff. And he leave really went through it... just told her to get rid of it :) He did leave his tip jar for me to keep... that 70 bucks was nice :)

But if she's been gone for a few years just tell her you'd like her to go through her stuff and keep what she wants and the rest will be thrown away (or given to charity). Just make sure she knows that the room is still there for her whenever she comes back home. That's probably the reason why she doesn't want to go through it... it may feel as if she cleans everything out, it won't be hers anymore. At least that's what I would think :)
I'm glad to see everyone else has the same problems -- it's mostly sentimental. I have got new bedding and drapes and like everyone else cleaned the room (all except the closet!!!). Before Chris left we told him he could have the walk-in closet in his room for storage and everything he could get in there he could keep. He totally measured and said he could fit 15 bins in there and used every square inch of it -- so the closet is off limits for now. He has tons of model airplanes and ships. They can't go in the garage or the attic (too hot in Houston) -- so that is what is in the closet in storage bins. I just can't get rid of them. He says he wants them when he finally does get a house. He is very sentimental so I guess I have the room, but not the closet. I guess I'll just hold on to them until he does get out and then we will see. I have 2 other guests rooms so it really isn't a big deal to lose the closet -- at least that is what I tell myself....maybe I just don't want to let go and neither does he.
The joke here is that is when he leaves for BC he will finally get a bathroom in down stairs I didn't want to do it sooner cuz I didn't need another to clean and the knife throwing air soft guns (they now call it NAVY training) my walls in basement are gone and need to be replaced uuugh boys the younger one has started to navy train too we are packing prior leaving maybe I'll get my spa room mmmmm dreaming is nice
My sailor did well in boot camp and he is excelling in MM "A" school. Chances are good that he will do well in power school and prototype. But there are a multitude of things that could derail his career in the Navy. Medical, security clearance, disciplinary actions. If I get a phone call from him saying "Dad, I'm coming home", he will have his room just as he left to come home to. If he comes home unexpectedly or for leave he can shovel out the garbage he left when he went to boot camp. He has added much to my life experience and I owe him that much.
My son went through his things when he came home for leave. That was about 3 months after his PIR. Then we packed up the rest into storage boxes.

We kind of did the ultimate clean out.... We Moved! Yup, new house,new town. So, whatever he wanted, he had to take with him.

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