Worried

[envigado]

My son left for Japan in Aug of this year. He joined the Navy with a promise of a good job, but apparently they have him painting and scrubbing the ship. The main reason he joined the Navy was because he had no direction in his life. He was awarded a scholarship to go to college but dropped in the first semester. He just refused to go to college; his next move was to become a police officer but unfortunately that didn't work for him either, he resigned after a few months of working in a very peculiar station in Florida. His next big move was to join the Navy, he scored well and was short by two points to join the Nuclear program. His recruiter told him and me that for sure he would be assigned a good job once he got to Japan. I guess they consider painting and scrubbing the ship a good job!

The reason I am writing this and giving a bit of info about my son is because I am seeing signs of deep depression and I don't know what to do. He refuses to speak to a psychologist or any one else for that matter. Without giving more details I have to say I am afraid he may do something drastic and I am preparing myself for the worst. I am not being dramatic nor am I exaggerating his state of mind. I would never forgive myself if something happens without me obtaining information that may help his case.

Extremely worried mother.

[mom 56]

i am sorry your son is having a hard time did his recruitter not show him different jobs before he went into bootcamp i agree with wendy the chaplain would be a good person to talk to does he have any friends he can talk to your son ship might have a group you could talk to or there is a group for moms with children in japan as well i think please let me know if i can do anything to help hope you can find someone that can help you both

[BunkerQB]

If you can find a way of communicating the following to your son without letting him know that you have talked about this on an open blog it might help him:
THE VALUE OF CLEANING.
My son is a nuke officer on a submarine. When he is out somewhere in the middle of Pacific. His days consist of 2 six hour watches, 1 six hour paper-work/debriefing session and the remaining six hours he can do all his personal stuff, including sleep. When the boat is dry docked, his hours are even longer. Typically he has from 10 to 18 enlisted men who work under his direction. On a rotating basis, a few guys get "cleaning" duty. He comes in on his days off to help his guys clean, so they can get the job done and go home earlier. Even the captain on his boat comes in occasionally and rolls his sleeve. The whole thing is about TEAMWORK. It's about helping each other. It's about bonding. Every job is worth doing well. This is the Navy.
For your son, if a rating was not available he could very well be assigned to do cleaning, painting or WHATEVER the Navy needs. He may be "undesignated" he could take this opportunity to find out what else is available and make sure his superior know that he is capable of more and that he will perform his job (regardless of the job assigned) in a competent and efficient manner. If he develops an attitude that cleaning is beneath him, that will be noted also.

[AJVNavyMom]

I will pray your son finds his way and the perfect fit for himself.

[BunkerQB]

BTW (stands for by the way - we use many abbreviations here), a number of people have left messages on your comment wall. Click on MY PAGE on the above menu bar - it will take you to your profile page - then scroll down. Also check your status box - see the little box on the upper right - this tells you if you have any private messages, friend request.
DON'T DISAPPEAR ON US. Let us know how things are.

[BunkerQB]

Just checking in to see if your son is OK? is he getting the help that he needs?