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This by far has been the most difficult seperation ever. How do you find the strength not to fall apart...

 I am proud that my son has made this decision on his own. Strangely I am very Happy But extremely sad at the same time. He will be leaving to the recruiting station in two hours then up to Harrisburg. Then I wont see him until tomorrow when I will drive up to say goodbye. Just the thought of not seeing him for 9 weeks is beyond difficult. He is my only son, my pride and Joy..

How can I get past today and tomorrow without causing him additional stress?

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Replies to This Discussion

I thought i was the only crazy one. It is very normal to feel the way you do. It was like some one dies here when my son left on Feb 16. He is doing fine and is excited to see us. I sure understand and it does get better with time but it is one of the hardest things I have dealt with. Prayers, success and happiness to you and your son.
It will be okay!
My son has been gone since 2/10. I saw him off at MEPS and strangely I didn't cry. Took photos, which I now cherish. He had his cell phone with him so he called when he landed in Chicago just to chat while he was waiting for the shuttle to base. He was cheerful, tired, scared and happy all at the same time. Said, I love you mom. I'm going to call Dad now - THEN after hanging up the phone I came unglued. I was still at work and all I could do was cry. I've cried several more times since, but each day gets a little easier and when you get that form letter with his 4 lines at the bottom, you'll find out his graduation date so immediately join that PIR group and start a discussion if there isn't one already with your sons Ship and Div.

This site has been invaluable to me. I've connected with other moms in my sons Ship and Div and I get info from them that maybe he doesn't think to share in his letters. We also draw strength from each other.

Most of us on here are moms and even when other folks don't understand why we cry over our "grown" children, we tend to understand each other.
blessespr- It is natural for you to feel this way. My daughter left on Jan. 19th and she has her PIR on March 19th. WOOOOHOOOO!!! I can't wait to see her. Be ready to feel like you are on a roller coaster that you can't get off of. One moment I was fine and the next I was crying like a baby and mad at everyone and everything. I will tell the only way I got through this was this awesome site and all of the wonderful people I have meet through the chat room, the postings and some of the Meet and Greats that local moms had arrange. What state do you live in? There are plenty of people on here that will help you through this.
Try to be strong for him and I am sending you a message in your inbox so you can call me if needed.
God Bless and tell your son that we are all proud of him.
You are not alone!! You have come to the one place that you are surrounded by mom's that are or have felt exactly as you do right now.
You will have strong moments, weak moments, teary moments and so many others besides.
Honestly the first 2 weeks are not only tough for our recruits they are horrid for those of us left behind because our "mama bear" instinct just wants to protect them!
The one thing that made it a tiny bit better for me was knowing that my son is surrounded by hundreds of other young men and women that are going through exactly what they are. Just as you are and you are surrounded by us!!
I would love to be able to say that the time will fly by but I have not gotten to that point yet! :)
I have gone through getting his "kid in a box" and yup you have more tears available for that day!! Then came the form letter with his wonderful (albiet sloppy) handwriting on the envelope and his precious 4 lines of writting at the end.....yes many of us still carry that darn thing around with us just to feel closer....see we are there with ya!
Hold on sweetie you will survive this.....we don't like it but we will survive it!!
We handed them our wonderfully loving and precious "young men" and will be amazed to see the "Navy Men" that they are on graduation day!

(((((((HUGE NAVY MOM HUGS)))))) to you!!

hi blessedpr. I felt the same way the couple weeks before he left and then the day before and of. My son was also excited and nervous at the same time. I tried to just be present and supportive during those two days so he could be in touch with his feelings and not be concerned about me. i wanted it to be about him! when I was alone i was able to cry. my husband felt very different - he wasnt sad but happy for him-said it was time for him to move on. for me, it feels like the day he went off to kindergarden - a passage for him and us. my husband and i are empty nesters now and realize our child raising days are over. so there are a couple things going on there for me. like all moms here i am happy for my son that he is moving on with his life. he doesnt need me anymore, i probably need him emotionally more than he needs me. the house is eerily quiet now and i still feel a bit lost. change is good just takes time to recalibrate. hang in there, do nice things for yourself and feel the loss. take care!
He will always be your pride and joy!! I feel the same way about my son! When he left for BC on 1/21 I thought I was going to die. But, things do get better. Just wait til you start getting letters from him and then each letter he will sound more confident. Mine will graduate this Friday and I absolutely cannot wait! Just know that we are all here for you and will help you in any way that we can! We've all been through it! Take care and treasure the time that you do have with him tomorrow!
Stay strong & upbeat in front of him. You can do like I did. Cried all the way home after he was sworn in & left for the airport. I didn't want him to see me cry cause I knew this is a stressfull time for him
Trust me, as a mom, you can make it through anything. I truly believe all of us here have felt or are feeling the same thing. Probably the best thing about this one is a stranger to any of your feelings. And, I know saying "it will get easier" doesn't help, but maybe it gets bearable.

My son left last September, and even though he had been an hour away in college, this seperation tore me apart. The not being able to call to check on him or the random "I love you texts" he used to send left a huge void. But, my focus changed when I realized that I could get a call from in at any point in the day or night. I started carrying my cell around with me every where I my bra so I could feel it vibrate...never putting it down. The first call...after the "I'm here"...came while my husband and I were walking through Sam's (a warehouse store). I did pretty good when we talked, but the minute he had to hang up my knees buckled and I balled like a baby. I think I embarassed my husband terribly! They weren't sad tears, though...more of a relief to hear his voice and know he was ok. I got a few more of those calls...cried when I missed the calls (that's when I started putting the phone in the bra!!!)....and leaned heavily on the support of these ladies here.

Once you get that form letter and find out more information, join the group. Find out what ladies in the group have facebook and add them to your facebook. That was amazing for me. I posted the letters my son wrote to did the other moms/wives. It was nice to see what my son thought was important to send and what others sent. I sent LOTS of questionnaires for him to fill out. He said he loved them because I made them up of all the questions I wanted the answers to and knew he would forget when he got a little letter-writing time on Sunday.

Another thing someone wrote to me when I was just boarding this roller coaster ride was..that I raised him. I knew him better than anyone else. And, I knew I raised him to be a strong, powerful son who could face and conquer any challenge they put before him. And, so far, he has. He's now stationed in Pensacola ~ for A school ~ and doing well.
I wish you the best and remind you to lean on these ladies here. They are all a powerful source of comfort and knowledge. I'm not sure I would have made it to PIR in one piece without them.
more Navy mom hugs!!!
I feel your pain.. I am also having difficult time.. The tears we cry... I miss him so much and pray for their safety. I just received his box and form letter. That was very hard and difficult. My son is on ship 7, div 207...
I have less than 20 days to go before I see him.
In our conversations he has told me how difficult it is and how he at times hates it.
My heart aches but I try to stay positive and encourage him.
I tell him to do the math and just see how far he has already gotten.

This journey has been tough. I have not cried this much in my life.
there are so many things that I was not prepared for and talks I wish I had had with my son before.
but it will all be over soon and then we have the rest of our lives..

I am so proud..

((Navy Hugs)) Iris


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