Boot Camp Moms (and loved ones)

LMCinTN - BNMHs!!  (Big Navy Mom Hugs!!) Yes, You are going to make this too!!! If I could just reach through cyber space and give you a hug, I would.  

As BelovedbyHim shares - "We haven't lost a mom to BC and we aren't going to start now."  You have your marching orders and that is to keep those letters coming. I would share some things with my son about what was going on at home. We had lots of friends from church who had military understanding and they offered to write letters to my son. I would suggest that you share the "letter writing guidelines" that are above and to the right with them though. 

It really helped me to not feel like I had to be the only one showing love and support. 

BTW - I have welcomed several new moms whose SRs have similar rates. I think some of you have posted on a group page. 

Also, I know we have some new members at least to the site who are from the same state. Be sure to visit each other's profile pages (click on their icon) and also read my discussion - Private Messages - Creating & Sending + OPSEC

Also be sure to connect with each other in your PIR groups. I don't join each one of those created but our admins can help as able. 

Goodmorning all, I've really been struggling with my son shipping out last Tuesday. It's an overwhelming feeling. I have been reading all the comments & it does give me some comfort, so thank you all for that. I know I'll get through this but geez it's tough. Does anyone know if my son shipped out to greatlakes last week will his graduation be September? I don't have too much details, but I'd like to start planning since I'm in CA. Thank you ladies <3

Hi Nicole0704! My son left Tues the 28th...same Tues as your son? Their graduation should be in Sept. My guess is Friday of Labor day weekend or the next. We won't know until we receive our form letters. I'm opposite of you in Mass and I'm excited to start planning too! What job did your son choose?

Can anyone tell me what would hold up my letters from getting to him? He’s been there for 4 weeks & he’s only received 2/6. He’s getting homesick & wants letters & I can’t even tell him they’re coming.

Yes, he left on the 28th as well. My son originally chose a builder as his job, but his recruiter offered him to go to boot camp earlier, which he did so his job might change. 

too funny! My son wanted to be a Seabee but no jobs were available. His 2nd choice was Master at Arms. He was offered to leave early too but he was able to keep his job.

Hi Broadwaydancer5, I started writing to my son on an app called "sandboxx". You do pay for your letters , but they are sent over night and you can attach a picture. 

Yes! I sent 2 now from there. He got the first one & my second letter I hand wrote. My second Sandboxx letter is being held up because of the holiday, but hopefully this past week he got more of my handwritten ones. 

Welcome to our new members!!!!  (I am not the usual welcome committee lol but I know Chipmunk is visiting loved ones and not sure if she will be on)

I’ll try my best but I know I’ll be wrong on some things!  Anyway, I’m Shanny. My son left two years ago this month for boot camp. (I can’t believe he is starting year 3 already!). The ladies here got me through some seriously crazy times with bootcamp and going into the fleet   And just so you know, I have made lifelong friends with the moms here. They are amazing! 

so, the mail…. My understanding is that the mail can be unpredictable at times. Each training group trains people to handle the mail. And while they are being trained, mail delivery can be messed up at times. I started typing every letter I sent. Then I numbered the envelopes. That way my son could tell me in his letter back that he received letters 1, 2, 4 & 6. Then I would resend what he was missing. Others have used Sandboxx. I never did. The biggest issue with that app is that nothing you send is private. While it may be faster, you are giving a company whatever information you send to your SR. So if you use it, use it for encouragement not for anything private or personal. And no matter what. NEVER use it outside of bootcamp. It puts too much sensitive information into non-military hands. 

as for guessing PIR dates, we have moms who have it down to a science!  Sadly, I am not one of them. I am a COVID bootcamp survivor. Our dates changed all the time. For initial quarantines to being pushed back because elf exposure…. We never knew when PIR really was until we got the call that bootcamp was done. It used to be count 9 Fridays starting from the week your SR arrived.  But bootcamp has been extended and I’m not sure what it is now..

sorry I am no help. But I wanted to make sure to say hello. And let you know you are not alone. You have found a great place full of supportive moms (and some dads) just like you. Please know that no question is a stupid question. Someone will try to answer, if we can’t, we will find someone else who can. 

Oh and I post on my phone and make all kinds of hilarious and inappropriate at times mistakes lol. I have no patience for rereading my messages but get extremely made and my typos and strange autocorrects. Please forgive me

@Shanny...we call that fat fingers LOL

@Q's Momma...thank you for sharing your son's dates 

You new Ladies are doing such a awesome job helping each other out, it really touched my heart. Actually you are suppose to count 10 Fridays from the day they arrive but if your recruit comes in on a Thursday or Friday you might have to add a extra Friday. That being said it might not mean a thing. My son went in early 2020 which was right at the beginning of the Covid Pandemic, so the first month went pretty smooth on that factor but when he got there he had to wait for his division to fill up, it was right after the holidays so his original 8 weeks turned into 10 weeks. There are so many factors like holidays and recruit numbers that might change things also so please stay flexible. 

Good Afternoon Nicole0704 and nursekim - I am going to take a guess that your PIRs will be Labor Day weekend or the next one, based on the new 10 week BC time. You may feel free to join the September PIR and if you find out from your form letter that it is actually in August you may join that group. 

