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my husband is currently an E-3
and he got orders on monday that he will be going to Japan, but then
they realized he was married and they said that they couldn't send him
over there because he was married. so they will be giving him a new
station. we talked today, i couldn't really hear him well but he said he
looked online to see his new orders and it says japan still. i got a
feeling it could change later so im not to worried about it but what im
curious about if can they send him to japan without me. i believe it's
called unaccompanied orders? im not sure because this will be our first
station.

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Paper work takes time. If they said he isnt going to be stationed in Japan then they will get him changed. Sit back and just wait. Its hard but there is just nothing you can do to speed it up. It will get worked out. And really the miliitary can do what they want.
Man... This is something you've got to keep your husband focused on.

I run a Navy forum website and I have had this same thing happen to one of my members. I know this subject really well. Yes, the Navy has a rule that will not allow young Navy couples to transfer overseas, which includes Hawaii. The Navy regulation is U.S. Navy MILPERSMAN 1300-302 called Suitability and Selection for Overseas Services which states:
“1.b. Members in paygrades E-3 and below with family member(s), will not be assigned to duty in an overseas area, including Hawaii...Members may be assigned unaccompanied, based on readiness needs.”

The last statement is the killer "based on readiness needs". The guy on my website was a MA. They said that he was needed in Japan for shore duty, and they transfer him without his wife and child. He was an E1. The base in Japan said that he needed to make E4 prior to approving Command Sponsorship for his wife and child. Being a E1, it was impossible for him to make E4 prior to his 2 years tour in Japan. The wife wrote their Senator, she wrote the CO in Japan, she wrote everyone, and nothing changed. He got 19 months into his tour, and the only time he saw his wife and child was when they went there on vacation. Thanks God for Skype because that held their marriage together. Luckily (or maybe un-luckily), when he got to his 19 month mark, he had an issue which he was discharged for. Where his messed up is he forgot to list that he was married on his DD-1306 form, and the Navy assumed he was single.

If you get to the point where they don't change his orders, you really should start talking to the member on my website. I can give you her email address if she says it's ok. She has already blazed this path, she has the knowledge of what to expect.

Again, I don't want this post to bring you down, even though I know it will. I want this post to help you and your sailor to keep focused on this, and to keeping hammering to get these orders changed. Once he leaves for Japan, it will not change. You have got to keep on him, so he can put pressure on the Navy now. If you have financial, or other problems, he needs to list them now so he is not pass his overseas screening. Here is the MILPERSMAN 1300-302, read it carefully...(I will also add you as a friend)

http://www.npc.navy.mil/NR/rdonlyres/BA171374-25A1-4A56-BA05-DC1BD9...
Craig beat me to it. Yes, they can send him without you. Yes, he has to bug them constantly about the change. My friend was an MA, married, and they posted her orders to Diego Garcia! That is always unaccompanied. She got it changed to Norfolk, and sorry, I don't know how long that took. It can be done, he has to put his foot down.

Best of luck and keep us posted.
Anit M and all - Man, when I read her question, it just hit a nerve since I just had that problem with one of my members. With my guy, I could never understand how the Navy could say they "Require" an E1 for shore duty in Japan. Lets face it, E1's are just learning, and truly should be replaced quickly. I followed this issue for 19month straight.

I'm looking back at all the info we tried with my guy and here is one that didn't work. We tried the duty swap, because there are plenty of single MA's that would love to go to Japan. However if you read the rules on duty swaps, you must " b. No-cost exchange of duty must meet the mileage criteria of no more than 30 miles away from servicemember's present duty station (geographic location)." So what good does that do if it's only within a 30 mile limit? .... It was a total sucky deal for this sailor. In my mind, thankfully he was discharged for something totally different. At least he is now happy with being with his family now.

Good seeing you Anti M.... I beat you to the punch because I skipped out of work early today. I truly shouldn't have been here.... shhh don't tell my boss......~ha......

http://www.npc.navy.mil/ReferenceLibrary/MILPERSMAN/1000MilitaryPer...
thank you craig and anti-m. i truly appreciate it! it's good to know this has happened to someone before. i couldn't figure it out when i heard i would be left behind. i understood that the Navy would put him anywhere he was needed but i didn't think they would actually make him leave his wife behind. we have no kids so i though maybe, " hey it's not really to expensive to move me". i hope his orders do change, or ill just have to learn to live with it. from what i read i dont think i would be able to survive there in Japan. it looks expensive to live. i would like to ask you both on what i should tell my husband about bugging the Navy. what does he say, how does he do it and bug who. im sure he will listen and do it. craig, i would love to join your site navy forum site if possible. and if the lady approves her email address i would love to get in contact with her. i will be sure to read the information carefully. thank you both very much and any other information you can give me i would definitely love to read it.
I was stationed in Japan for 12 years, both as active duty and as a dependent wife. I can tell you, without that command sponsorship, it is nearly impossible to live there as a dependent because you can't stay for more than 90 days on a tourist visa. It is a foreign country with immigration laws after all.

But here's to hoping things get straightened out.
I have two websites, NavyFamilies.com and NavyDep.com. For this subject you need, join the NavyDep.com site.
It is very possible that this could happen, and then you will not be able to join him until he makes E4. Your husband needs to get a little more involved and contact his detailer himself, or he needs to go to the personal office and keep on them. He needs to say that he is waiting for his new orders. Hopefully they will change, have him get aggressive about it and call daily until it is done. Once he is on the NKO website, on the left side is the career management link. He can go in and even check on different jobs for his rate and rank and then advise his detailer that he found an opening he is interested in. On a hopeful note, most unaccompanied orders are only for a year or less (unless extended a few months or volunteer more duty), unaccompanied orders are not a 3 year tour.
Sorry, you do have some outdated information. I am ex-navy and was surprised to learn that unaccompanied orders can indeed, be three year tours. In fact, that's the norm now. I was used to the old two year orders, but that is no longer in effect. Isolated duty isn't even a year now, even Diego Garcia is two years!
I hope for your sake he doesnt get sent My fiance just got sent over to Japan, we are not married but were planning on getting married soon and we have a child together. However for some reason when he got his orders the fact that he had a dependent wasn't included. When he got to Japan his CO put in for an early return which has been denied. So right now we have know idea what our future holds!

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