I really think this site is a great resource, but I don't think I'm fitting in well. My son left for BC yesterday and we had know since November he was. I'm not heartbroke, I'm not crying at the slightest thing, not sleeping with his pillow/shirt/stuffed animal, etc.
Not saying it wasn't hard to walk away. I cried. I worry. I'm concerned & hoping things go well, but also knowing he's going to have hard times. This is his journey though, not mine. I'm here to be strong for him & support him.
I guess seeing everyone's post make me wonder if I'm heartless. I would love to comment on posts, but I think my posts won't really feed into the tears & loneliness.....
Any others out there like me just looking for information & friends that are on the same page I am?
You have a lot to be proud of. Teaching the balance of family & independence is hard. I do feel for those that I don't think prepared themselves on letting go. We spent most of their high school time changing their mindset to move forward.
I was a little sad when he left also, but it's weird to call it sad. I don't think that's what it even really was. More reflective & melancholy. Everytime my heart tried to eek out a tear my pride took over. It was a wonderful feeling!
What a wonderful sentiment. My son leaves in April and I hope I can remember to tell him that when the time comes. I am happy to have found this group as I feel that I will be sad when he leaves, but I feel he is doing the right thing and am so proud of him. I don't see myself in endless tears-this is what he was meant to do!
29junkie and Bunker QB, it's funny about how your posts about not fitting in make me feel like maybe I fit after all. I just take the happy moments and keep very busy. Sure I miss him, and his cat was extremely lost when my son left, but I'm a private person and know that he is on the right path. I am happy to see all of the positive changes in him from being in the Navy and my car and living room are loaded with Navy stuff. You are so right Bunker QB that we all react differently. I guess I just felt a need to chime in
Often, I have a hard time sympathizing with people who are over-the-top emotionally. I think, how are these women going to handle it when he/she goes on deployment? Gives me cause for concern. So much emotions is waste just worrying. Not a judgment, of course. Many people need to remember this Navy/Boot Camp thing is about the child not the parent. Look at thing from the child's perspective before saying anything, writing anything.
I am glad you have found this thread and even more glad that you find it helpful and encouraging. Wonderful not to feel alone. Don't hesitate to chime in anytime.
Oh I hear ya! My hubby deployed in the Army to Iraq & I saw what it did to those that weren't prepared. Sad.
Your insight is always so wonderful!! Thanks for all the add's on this post~
Makes me happy to think my one little post has connected with so many people. I think those of us that feel a little "different" from the majority find it hard to chime in. This post has helped me immensely find people that relate to how I feel. Good to hear that things are going well for you. Just ordered myself some Navy Mama stuff & can't wait.
Maybe we should actually form a group and call ourselves the "No Tears Group". We're not full of tears and over-the-top emotionally, but we do care passionately. We just have a different way of showing it--such as not falling asleep when they call at 0300. (I learned the hard way that 3 is am, 3 in the afternoon if 1500, "and don't mess it up again"). I also do a lot of baking and am here whenever I am needed. By the way, I am a single mom. I get my emotional support from my cats.
LMAO!!! I would weight a ton if I baked when I stressed.
I'm agreeing....this post has kind of taken on a life of it's own. I love knowing that it's helped & touched people. We are all here to contribute in some way & if this post helped one person I'm thrilled.
It's easy to start a group. Just click GROUPS, then +ADD. Why don't you go ahead and give it try? Or maybe 29junkie should give it a go since she started this whole thread. I dealt with my fears by doing, active participation. See all those discussions I started (click MAIN, look at middle column)? Those were the results of my sleepless nights. But it kept me young and technologically up-to-date. May I be an elderly (over 65) honorary member since my son is a FORMER sailor?
I just joined this group. I am very sad my son left for BC yesterday. But......It's a big relief, though, for this mom! No more worrying where he is or what he is doing. It's not that I didn't trust him, just anything could happen before basic and I didn't want him to jeopardize the opportunity in front of him.
You are so right about "jeopardize the opportunity in front of him" - so many moms, wives, girlfriends are wrapped up with how much they will missed their loved ones and how difficult it will be for them to continue with the business of living that they forget all about the "BIG PICTURE" - the wonderful career opportunities, the security of a job. There is nothing better for a guy (or a gal) than having a meaningful career, earning an income and be self supportive/sufficient.
As moms we spend years and often lots of money trying to launch their sons/daughters. The Navy is godsend for many whose families can not afford the money to send their kids thru college or technical school. This is one of the best use of our tax dollars.
I know there is lots of support for the wives if they are able to find the right community and other wives/fiancees/gfs - but it's still hard them. I look back on my own life at 20 and I don't think I would have been able to pack up and go to a strange city w/o family and friends nearby.
It's a tough world out there...what better way to grow up and see the world than to join the Navy. My husband is retired Navy and our oldest grandson join 1 1/2 years ago to be a Sonar Tech..we are so very proud.