Oh boy.... I can do this, right?

[Colleen SHIP-13 DIV -309]

A few weeks ago my SR told me he was having second thoughts and didn't want to go. I was so upset and disappointed in that decision. He's a good kid, He has NO plans to attend college- he needs some discipline and a little insight about the real world as a grown up.... besides, there is nothing here in Niagara Falls NY and I want my kids out of here.  He changed his mind and decided to go through with it......Tonight he leaves for MEPS, he is sleeping in his room for the last time as my little boy....and oh my LORD my heart hurts.

I have already sent a kid to college out of State, my daughter...and I figured it couldn't be worse than the feeling I had when I drove away and saw her waving in my rearview mirror..... WRONG...LOL

How do you go from being a protective mama bear for 18 years to nothing in a day? You spend all this time protecting them, teaching them, nurturing them...and then one day- it's over? My baby sister was born when I was 12, at 19 I married in to an already made family... I have NEVER not had children to be responsible for.....now my nest will be big and empty...

I'm a big bawl bag this morning with a little bit of drama thrown in..and if one more person says to me "Remember the days you couldn't wait for him to move out?"... ARGH!

It get's better, right?

[JudyD]

Colleenrn,  I promise it will get easier, but first you will have a heavy heart and tears may come but then in week 3 you will get a call from your SR and again the tears will come but this time they will be tears of joy.  What really helped me when my "baby" left was this website.  Talking with other moms who are going through the same thing I was, was such a God send.  Good luck and hang in there.

[MomSeanEM2]

Colleen, If myself and all us other moms can do it so can you.

My son has been in the navy now for 2 + years. He graduated from BC in July of 2010. He is doing very well. He really likes it and the navy likes him. My son is a hard worker. He is now stationed in San Diego on a ship and is an EM2 (electricians mate Petty Officer 2nd Class) Our family couldn't be more proud of him. He is doing well and met a very nice girl in the navy also. He never wants to come back to Jersey. We all miss him very much but he fulfilled his dream to follow in his grandfathers footsteps. I'll never forget the night he came home from MEPS and my husband and I new nothing about it. He told his twin sister about it. He asked if the family could join together at the kitchen table and that he has something to tell us. "I joined the navy" we laugh now because we thought he was going to tell us he lost his job or somebody was pregnant. We were relieved and very happy for him and supported him in his decision. He will be returning to Great Lakes in August and Sept. for more schooling. He is doing very well and we couldn't be more proud of our sailor. Best of luck to you and all the other BC moms. Stay busy and send many letters and enjoy the letters you receive from him at BC. Some of the stories in his letters cracked us up. He will be fine.

[Colleen SHIP-13 DIV -309]

Thank you everyone for your knowledge and support. I know he will be fine, I know he is doing a great thing....but damn it.. this is all about ME...LOL...That is exactly how i was feeling all day yesterday. Everyone was reminding me how proud I should be, how quickly it will pass.. blah blah blah.. Let me cry.. :)

I did well until I dropped him off at the hotel..I didn't even cry when HE got all teary saying good bye to his best friend and then his girl friend....but last night was another story.. I think I scared the 2000 tourists who were waiting for the elevator when I stepped off.... oh well...

Now we are going to watch him do his Final Swear In, and then we are going to the airport with him until he leaves... (For anyone that doesn't know, the airlines will give you a fake boarding pass so you can go to the gate with him)

8 weeks can't come soon enough....

thanks again everyone, your words and stories were so very helpful yesterday

xoxo-Colleen

[navy momma]

My son left yesterday. And I couldn't agree more. I am tired of people telling me I should be proud and excited for his experiences, because I am. And I know he will be fine. He is a smart strong young man... But I am in mourning as a Mom. I miss his voice and his laughter. I miss his smell. And I miss his messes!!!

I was in the store and broke down into tears ( I kept trying to buy his favorite snacks out of habbit) I know this will get easier, but right now just let me have my weepathon.

