Thinking it over...

[Kelly0337]

My daughter  Blakely will be a junior in High School next year. She is seriously thinking about the Navy. I want to be supportive, but this is a difficult thing for me. Please post pros and cons for me and my daughter. It will be great to have somethings to talk about while helping her with this very important decision.

 

Thanks

 

[ChrisAmo]

I don't have a daughter but I imagine most things are about the same.

Pros: She'll have a career on an equal footing with men. Almost every job in the Navy is now open to women as well and she'll get paid the same as the men for the same job. She'll have a steady paycheck. She'll have health care. She'll get to travel and experience lots of new places. She can get a college degree. She'll make life-long friends. She'll be very proud to wear her uniform and serve her country.

Cons: Hmmmmm, have to think about this one........she'll have to wear a uniform of some sort most of the time. She'll have to take orders, so she will lose a bit of her independence. She'll probably be away from her family for months at a time (depending on her job). And everything will be done "the Navy way" like it or not.

Talk to a recruiter and get as much info as you can.

[fly 2]

The Pros out weigh the Cons.

Pros: Being the Proudest Parent alive.

Cons: Saying goodbye to them everytime they leave home to go back to base. That does not get any easier.

[Jess's Mom (Fire Controlman GL)]

Kelly, When my daughter told me in October that she was going to talk to a recruiter, I cried and took it so personnally that we didn't talk about it for about a month. She was just finishing up her first semester of college and realized community college was not for her and she didn't want to burden me finacially in going away for school. After a month of me doing research and a nice long face to face with her recruiter, I was actually excited about her decision. She just graduated from bootcamp on 5/21 and I have never been so proud of her in my life. The only drawback I have found is that I had to cut that final cord, let her be her own person, and not have any control or say in any decision she makes. She just started her ATT school (10 weeks of school just prior to her starting A School - tech school). We talk, text, and Skype everyday. It took a lot to get used to her not being home, but now that she has been gone, we have all adjusted.

The only con I have encountered so far is when they are in bootcamp the contact with her was very, very sparse. But after 8 or so weeks, that all changes. I could see the changes ( all for the better) in her each week in her letters. She went from being my kid, to a responnsible, respectable, courteous, polite, and grateful adult who chose her own path in life. Having only one child, it was difficult for me to let go, but we are even closer now than before she left, and we were very very close then. We appreciate each other so much more.

The best advice I can give you is to talk with her recruiter, and have her decide what type of career she is looking for through the Navy.

Best of luck in helping her with her decision, but remember, it is her decision to make. Just be supportive of her decision.

[Pat]

Navy...Great place to start the rest of her life. If a good test taker...get her an ASVAB review or look into on-line. The better she does, the more choices she will have for her rate (job).
Research what rates are out their and discuss what her interests are...pick a couple of rates that are of interest to her...take the ASVAB and see what options she has.
My best to both of you as she makes this important decision!

[Kelly0337]

Thanks! Wow I really appreciate all of the comments. I think our situation is much like yours "jess's mom". I think my Daughter is worried about paying for college. It is very helpful to have the insight of people who have been there, and who are currently going through what Blake and I may be going through in the future! Thank you!

[beatrizm (Ship04 Div192)]

Kelly 0337, My daughter caught me off guard when she first mentioned it, and I told her we could talk about it when she was ready (though I think secretly I figured she'd forget about it). Our situation is very similar to Jess' mom (and my daughter Savannah and her daughter Jess have become good friends since boot camp), only child, worried about paying for college, and also not sure what she wanted to study in college. But after meeting with her and the her recruiter, I was nervous at the prospect of her leaving, but so proud because I could see that she had given the idea serious thought. At that moment, I realized she was wanting to grow up and take charge of her life. There were many times after that initial meeting that I thought she was heading backwards. But in every letter I received from boot camp, I could see the changes in her. It was as though she was maturing before my very eyes. She has learned discipline, respect, the importance of teamwork and not letting her fellow sailors down and I have never been more proud.
The separation was difficult at times, though there were days while she was in boot camp when I was sooo relieved that I didn't have to wait up for her to get home :) It's easier now, since she has her cell phone and her laptop. We text almost every day and talk often. And she has more definite goals as to what exactly she wants do in the Navy, which she now sees as a career. So far, it's been a very positive experience.
And this site was a big help, even though I didn't really get started on it until she was in boot camp. But you'll find lots of people willing to share their experiences and support, as well as updates and explanations of terminology and the Navy way of doing things. Good luck to you both. And write as much as possible during boot camp, that's when she'll need it the most.

[Anabel]

Kelly,
Been there, done that. My son told us in the fall of his senior year in high schools that he had other plans than going to college. When he told us he wanted to join the Navy, my husband and I could not have been more surprised and neither could his best friends! He had never seemed interested before and all I could do was cry everyday and imagine him going to war and getting injured or worse. The thing with him though was that he wasn't really wanting our approval, although he was only 17, I guess he just wanted our support. It was very hard for me to get on board with it until one day he told us that if we didn't go with him to enlist while he was 17, he was going to go on his own when he turned 18. At that point, I realized I really needed to support him. We talked to 2 recruiters who came to our house and answered all our questions and concerns and I started to feel a little better about it. He enlisted in January of 2009 and left in October. One of my biggest concerns with him is that it was just a passing phase and he was going to regret joining the military for four years and not be able to get out if he didn't like it.
To make a long story short, he loves it and is already talking about maybe staying in for 20 years!
To say that he has changed would be an understatement! He's so much more polite, calmer and mature than he used to be. He was chosen as a Section Leader his second day in Bootcamp and as a class leader in A-school. The Navy has made a HUGE difference, for the better, than he used to be and at this point, I could not be prouder of him and what he's chosen to do. Look at it this way, these "kids" and they are kids at that age are making a commitment to serve their country and defend our rights. That's huge!
Even though I still have concerns for him and his future in the Navy, it's nothing like what I felt before he left.
Good luck with everything Mom. It's a very emotional time for parents, but one that will go from feeling scared and unsure to being the proudest you can ever feel for your child.