I'm lost

[Ethansmom]

My son was due to graduate this Friday but called last night when his division was in Battle Stations to tell me he had an injury to both knees and tibia's. He couldn't really give me the medical terminology for it as there really wasn't enough time. 

I want to help him but don't know how. I know to send the letters and notes. I have even enlisted in family members to do the same. I know he needs all the encouragement he can get. He's really down on himself right now and wants to quit.

I guess what I need to know is where do we go from here? I read something about phases but don't know what they are or what they mean. I don't know what to expect. Can he make calls? Can he receive care packages? How long do they generally stay there? Anything else that I am missing? 

Any help or feedback would be appreciated.

[Jill]

Hi wrmheart48.

(I had a book written here, and it wouldn't load, grrr.....)  I'll try to keep it shorter this time.  First thing you need to remember is to breathe, and realize that everything will be OK.  I see a lot of positive things in your post.  If your son made it all the way to Battlestations, that means that he won't have to repeat the whole training process, and can finish up with another division and graduate as soon as he heals.
You're doing the right thing by writing, and having your family do the same.  They need that.  I wrote every single day when my son was in here.  It's perfectly normal for him to be down and want to quit, they all go through that when they are first put in RCU.  But it doesn't last long.  Pretty soon they have new goals to achieve and they will be working toward those goals, just like they did in training.
Read through the past posts on here, there is a wealth of information that will help answer your questions.  Read clear back to the beginning of 2012, as there were a lot more moms on here then, with a lot more information.  There are phases, four of them, but not knowing which phase your son might be in....it's hard to say what comes next.  
Yes, you will receive calls but keep your phone with you 24/7 because you never know when they will come.  They are not frequent, but sometimes, you may get up to 45 minutes to talk.  Keep a running written list of all the questions that you want to ask him, and be prepared to jot down the answers to those questions too.  (Hindsight advice, believe me)  We were able to send books and puzzle magazines for awhile, but then they made us stop.  The rules depend on who is in charge of RCU at that time.  Best way to find out what you can send and what you can't is to send a letter to your son in the morning and ask.
There's no hard and fast rule about how long they will be in RCU, it just depends on the severity of the injury.  Sometimes only a week or so, other times, like with my son, it was weeks, 3 months to be exact.  
Take heart, and realize that the trials  that your son is going through right now will only aid him down the road.  I know this to be true.  I am sitting in a hotel room with my sailor right now, in Norfolk, VA.  He just got home from deployment in the Mediterranean.  I told him about your son, and he said to tell you that it's a lot more difficult on us moms than it is on the recruits.  It's just a temporary setback, life will go on, and he will be back on track soon.
Pray, for yourself and your son, breathe, write, and repeat.  It won't last long, and great things await.  Feel free to yell at me if you need to.

Prayers for your peace of mind, and for your sons quick healing!
Jill

[Ethansmom]

Thank you for your feedback. Can you tell me some things to put in with the cards and letters? I just bought a word search and crossword puzzle book to take out so I can send them a little at a time. Is there anything else you can offer. I have and will send pics. He has a new niece that he misses so I am sending them as well. But I don't want him to get bored with the same things. Any ideas would be great! Thank you!

[JELLSMOM]

Good Morning wrmheart48!  My daughter was also to PIR on Friday 9/20, about 3 weeks ago I got a call and she was in tears, said she had a stress fracture in her Tibia, that was the last call I got.  I ahve gotten letters, almost everyday from her...she was moved to phase 2 the 2nd week there, they origtinally told her she would need approx 6 weeks to heal, however in one of her letters they moved it down to 4 weeks.  So once she is healed she will need to complete bobotcamp and then battlestations...I send her a letter everyday, I include picuteres of family friends, old ones and new ones.  I have ripped out pages of crossword puzzles and included them, i print off poems,quotes of encouragement.  She also mentioned in one of her letters that she was low on shower gel and her div was deneied going to the NEX because some boys bought some items they werent allowed t have so I bought a box at the post office, 1 price box, and filled it with 9 bottles of body wash, shampoo and conditioner...another mom had told me it was ok....but i havnt heard from my daughter so I dont know that she even got them.  However my daughter was very disappointed, her last letters are now positive and she is happy to heal and move on to graduate boot camp.  Its just a stepping stone in their career as a Navy sailor!

Good luck, i will pray for your son as well as all our children in RCU!

