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Comment by navymom9875 on August 13, 2010 at 11:49am

Thanks for the info, snowmc! After reading about the "box" I thought that if I was going to receive one I would want to know in advance because it sounds like something that could be upsetting if you didn't know to expect it. Also, thanks for your willingness to answer questions. My son enters OCS in October and with the help of this board I think I know as much or more than he does about it.

Comment by snowmc on August 13, 2010 at 11:35am

gdawg: no...their personal items are stored for them until OCS is complete...usually in someone's car. At least that's how it was for my son last January. Good luck...stay in touch here...we've all been through it and will be more than happy to answer any questions!

Comment by navymom9875 on August 13, 2010 at 10:21am

I've read several posts about parents receiving a box of "personal effects" after their sailor enters boot camp. They say the box contains all the civilian clothes, shoes etc. that their sailor had with them when entering boot camp. Is this something that is also done in OCS?

Comment by LZ27 on August 11, 2010 at 10:43am

When my son was in college I rarely heard from him. News almost always filtered through his sister. Now tha he is in OCS that has not changed. He lived with his dad, so understandably that was the next in line to give info. when he was in college at least I knew where he was, where he could be reached, and mostly wht he ws up to. (LoL). Now this is different and I heard very little from him while in Newport. He will be at Port H for a few months and then to Ft Worth for two years. Do I anticipate answers to email, letters, phone calls. Not really. that is my son. As long as I get info that he is ok....I will be ok (I hope/think). Will I continue to write and send packages...you bet. It has not changed nor doo I think it will. I just hang in there.

Comment by spensmom on August 11, 2010 at 9:45am

Sally, My heart aches for you. That is my worst nightmare that my son would marry someone who might pull him completely away from us....on purpose or not. However, knowing my son, I believe that wouldn't happen but you never know. Hang in there.

Speaking of communications.....it is true that there are times they can't communicate at all because of the situation they are in onboard ship. I look every day for an e-mail but ask myself.......how much did you actually communicate with your parents when you were out on your own!? Perhaps it is because of their job that we worry so much and want to hear from them more.

Speaking of e-mails, got one this morning saying they were in port.....so, for the moment, I am no longer worrying about the Chinese lurking behind them! Yay!

Comment by egbot on August 11, 2010 at 7:28am

Okay, you guys are scaring me. I'm a long way off before my LO gets deployed as he is just graduating OCS next Friday and then still has to go to NUPOC for 1.5 years! Presently, he is not married and unattached. However, a mom is always a mom. You only get one! Try reminding those LO"s of yours that Mom was the first woman to ever love them!! I have no clue if my son will do this, but I'd better have a sit down with him before he goes anywhere! I have enough grey hair as it is and Clairol can only do so much!!! : }

Comment by BunkerQB on August 11, 2010 at 12:39am

@con3han, here is the flip side of life as a Navy officer mom (or how can a mom go from being sane to insame).

I can't close my eyes at night. I grind my teeth in my sleep. I can't stay focused during the day. No new is good news was starting to wear thin. Walked in the door yesterday, saw his number on the caller ID. He is alive! Hallelujah, I thought. We finally made contact a hour later. While we have been wringing our hands over him, he has been sitting in an air-conditioned building in DC, taking some class. He never mentioned he would be going there. He wouldn't stop over in San Fran (from HI to DC) without seeing old mom and dad, would he?
Me. Why did you have to go to DC?
Him. Oh, just part of the class.
Me. You didn't mentioned it before.
Him. I didn't?
Me. How long where you there?
Him. Four, five, six days.
Me. It's too bad you couln't have stopped over in SF to see us and your girlfriend.
Him. Weeellll, actually she came with me.
That is that. LOL. No further explanation necessary. It never crossed his mind to invite US. Thank God, my younger son does not have a girlfriend yet.
con3han, where are you?

Comment by BunkerQB on August 8, 2010 at 11:56pm

My son is on a sub. We have not heard from him in 4 weeks. We expect WHEN he can, he will email us. In the meantime, we know he is out there doing his job which requires secrecy and no communications with loved ones. The longest stretch we had was about 10 weeks. YES, this is all the information that you are allowed to have. My son didn't even tell me he was leaving. " I am fine, what are you worried about" is NOT their attitude. They are not being cavalier about going away and not contacting you. They are in the Navy, a military organization. Sometimes they are in harm's way. They do what they have to do to protect themselves and to protect us. Don't call anyone higher on the chain of command to inquire. If this sounds harsh, it's because we are officer moms. We are expected to have a stiffer upper lip. Do I worry? Of course. I have many sleepless night. Occasionally, I yearn for the days long gone when he was an affectionate toddler and sleeping soundly in his bed every night. On other occasions when I am particularly sentimental, I even long for the terrible teenage years.
con3han, I hope this help you.

Comment by Paymaster on August 8, 2010 at 11:40pm

con3han....The length of you son's deployment will depend on if he is on a boomer or fast attach sub. They differ in length. All the subs will at some point during their deployment come up and do what they call a dump. That's when you will get an e-mail and it maybe from an address you do not recognize.


Like many of us you will learn to live with NNIGN (No news is good news).

Try to stay busy. Try not to dwell on not knowing.

We have now changed rolls, we are not the parents, we are now the listeners.

Stay strong.

Comment by Paymaster on August 7, 2010 at 11:29am

LorrieA......I know that feeling. My DIL is not one to just call us, don't get me wrong we have a great relationship, and she is the greatest DIL in the world, but it usually my son who calls. One Sat morning the phone rang and it was her. I could tell by her voice that something was wrong. Turns out she was calling to tell us our son had to have his appendix removed and was in surgery at the moment. At the time they lived in Va and we are in CA and that he had the aprendix attach in the early morning and she didn't want to wake us up because of the time change. I was relieved when she told us, but at the same time I had been holding my breath.

Stay strong.

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