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Comment by CO-TwinSalorsMom on April 4, 2014 at 9:38pm

He finds it fascinating. Which sounds very positive .

Comment by CO-TwinSalorsMom on April 4, 2014 at 9:31pm

Heard from my seller today he's doing well and power school he thinks it's actually a little easier than a school was

Comment by LadyGoggle on April 4, 2014 at 6:56pm

Hello all, 

First of all, I want to say how grateful I have been to Navy Mom social media, like this group and the Facebook support group I turned to when my son was in FIT. The encouragement I received in the four weeks it took him to finally pass his run was so valuable and kept me from going nuts. He classed up at GC in late January, and almost immediately had trouble passing his run. Again. As for the academics, he has done far better than he even imagined he would do, usually scoring very high. He is currently maintaining a 3.6.

But this isn't why I am commenting. About three weeks ago, he suddenly was very quiet. Whereas he normally would text me several times a week and skype on the weekends, he fell silent. When he finally skyped us, his conversation was distressing. He kept saying he should have gone to college, and he was visibly stressing. All because of the run. He was even doubting that the successful run that allowed him to leave boot camp was accurate. One bright spot was all the support he was getting from his new buddies. He reported they were all in his corner, helping him to train.

Finally a breakthrough happened. One of his buddies observed that his gait looked weird. He observed that my son's stride seemed too short. My son, who is 6' 2" and skinny, was not running his full stride. He was probably "overthinking" his run. (In high school, he was not required to take PE because he was a band geek. Living inside his head, he literally did not know how to run.) He did an informal run with this new stride, and he beat his BC run by 13 seconds.

And this leads me to why I am writing. He finally divulged that his class's chief had been really riding him, ridiculing him a lot because he wasn't passing the run. I thought, well, this is the military. They don't coddle. But, now I am wondering if this guy may be a bit more than just a higher up who uses a stick rather than a carrot.

On Monday, my son reported to his chief that he had finally passed his run, informally. The chief said he didn't believe him. So, on Tuesday, when my son was going to do an assessment, the chief, who my son reports is rarely around when anyone needs him, showed up to observe, saying he had to see for himself. When my son made the time, successfully, all the chief did was stare at him for 45 seconds, wordlessly. Then, when the verification sheet was passed to him to sign, the chief signed it, then threw it on the ground saying, disgustedly, "I'm done here," turned on his heels and stalked off.

Wow, what was that about? It was almost as if he wanted my son to fail. He has also said that at GC there is a lot of pressure for all the nukes to pass because they need them out of school and on to the fleet. One would think that a chief's first priority is to help all the nukes to succeed. If I didn't know better, it sounds as if his chief was counting on seeing him fail. My son did say that if he hadn't passed this week, the chief probably would have inserted a black mark in his record.

Anyway, my son has moved from Phase 1 to 3 now, and he says his buddies were fighting over who would spend liberty with him this weekend, his first in civilian clothes. This is even more amazing because one of the hardest things for him in high school was not having any close friends, except for ones he made in elementary school. We kept telling him that life would be better after high school!

Thanks for all your support!

Comment by susank on April 4, 2014 at 6:16pm

My son has been in for over five years and is on his last deployment. I could never ever have gotten through the running silent without N4M. It has been my lifeline and I will be forever grateful. I don't know anyone at home that has a family member in the military. The first thing I do every morning is go on N4M while enjoying my morning coffee. I am sad where there are no posts. Posts are almost as good as getting word from my son. Well almost:) I really will have to leave this site slowly or I will have withdrawals.

Comment by Robin - Nuke ET on April 4, 2014 at 4:16pm

Your snippets help me tremendously.  I'm going to take a cue from you and hopefully help someone else out there. My closest and dearest friends have no idea what this feels like...but all of you do.  I thank you for that.  Hugs to all...

Comment by NancyJo (NNPTC) on April 4, 2014 at 4:11pm

Me too. My son is past what a lot of you are going through now but still I linger. I guess it's like a lot of other things...you don't really know until you have experienced it. In so many of the old photos from WWII, Viet Nam, whatever, you see lots of pics of wives, girlfriends, husbands, babies. Not a lot of parents. That's OK, we're important in a different way, but our hearts ache anyway. Places like this are that common thread. It helps me to know I'm not alone and I hope in some small way my occasional little snippets might help somebody else.

Comment by Robin - Nuke ET on April 4, 2014 at 4:04pm

I so agree Cybermom.  I don't post a lot here because I don't feel like I have nearly as much to offer as our veterans moms (and dads too) but I so appreciate being able to come here and chat with all of you...I am so grateful!

Comment by Cybermom on April 4, 2014 at 3:58pm

I was at a workshop last weekend on the use of social media for promoting professional agendas and programs. The facilitator asked if we used the Internet (including Facebook and Twitter) for anything more than cute videos of puppies.  No one else did but I raised my hands and talked about how places like N4M and FB private pages have been lifesavers, and how we have all benefitted in so many ways.

And then I started to cry...and to appreciate what we have, how did those who went before us cope when their loved ones left, and there was no such thing as texting, Skype and FaceTime?  We are lucky to have these, and we're lucky to have each other.

Comment by tina41 on April 4, 2014 at 2:49pm

hello all!!

robin--hang in there!!  we all are crying with you!!    my son has been in for a couple years and I still cry when we part ways.  

Comment by B'sNukeMoM⚓️MMN(Vet) on April 4, 2014 at 1:56pm

Hang in there Robin!  I'm so glad you got to have him home for a month but yeah it's never easy saying goodbye :( 

{{{hugs}}} to you!

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