 

[rnterry 04/817 PIR 7/27 alumni]

Colleenrn - Your right it is about you, right now and on this site it gets to be about you!  Of course you want the best for your Son (SR) and of course you are happy for him but there is NO WHERE in the world that prepares you for the emotions you will feel over the next few weeks.  My manfriend (we ain't kids anymore) is a retired Marine and I thought he was going to go nuts when I fell apart.  He hung in there, even I was surprised at how I reacted.  I have known a ton of personal loss in my life not to mention all the cancer patients I have said good bye to and thought I had this one in the bag. Noooooooo, however, it will get better and then when the letters start and then the phone call and making plans for your trip to Great Lakes and talking to us on this site, it all starts to take a rhythm.  Allow yourself your feelings they are real and they are well earned.  You did it Mom!  After my Son left I noticed that every week there would be pictures of his close friends on facebook and everyone of them was a party, party, party.  Which is fine but the contrast was stark, because I knew my Son was as safe as he humanly could be and learning, at a young age to be focused, disciplined and meeting other young men (not women - div 817 couldn't fraternize) who had a common goal.  Oh the world goal - sweet music to my ears.  Be careful with yourself for the next few days - cry, cry and cry somemore and then come tell us how you are doing. 

[roselilly]

Colleen,    We went through the same thing with my son, he changed hit least 100 times before he left for basic training, and even then the first had written letters we recived he was still thinking it was a mistake.  Stay positive, you know that this is a great thing for your son and your still his mom.  Give him lots of encouragement and love in your letters, then come on this site and get love and encouragement for yourself so you can keep going!!  We are all in the same boat on here ( no pun intended).  My son has been gone since July 12th and it is getting better, but some days are still a struggle.  Stay strong, and pray it helps.  I will be praying for you and your son!

[RoseRed Ship 12 Div 306]

I was you last week. I can hardly believe that it has been a week. Things are getting better. This site is great!!! Today I finally got the box of stuff. I couldn't believe how anxious I was to get it and so happy when I got it.....until I opened it, OMG the smell from the dirty socks and sneakers....remembered it wasn't so bad his room not being littered with them and laughed!!!! I have already written him 4 long letters and so have his two younger sisters.

Two weeks before he left he turned into the most horrible, I am 18 and I can do what I want monster...I regret wishing he would leave already because he was just so horrible. I see now in hindsight he was acting out. He was scared and trying to break the ties to us so it wouldn't hurt to leave...there was a turn around in him when I called him on it. Told him no matter what he did or how old he was, he would always be my baby!!!

We are a very close family.....he was the kid who called me from Prom to say he got there safe and was having a good time.....called as he left to tell me he was on his way home...not to worry. I never went more than hours with out talking to him...now it will be weeks. I also know I will not get back the kid I sent...I will get back a man!!! Can't wait for his PIR and when he gets to A school.

[JudyD]

To all of you new moms, I just remembered something I wanted to pass on to you.  When our daughter was in boot camp and I would write her every day I thought I was doing a good thing.  She wasn't allowed to tell us, and here is my advice to you. . . address the envelope in BLACK ink ONLY and you must do the same block lettering as they use when they address their envelopes to you (any other color of ink or cursive writing earned my daughter more pushups).  I NEVER print because I don't like my printing so I just would write like I usually do.  Boy, was I wrong. . again, more pushups.  Make sure when you are writing their address and zip code and if there is a zero in it you must put a diagonal line through it too.  Every letter that I wrote to her that wasn't correct, she got more push ups.  Then one day I just started putting the line through the zero and she had to do pushups for telling me (which she did not).  She said it was fine because she did fantastic at the final pushup tests (I guess she had a lot of practice).  This may have been just her RDCs but I thought I would pass along what we learned. 

[Tina (4/9/12)]

well put Navy Momma - let the tears roll and get it all out of your system so when you hear his voice you don't break down and cry.  we have to be very strong for them and they don't have to know that our hearts are breaking.  good luck

[Colleen SHIP-13 DIV -309]

ok, well... I did it.....

and it was ROUGH.... Holy hell.. no matter what anyone tells you, no matter if your kids have previously moved out, gone to college ect... NOTHING prepares you for the emotions of sending your kid to boot camp..But I did it.. and I am surviving... RIGHT up t the point where the next person says.. "How are you?".. then I'm a mess....

But I did it... and I am waiting patiently for my letter and my Kid in the Box....

I wanted to thank you.. each and every one of you who took the time to read and reply...

Every single word was a comforting blanket of understanding that I so badly needed...

You're an awesome group of people and it is easy to see why your kids chose to serve our Country.

xox

Colleen

[durrichShip03/Div354]

I'm right behind you in 4 weeks ---- it's so wonderful to read these posts...especially the ones where it says, well he's gone and I'm making it through allright.