Fairer Winds Blowing

[B mom of S]

It is amazing how wonderful this site is for all of us. No matter where I am in the thick of things, someone always has kind words and thoughts of encouragement. And, through our own experiences, we are able to pass on that same empathy and kindness.

What struck me today was that as we pass on what we have gathered along the way, we get to stop and catch our breath for just a moment to reflect how things were "then" and how we are now. Often those reflections are astounding. Not only have we gathered a wealth of information, but we remember how we felt at similar junctions. It all comes back. We know that not only have our mids grown, but we have too.

I remember all too fondly my son's Plebe year, or as he would tell me... Mom you weren't there. OK, OK. Let me clarify.... I remember all too fondly HOW I WAS during my so's Plebe year.I must say, the gentle breeze since then, and the ability to actually pause long enough to take a LONG, SLOW, DEEP BREATH is quite refreshing. There is a gentle peace, knowing he is making huge strides through his leaps and bounds.

Ahhhh....... I remember it well. Both my husband and I would get so completely exasperated with the seemingly simple solutions and the chance he was seemingly throwing away. It was gut wrenching. I used to tell him to GO! ASK! GO ask for help!!! And no, we cannot make them.

HOWEVER!!!!! There is something better. The Navy Way; and they are so skilled and adept at dealing with Plebes. They have seen this before. Many Plebes have experienced/are experiencing time management and the disciplined study skills struggles. Mine was no different. The good news is that MOST get thru it well. It is the
parents who are scarred much longer. Their c/o's are aware of any work which is considered substandard, and long before they get to the edge of the cliff, they can and do pull them back from the edge. This behavior
is often seen in some of the brightest kids, those top in their class in HS. Because they knew so much, they put little or no effort into learning what "they didn't know". They often could surmise the correct answer, but ask them to detail that logic and use it elsewhere in a course at the Academy; it almost always was their demise. There are loss of privileges and consequences if it persists. Usually they get the
message pretty quickly.

The one thing I have found that helps, although a mom never gives up her worries completely, is to know that someone else bigger, meaner, and tougher will be on their case. OMG, what a blessing! Oddly enough, our son
has since mentioned a few of his trials.... To which I remind him that "Mommy Bootcamp", was the easy part for him.

Keep in mind they are rather overwhelmed with the start of the Academic year, and adjusting to Navy life. I PROMISE, it does get easier second semester, although after the holiday break they dread going back after a
taste of their old civilian life. Somewhere between their return of second semester and the end of their summer blocks, they begin to realize that their old civilian life has faded substantially. Their friends, are still their friends, but our mids take a step back and look at their friends.... and they look at themselves. They are often
astounded by the glaringly obvious contrast, and the mids realize that they themselves are worlds ahead.

I can tell you that Scott was excited about his Youngster year, (sophomore). He has matured beyond his years. Yours will too. I promise. The academy has a "fast track" program to help these teen pups mature into stellar young leaders. Each step, each hoop is designed to insure they master this on time. There are adjustments as needed, if they are not up to speed.

Grades had improved greatly over last semester, and he has learned NOT to accept "you don't know what you don't know". Now he knows he better find out, and develop a method early on to do so. His PT times have improved, and I hear a smile in his laughter.

Hang in there. Mommy boot camp gave them a great prerequisite for the Academy in the first place, but I am happy to pass the torch to the Navy!

[B mom of S]

Amen, Thank you Judy!