Confused mom

[Jojo1976]

Hi All,

My daughter is leaving to boot camp in July.Everyday that passes I dread the day is creeping up way to quick. I hate this feeling I have I spoke to her about joining the Military since she was young believing this was the best choice for her. Now that the time is coming im coming to regret all of that. I cry ever day im scared, sad and confused. She is my one and only daughter and we are super close. I try so hard to be strong but I cry all the time. I cherish all the time we have together and I am so proud of her but its so hard. I know I am not the only one who is going through this and feel foolish at times for crying. I just needed to vent sorry I dont know what to do anymore....

[lemonelephant]

Check your My Page.

[anchorsaweigh]

I know how you feel, I felt the same way; take every opportunity to enjoy time with her and just know this isn't forever; just around 60 days and then you can be ever so proud of her.  I dreaded it too; but it is not like she is being kidnapped, she made the choice to go and no matter what, you have to dig very deep to put your feelings aside and be supportive of what she wants, as not to make her doubt her decision as it is too late to back out.  It will make her feel better leaving home and know that you will be okay while she is gone.  You don't want her to worry about you when she will be so stressed.  Look at how proud you will be for her when this is completed.  I know it is hard, but nothing can be done at this point to change things, so be strong, especially for her, she needs the support now more than ever, not to be scared herself.  She may not tell you, but I am sure it is in the back of her mind.  This is a good thing, something she will be proud of for the rest of her life, try to put aside your feelings for this being a sad thing and be strong for her okay?  It does hurt, it is sad to see them go; Week 3 was when I started turning a corner on being happy for her.  It takes time, but soon, you will be hugging her at graduation and being so proud.  She will be a tough, mature woman!  Hang in there!!!  Give yourself some time!!

[DavidsMoM]

I am 6 months away from my youngest sons departure and while I read your struggles I am scared but I know in my heart he is doing what he truly wants to do he has watched his older brother and 2 sisters struggle to find jobs and come back home because they can't afford a place of their own.  He is my baby and the thought of him leaving so soon after graduation breaks my heart, but I am very proud of him always have been.  I thank all of you for posting your fears as it eases me knowing I am not alone.

[kbuddy]

I am only 10 days without my boy in BC- It does get easier- stay strong, stay fit and stay positive- this is what gets me through

[lemonelephant]

Check your My Page.

[Denise]

I recommend you join the RTC Facebook page. It was my life line when my son was at bootcamp. Also I would recommend seeing if the is a Blue Star Mothers group in you area. It is a group of military moms that feel your pain. Bless you my friend. It is a difficult 8 weeks but PIR will be here in no time. And remember no news is good news.

[imomxfour x 3 Sailors]

We're still fairly new to being a military family, but it does get easier!! Is it ever 100% "OK"? Of course not - and I still cry a couple of times a week - usually during moments of being super proud, and simply because I wish I could see it all happening in person. We miss them so much and would rather they be right here with us!! But it is absolutely AMAZING to see all they are accomplishing in their lives, the experiences they are having, the knowledge they are gaining, and the people they are meeting - and for that, I cannot focus on my own selfish wants & desires to keep my children near me. This is about them and their futures.

That said, when our first child left for boot camp in Dec 2012 at the age of 18, you would have thought we were dealing with a death in the family!! That's normal, so please know, you are alone, ok!!  Before we knew it, we were heading to PIR - and I can't even describe to you just how AWESOME that was!! Then, that weekend of PIR, our (now almost 25 yr old) daughter decided to go in, too! Say what? lol Biggest shock of our lives. But - it was much easier that time around. Next up, our 17 year old son is going in spring of 2015. We will only have 1 of our 4 children living near us.

Our daughter has since met & married the sweetest Navy boy that she met last summer in A School. They're all stationed in San Diego. We've visited twice (once for the wedding!!) and of course they've been home a few times on leave, as well. It's ALWAYS hard to say "See you later" I can't sugar coat that!! :(   We cherish those visits SO much!!!  Also, because our new son-in-law is from the LA/San Diego area AND planning on making the Navy a career, we know our daughter who only plans to do her 4 years, is never moving back home to boring old Illinois - so I am already planning for and setting us up financially for me to be able to visit often, and for extended stays, when the grandbabies start coming! ;-)  Is it how I envisioned my life as this stage or as a grandparent, no way - but I will make due, because it's all about my kids' happiness!!

It's a harsh reality in the moment, especially at first - but the pride you will feel later, heavily outweighs any negatives!!

(((HUGS))) and hang in there!!!

[lemonelephant]

I left info on groups on your My Page.

[imomxfour x 3 Sailors]

darnit!!! That obviously should have said, "you are NOT alone" up there.  Can't edit it now...