Hi everyone! I'm very new and this is my first post.
My son just shipped out today. I'm waiting for his allowed phone call, even though I know it'll be brief.
I'm an emotional wreck, though. He's my first born, and now he's flown the nest. I know he's in good hands, and he's smart and capable, but I hadn't anticipated feeling this much...sadness. I'm so proud of him! But...he's gone. Just like that.
Are there any other parents out there feeling a big bundle of emotions? How are you doing? Any moms that already went through this phase want to share your experience?
I'm so glad I found this community! It's helping me feel better already.
Natmom, I put info on the MA rating on your My Page.
Hi Kerith, I felt the same exact way about 7 weeks ago when our oldest of five left. BC is almost over for us. Thank goodness :) I felt so many emotions at once that it literally made me feel sick. And I was driving my husband insane. He just didn't seem to get it or understand how I was feeling.Then when I was accepted to this website. Things really settled down. Mamas here are very comforting and understanding and from what I have gathered most have felt the same way. Once communication is open to write you will feel better. I suggest starting to write now, it really helps with your emotions and feelings. Once you receive your SRs form letter you can put them all in the mail. It does get better, the first few weeks are extremely hard. One thing I have stuck by through this process which is really hard is, No news is good news. I have spent a lot of time studying and reading all over this website. It also helped me a lot. Knowing what my SR was going through and all he was learning and is still learning. This website and all of the ladies here are awesome supporters and cheerleaders. They are also very informative and knowledgeable. Any questions you may have ask away and someone will have an answer. Best wishes to you and your SR.
Kerith I would Like to welcome you to Navy Moms. I'm Phoenixmom and when I started a Year ago, let me tell you I was just like you with all the Emotions all over the place. I was a total mess. after I received the I'm here call that was it, it hit me and I knew it was for real. Me and my Son were unseperable he is the Baby of the Family and no matter what anyone said they just didnt know. LOL! I was a crying Mess, couldnt sleep or eat, couldnt go into his room. Ugh I remember oh so well! But as time has went on I have to say I'm a little better, it takes time! I say it doesnt get easier we get stronger. My son's anniversary is July 5th 1 year, he is stationed already, and has gone on hid first deployment. so every Step is a different Journey and all can do is to learn all we can and pray all goes well. I want you to know that you are not alone, if ever you need to talk, or need info this site is so good with the Mothers sharing their Experience and you will get many different answers on how to deal. My suggestion is to keep busy as much as you can and read up on everything. I will leave you some sites. Come Join Boot Camp Moms and I help out there, so if you ever need anything please reach out. Congrats to your New SR. (Seaman Recruit)
How long is the "I'm here!" call and when will s/he be able to call again?
The box will arrive first then 9 to 14 days after the form letter shall be received.
Your recruit will send The Form Letter once Phase 1 is over and s/he has passed the first PFA and has officially been assigned to a ship and division. (See When to Expect Your Form Letter and Physical Fitness Assessment (PFA) and Fitness Improvement Training ... for more information.)
Thank you for this! These links are so helpful. Everyone here has been so wonderful. I'm so thankful for this community and very thankful to my aunt who suggested this place. My little cousin joined right after his high school graduation, too. It's so good to know I'm not alone!
Hi Kerith, You are not alone! As you will find out as you read through this group, MANY of us have gone through and are going through exactly what you're feeling. It's SO HARD to let go! I cried because he was in a new season of "adult" life and wouldn't be coming back to live at home (which is a good thing because we want our children to be responsible adults.) I am so proud of him, & pray for him daily, but I still miss him. He's been gone for 4 weeks now, and it has gotten easier. Blessings to you!
I felt the same way you do! Today is 2 weeks since my son,also my first born, got to Great Lakes and I was a mess but it’s getting easier! Just waiting on the form letter now so I can mail all the letters I have written and hopefully get a letter from him! I know once we can communicate I will feel so much better!!! He is exactly where he wants to be so I’m just keeping that in mind! Hang in there! You can do this!!
Hi Kerith- I still remember exactly that way. Mine is my middle so you'd think I would be used to it but, NO! It was the day before my youngest's birthday and I was sobbing like someone had died!! My hubby found this site for me and I learned I was not a complete mental case.(I think my family were wondering!). Tuesday was 5 years since he left for BC! I know it's hard and I know it feels like your life will never be normal again. Pride, sorrow, missing them, fear, worry/concern, love... All overwhelming at once!! We are here for all of it!! The amazing ladies on here got me through and we will get you through too!! We haven't lost a Mom to the emotions of BC yet... We won't start with you!!
