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**UPDATE 4/26/2022** Effective with the May 6, 2022 PIR 4 guests will be allowed.  Still must be fully vaccinated to attend.

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My daughter, Samantha, and the Navy hasn't ever been a good combination.  As I talked with my daughter today, June 02, 2010, she has informed me that her drill weekends, which as we all know, are only once a month and two weeks in the summer are starting to interfere with her culinary career as she attends school in Pittsburgh, PA.  My daughter is almost 21 and is capable of her own decisions, and I need to let her make her own decisions, whether good or bad.  Samantha has told me that she no longer wants to be part of the Navy and pursue her culinary career with more gusto.  Nothing has gone right for my daughter from the time she was in BC and VA for

A school.  Samantha did not graduate with her unit at Great Lakes because of her swim troubles, got kicked out of A school for lack of effort with her schooling and took her a long time after getting out of A school in the beginning of October to check in with her reserve center.  They were calling me at home and looking for her and was facing some negative consequences if my daughter did not check in soon.  Eventually, she did but with a lot of reservation.


I am supportive of my daughter no matter what her decisions.  Just need to know if any other moms have encountered the same dilemna and need some feedback and support.





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Replies to This Discussion

If she doesn't want to be in the Navy, the Navy doesn't want her there. It's not for everyone.
Sounds like she is more passionate about a culinary career w/o the Navy. It's a good thing that your daughter discovered this right and not waste anymore of her time and effort. The military is what it is. As stated numerous times, it is not for everyone. It's also a good thing for the Navy not to expend any more resources on your daughter. The Navy deserves men and women who are truly dedicated and want to be there. She will be happier following her passion. It's OK. Everything will be OK. Good luck in the future.
Bunker Bee,
You don't know how much your support and understanding means to me in this difficult times of choices to make whether I agree or not with my daughter's decision, I will support her no matter what. Thanks!
Yikes. She must be very, very careful. She can't just quit, she has signed a legally binding contract. She should talk to her unit commander and discuss her options. Everything I've read says she wouldn't be court martialed unless she was called to active duty then refused to show up. That could technically be federal prison, but I don't know if that's actually happened. Please try to support her with facts as well as with your love! Too bad she can't fulfill her oath, but not everyone makes the cut.

Anyway, here's some info which you may find useful, you may have to go to the source material for the acronyms:

Navy Reserves

Under COMNAVCRUITCOMINST 1130.8F, The Navy Enlisted Recruiting Program, paragraphs 6A-6 and 6A-7, members of the Navy Reserve, who have not yet started IADT, who refuse to participate in drill or IADT orders are discharged as an uncharacterized Entry Level Separation (ELS). Members who go AWOL while in IADT are treated the same as active duty personnel who go AWOL.

BUPERSINST 1001.39F, Chapter 11 describes the criteria for unsatisfactory performance in the Navy Reserves. Reservists who have nine or more unexcused absences in a one year period or fail to complete AT are considered unsatisfactory performers. If the commanding officer believes the circumstances that caused the Reservist to be an unsatisfactory participant have been resolved, he/she can place the member on six months probation. Otherwise, the commander can recommend transfer to the IRR. Finally, the commander can initiate discharge proceedings for the reason of "unsatisfactory participation." According to MILPERSMAN 1910-304, such discharges are usually characterized as Honorable or General (Under Honorable Conditions).
Since she's in the reserves, she can "flunk out", yes? That's the way I was reading the instruction. The only time she'd face prison is if she was called up and then refused to train and be deployed? Sounds like she'd better take care of it sooner than later.
LOL about the chit for active duty, always amazes me when people think they can just quit ... although I had a few guys where I wanted to put in a chit to make them civilians. One hopes the quality is much better now that the selection process is more stringent.
The Army will not let you unless you have some undiscovered health issue.. etc.. you sign your in.. My cousin tried the "I dont like this and want to go home" about year into his service.. they said "sure go home, then you will be living in Leavenworth for awhile" My cousin stuck it out and is now 12 years into his career. Home sickness is a killer!
I don't think it is that easy to just "quit" the military either. My two sons are active duty, full-time, and I see what long-term benefits they will receive for their retirement years in comparison to any civilian job can offer you. My daughter is 21, but I am trying to open up her eyes to what she is throwing away if she just "walks away" and what consequences that will follow her. I now wish that I had someone to open my eyes to the possibilities the military had to offer when I was joining the work force. I can just talk to my daughter and be there, but I have to get through to her as to what she will be throwing away if she just "walks away!" Thanks for listening.
I have spoken to my daughter's recruiter and was informed from him as well as my daughter that she can ask for an administration discharge with no real serious consequences. The only consequence that my daughter would deal with is the denial of being hired should she apply for a federal job since the admin discharge would be on her record. Thanks for your support!
That is not true.
There are ramifications to any discharge that is not an Honorable Discharge. The following is a brief explanation from:

