recruiter advising not to disclose adhd diagnosis

[jen]

I know their are discussions regarding undisclosed medical diagnosis when joining the Navy. Does anyone have suggestion on how I can handle this?

I understand that this is a felony and in the long run could potentially ruin your life.  My 17 year old son has wanted to join the Navy for many years. His goal is to become a Seal. This is his single focus in life. He does know this is a felony but is certain he wont be caught.

Just as a "quick" back ground on my sons issues - He was diagnosed with ADHD in second grade and has been on meds since. I'm not sure but he may also   have a  secondary diagnosis of oppositional defiant disorder.  He is able to hold things together on meds enough to get by.  He tried going off his meds last summer for about 8 months. This didn't go very well he had some social issues and declining grades, none of this issues ended up in the legal system or in a suspension from school but they were boarder line. He was fired from his job at Dairy Queen. He requested to go back on his meds in Dec. and did better, (not great)  but now is off them again because he plans on joining the Navy in Nov. when he turns 18.

 He knows with an ADHD diagnosis he can not join. He has discussed this with the recruiter he has been in contact with since he was 15. My husband, my son, and I met with the recruiter last summer at which time the recruiter told him ( in our presence)  If he doesn't disclose the ADHD they won't know because they ( the navy) can't see his medical history. The recruiter also went on to say that ADHD is over diagnosed and everybody has that diagnosis so they can drug kids to get them to sit still in school.

I was livid. We spent 2 years trying to decide to medicate our son, and a lot of time researching the subject before deciding to medicate him. It was not a decision we took lightly. I can't believe the recruiter had the nerve to say these things in our presence.

Now to the issue at hand. I refuse to sign papers for early entry to the Navy because of his issues. I know my son plans on omitting this info on this admission paper work. I also know he is being coached as to what to say when challenged on this issue.  This issue has caused such a rift between us we are barely speaking, so don't bother suggesting a heart to heart talk with him we are years beyond that. He even had a psychologist tell him "if I had to do an eval on you for the Navy I would never recommend putting a gun in your hands."   I think this is very important information that the Navy needs to know about, but who do I talk to or where do I go?  What are my options? Obviously  I can't talk to the recruiter, or my son. They all think I'm just being an overprotective mother. I feel like I have until Nov. ( because he turns 18 in Nov.) before I really have no options. I also realize my son will never speak to me again if I take this away from him. What does a person do when they know some one is falsifying info on their admission paperwork?  I am for ever grateful for all our military veterans and  their families have done for us. I would be very proud to be the mother of a Sailor under different circumstances. Thank you for any advise you can offer.

[jen]

Bunker QB Thank you so much for your response. I obviously know ADHD doesn't make you any more or less likely to go on a shooting spree than your average person. I am painfully aware that not all people understand ADHD. :-(

While the focus of my post has turned  from recruiters misleading young impressionable  kids to ADHD, my concern remains with recruiters practices. I would think the military would want all jobs carried out with the utmost integrity and honesty. Unfortunately I don't feel that is the case.

I talked to my son today. He is ok with this whole situation, and just wants to get home. For 3 years he has been completely focused on being a Navy EOD. He didn't do any other preparations for college, tech. school, or the job market. Once he is home, hopefully in 2-3 weeks, we will be able to move on. I will be relieved to put the whole Navy experience behind us and move on. 

I am so thankful and appreciative of all who have served honorably in the military, and all they and their families sacrifice to do so.   My Father served during the Korean war, all my Uncles were in Vietnam, and I have several friends who served in the Gulf war and Afghanistan. These are remarkable men and women. God Bless.

[BunkerQB]

My family got to know the commander of  recruiting for our district on a personal level. We have spoken about recruiters misleading the applicants. It drives him crazy when it happens. The recruiting program has to be changed from within. Unfortunately, that is not going to happen any time soon.  Best of luck to your son and you.  There is something out there for him.

[lemonelephant]

He has to go through the entire Separation processm which takes a couple of weeks. See the info in FAQ about SEPS.