[bonichione]

Hi:

I am just wondering how your daughter is doing?  My daughter was due to graduate on Friday 9/20 and is now in RCU as well for back injury.  I am not sure what to expect.  I am hoping you have gotten some news on your daughter

[JELLSMOM]

@wrmheart48, if you private message me your SR's name I will send him a card of encouragement, I had other moms offer to send my SR a card when she first got to RCU and it helped just for her to know other people care and support them, and we have the upmost respect for all SR's!

 

[Ethansmom]

BTW, my name is Elaine. I didn't know how to put it in the profile, lol. And I don't know how to send a PM on here. Can you help?

[tidefan]

got a phone call last night. 3weeks before PIR. My SR fell and fractured his elbow. They moved him to RCU. Everything I read is confusing. They are starting physical therapy today. My friends that are PT's say no weigh bearing for 6 to 8 weeks and then he will have to start his push ups and sit ups over and his run. He has not had PFA yet so even though he is not being sent home and can work on his book portion of boot camp he will be several months there. Of course the plan was PIR 11/22, sub school and then home for Christmas from A school. So NO. Not going to happen. My friend at work today said so he does not come home for Christmas, or New Years he will come home when he graduates. No probably not. Straight to sub school and then A school and after A school he might get to come home before being deployed. I wanted to slap her but she does not understand. :0 she is a good friend just does not get it.

[bonichione]

I certainly understand how you feel.  I was really sorry when I told my co-worker, a retired Nurse Practitioner from the Navy, that my daughter had failed her run.  At the time, I did not know that my daughter had a back injury, because she spoke with her father and told him she could not talk, because she was very upset. She has been on Ship 4 RCU ever since. My co-worker said that she would probably be coming home since the government shut down.  My daughter called the Thursday, one week from her PIR date which was September 20th.  There has been nothing but pain and anxiety for me.  I never knew that I would feel my child's pain, like I do now.  This is why I am very grateful to have the support of the various groups through "navyformoms.com".  We are experiencing the same things, some worst or better than others.  Visit the other groups and read the successes of the SRs. Some have made me cried, but I found answers that I was seeking and comforting information.  I encourage you to encourage yourself and not to listen to the negativity of many.  I will be praying for your SR's speedy recovery.

[tidefan]

thank you. The same "friend" and I had a big problem last night. The other problem is that we work together. She told me to "get over it". Not what I wanted or needed to hear. Thank you for your encouraging words.

[Jolene2Sailors]

My son was in RCU for stress fractures in both his feet. He was placed there the beginning of week 4 and finished boot camp from RCU. His graduation date was set back by three weeks, and he didn't get to participate in PIR, but he did graduate. We were able to spend the weekend with him. After graduation, he was in THU (another medical hold area) another two months until being sent to school. We all survived, but IT IS HARD!!! I totally feel your pain! I stopped telling anyone what was going on, because it was so frustrating to hear inane comments like: Didn't he know it would be hard? Why are you so worried? Grrr... 

Here is what I did for my son, who loves to read. I extended the margins on a Word document to .3 -- top, bottom, left, and right. I copied articles from the internet (stuff I know he would like) and some Edgar Allan Poe short stories (which I really like). Six pages of typing paper can be sent in a legal size envelope for one stamp, so I copied whatever I had from one-sided to two-sided. With the extended margins, you can really get a lot on a page. I also found a free Sudoku puzzle page and sent him those. I sent a packet like that every day until he was out of RCU. I also included a daily devotional: Rick Warren puts out a really nice daily devotional that I get emailed to me every day.

Anyway, I hope that helps. The time seems interminable, but it will soon be over. My first son graduated last October. My second son graduates the day before Thanksgiving. Go Navy!!! :)

[bonichione]

You all inspire me to do more.  I really feel I haven't been able to support my daughter very much. I have only been able to send a letter once a week.  I need to do better! I think and pray for her everyday and I feel really depressed most of the time.  She was schedule for PIR on September 20th which she was unable to complete because of a back injury.  She has been in RCU ever since.  I have not spoken to her for almost 7 weeks, but we did get a letter dated Nov 1st telling us she need to have a plan B, since the doctor told her if she does not get better within 6-8 weeks she will be sent home.  This was very upsetting -- at first, but I just want her to be alright with whatever the outcome.  Thank you for your suggestions, and I know you are very grateful this portion is over for you and your son--I cannot wait until it is my turn.  Because this is hard.  Again, enjoy and Congratulations to the new Sailor!