You may receive a discharge for many reasons. Under almost all conditions, whenever and however you leave the Navy, you will receive a discharge. Some ofthe reasons for receiving a discharge are as follows:
·Expiration of enlistment
·Disability, dependency, or hardship
·Fulfillment of service obligation
·Convenience of the government
If discharged for any of the above reasons, you will receive an honorable or a general discharge.

The five types of discharge are as follows:
1. Honorable
2. General (under honorable conditions)
3. Other than honorable
4. Bad conduct
5. Dishonorable

Some personnel think because a general discharge is given under honorable conditions, it is as good as the honorable discharge itself. However, that assumption is not true. A general discharge indicates satisfactory service but not to the established standard of the Navy.
Honorable Discharge
To receive an honorable discharge, you must havereceived a rating from good to excellent for your service to the Navy. Even though you only qualify for a general discharge, you may receive an honorable discharge under two circumstances.
1. When you are being separated because of adisability incurred in the line of duty
2. When you receive any awards for gallantry inaction, heroism, or other meritorious service

General Discharge
You receive a general discharge when you separate from the service, under honorable conditions, without a sufficiently meritorious military record to deserve an honorable discharge.

Other Than Honorable Discharge
You receive an other than honorable discharge form is conduct or security reasons.

Bad Conduct Discharge
You receive a bad conduct discharge (BCD) whenyou separate from the service under conditions other than honorable. You receive a bad conduct discharge only by an approved sentence of a general or a special court-martial.

Dishonorable Discharge
You receive a dishonorable discharge (DD) when you separate from the service under dishonorable conditions. You may receive a dishonorable dischargeonly by a general court-martial and as appropriate for serious offenses calling for dishonorable separation as part of the punishment.

Some people will try to convince you (or themselves) that the type of discharge they receive will make no difference in their civilian lives. Others will tell you that a discharge under less than honorable conditions can be upgraded if they show themselves to have been good citizens for a time. How wrong they are! Although some discharges have been upgraded by the Board for Correction of Naval Records, the percentage is small. The Board is not interested in your civilian life, but how you performed while in the Navy. When you leave the Navy, you want to do so with an honorable discharge. An honorable discharge has many advantages for you throughout your life. Some of the immediate advantages are the entitlements to various veterans’ benefits and rights. When you apply for a job or for entry to a school or college, you will find an honorable discharge is advantageous, and, in many instances, an absolute necessity. Most important of all, and vital for your future self-respect and peace of mind,is the knowledge that your service to your country wasup to standard.Receiving an honorable or general discharge makesyou eligible for all federal benefits (and they are considerable).
Receiving a dishonorable or bad conduct discharge by a general court-martial disqualifies you for any benefits. A bad conduct discharge from a special court-martial even disqualifies you for any military benefits such as transportation home or payment for accrued leave. A bad conduct discharge bars you from receiving civil service employment preference, reemployment rights, or other related benefits. The Veterans’ Administration decides your entitlement to veterans’ benefits on an individual basis. Failing to receive an honorable discharge also has consequences of a more personal and far-reaching nature. You bring shame to your family. You will have difficulty explaining your dishonorable or bad conduct discharge to friends who have honorable military service. You will have difficulty getting good jobs and getting accepted into good schools. Everybody knows the Navy does not give bad conduct discharges except for serious or repeated offenses. Thus, you may have a hard time proving that people can trust you as a friend or to do a job.
Receiving an honorable discharge means you can face the world proudly and secure in the knowledge that your years served in the Navy were well spent. On the other hand, receiving a dishonorable or bad conduct discharge means you must admit to wasted years in the Navy. It means you failed in your duty to your country and in meeting the high standards of the Navy."
Is thistrue i just wandered because i know that the navy life is not for everyone. I feel so lost without my son at home and he is my only son. And he wants to leave after three years but does not want a bad dischargeHow can he go about it
A contract is a contract is a contract. She may have to serve her time and then get out, but be very careful, a "dishonrable discharge" will follow her the rest of her life. Sad that she doesn't have the "stick-to-it-ness" that's required for military life.


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