Phoenixmom gave you good links. There is another page not on this site that might help you http://www.navydep.com/forums/showthread.php?t=433 some of the P-days info has changed but after that it is pretty accurate. Read, Read, Read!!! There is a lot of stuff here that will help! Write LOTS but make sure you number each letter both on the letter and on the envelopes. NO Glitter, musical, care packages... Nothing that would draw any attention to your SR. The WORST part is the not knowing what is happening. Consider this boot camp for you too! No News IS Good News. Other than the "I'm here" call you will not get another "real" phone call till around week 4. That said you can get a call at any time!! These are usually calls for information and will be monitored and your SR will be all business then. Keep your phone with you and the ringer on HIGH at all times! You need to wait for the form letter to arrive before you send any mail! You will get the Box with his belongings that he took with him first. Then he will complete P-days. A new part of P-days it the first Physical Assessment. Only if they pass that will they be assigned to a division, at that time they will fill out the form letter and mail that out. DO NOT Call the recruiter for their address. First they really should not be giving it out due to OPSEC and PERSEC and second the information may or may not be accurate. Waiting is hard but you know where he is and that he is safe so you get to learn to wait. (Part of that BC training for Mom's I mentioned!) SR's are only given time to write home on Sunday mornings so don't panic that you don't get much mail. Sunday morning is their only time to get caught up on stuff. Some sleep, some go to worship, some study and some write a quick note home. Those letters are only mailed on Mondays so once you get your first letter you will know your mail day and can stop stalking the letter carrier! The first phone call and letter can be hard but try and keep your messages positive and supportive! Once they train a Mail Petty Officer (usually by Training week 3 ) they start getting the mail you sent. Letters sent early don't get delivered any sooner and in fact if the address is wrong then your letter may be delayed or returned to you much later! You raised a young man who wants to serve others first and foremost! The Navy life is different and folks won't get it but You are a strong and you can get through this!! We are here for you!!
My son left last week. It has been an emotional roller coaster but every day gets better. My son, who is my youngest, graduated from high school and was gone 10 days later. We are very close. I received his box of clothes this week, exactly a week after he left, so look for that from FedEx next week. I was so excited I hugged the FedEx woman!!! This is an amazing site and you will find lots of great info! Keep reading all that is posted. There is something to be learned in every post. We are all here for you! Be proud of your recruit! The welfare of our country is now in their hands!! We did a great job raising them!
Kerith, it looks like you have received a lot of comments. And I think you are now a member of the Nuke Moms group. (I have been gone for the evening and trying to catch up on all of my messages.)
A year ago tonight I was in the same place as you waiting for that scripted call to come. Although, I didn't really understand how scripted it was. So, listen carefully, and just say "I love you!!" Lots. Basically, they are telling you they will be sending a box, a form letter, and mine was trying to tell me that he would call in 3 weeks, but I thought it was a recorded call and I was just trying to tell him I love him, then he asked someone if that was everything and said good-bye. No emotion or anything in the call. I was so thankful he had called me when they landed at the airport!!
Tonight, he called an hour ago, which he is now an hour earlier time zone, to ask how much Ibuprofen he could take because they had a Burger Bash and had been joisting!!
For us Nuke Moms we at least get a little bit more time with them in school before they head out to the fleet, but it is still hard, but we also learn to let go and say a lot more prayers.
I had a busy summer last year and I also emailed him every night for about the first two weeks, then copied those emails when I had his address.
Hang in there and post lots, it is okay.
Hi Kerith, welcome to this group! :) as you can read on all your posts we have all been there. What momma doesn't turn into an emotional wreck when her baby is gone! I was experiencing all kind of mixed emotions when my SR left (my oldest of 6) I just didn't understand why he was gone. Why he decided to leave and join the navy lol. I cried, lost appetite, got depressed, and so on... I was a total mess nothing made me feel better and the "no communication" made it worst. The night he arrived at GL and I received his call I didn't even get to say "I love you" he hung up quickly and that shattered me emotionally I didn't understand why. The first couple of weeks were very difficult. Then the box came ( less than 1 week) as I opened it and saw his belongings (deep breath) that made me bust in tears AGAIN! I didn't find this site til after and I must say the experiences you hear about on this group and info given is really helpful. That made me feel much better and understand what my SR was going through and what he was learning as well. It's not easy for our SRs either we just need to be supportive and stay strong. It will get easier with time. I'm already looking forward to PIR next week your's will come too. then, the excitement will kick in and turn you into the happiest little thing as me and many moms right now. At least you know your not alone and that the moms out here understand what you are going through and are the greatest support. Welcome!