My son left for BC the last week in June, 5 years ago. His PIR was the last weekend in August, but BC was 8 weeks. Some SRs that arrive earlier in the week, might get put with another division and pushed through to the previous PIR group. 

Nicole0704 - we call this the emotional roller coaster. Different moms handle this time differently. For some of us, it hurts, but we stay busy enough with other things, other kids, or projects that we manage to make it through. Others will be like BelovedbyHim or Phoenixmom share - "They were a HOT MESS!" - No matter what, we manage to make it through and while it might not get easier, we get stronger. My mother told me when my husband was gone for a two-week summer training, and I was feeling sorry for myself, and very down - "... just keep in mind that while you miss your husband, and he is not here to help you with __ (our two year old), that you have family around you to support you. Your husband has no one. He is out working in the hot summer and heat, listening to drill sergeants yelling at him. Don't you think he misses you?" It wasn't necessarily what I wanted to hear, but it did give me a different perspective, and it managed to help me through my son's BC days. 

As for flying to BC, I would definitely plan for changeable or refundable tickets and motel rooms - only AFTER you at least have the form letter. I have become much more adaptable to the "flexibility" aspects of Navy Mom life - almost to so, that with my older daughter who is used to my A-type personality, plan out everything, be in control of everything, that I can't plan a trip to see her unless I give at least a month's notice - which is hard for me, not knowing what my sailor's schedule might be. 

LOL - I was reading messages in my email feed and responded to the first ones but did not see the rest of the replies. I am at least glad my last post ended up here where it was supposed to. Sometimes they do not post at all and sometimes they are on the previous page. 

To all of our new members, I so appreciate Shanny and Northwoodsmom sticking around and encouraging all of you and covering for me! I do have a free moment, so wanted to share, I did not realize they had posted already. Ummi has also been posting recently and a few others. Partyofseven hasn't been able to be on as much, but she also has helped out on this group. 

Q's Momma - It sounds like you have gotten your form letter and so my calculations for the others should hopefully line up with the Sept 9th date, based on my son's situation. That said, Northwoodsmom is correct that sometimes there are "push divisions". Wow - you have a long way to come but I also need to make sure that I keep in contact with you, if I ever should get the opportunity to come to Hawaii!! - I would suggest for you that, if at all possible, give yourself a couple of extra days before and after PIR so that if there are any flight issues you can deal with those and not miss out on PIR. At least when my son was at BC, most of the motels were very understanding of the changeableness of PIR and many had a day of reservation cancellation policy. My point, the hotels are likely to be much more flexible than the airlines. 

Broadwaydancer5 - Did you receive a call from your SR or a letter from him? If you received a letter, it is likely that there is just a cross in time with the mail. In other words, they will tell you in a letter - since initially at least, they can only write on Sunday, that they have not received any letters, but once the mail starts coming in, those letters will soon catch up to them. So, just keep writing. 

 Here is the information that Lemonelephant posted several years ago - Letter writing and fun stuff/questionnaire - she explains a little bit of the delay, but like Shanny said - be sure to number your letters. Also, I think Sandboxx, might get to GL faster than USPS mail, but once at RTC, it still requires the mailroom petty officer to be trained and deliver mail to the divisions. 

Here is B'sNukeMom's Sandboxx App for BC post. 

For those who have not signed up for the USPS Informed Delivery - here is the link to that page - Informed Delivery (usps.com) . 

I wrote emails to my son, and then I printed those out and mailed them with a handwritten note added to each one. I also gave his address to others who wrote him. Be sure to share with them the guidelines from the Letter writing page above. 

My letters usually arrived on Thursday of each week. And almost every one of them started out with "I only have ten minutes to write!" 

I did not get a call, as I’m just the gf! Lol! But he was on watch duty so he couldn’t call his mom last weekend either. I have received like 7 letters from him. But he said he hadn’t received anymore after the 2 the second week I sent. I’m hoping when I get his letter this week it will say he got more of them! I sent a Sandboxx Thursday night saying I had sent 6 that way he knows that I am at least writing! He’s just going into week 5 of being there so I was worried they got lost since the mail room should be a little more organized with them having trained the mail recruits. I’ve been doing well not having him here but knowing he’s sad & lonely is making it very tough & upsetting that my letters aren’t getting to him as quickly as I’m writing them. It’s been weeks.

Broadwaydancer5 - Let's hope that mostly, he had not received your first letters when he wrote his letter. We had a lot of that happen when the SRs were dealing with the covid ROMs and set backs. Some moms did not even receive their form letters and we had people all over the place trying to help them figure out what division their sons were in. 

I recall you were the GF, but you are just as welcome here and being willing to let his mom receive the calls is very kind and considerate!! Just keep writing, praying and loving even from a distance!! 

That's me!!!  Two years later, still waiting on the form letter!  Then they stamped over his address so I had everyone looking at it trying to read the address. Then I sent a picture of it to his recruitment office and all of the recruiters sat around trying to read it lol good times

Thank you!! He said he’d call his mom then I would be the next call, so hopefully he’ll get some calls for doing well. He’s a leader for his group, so maybe. 

Shanny - I could not remember if that was you or Katharine - I remember we had to go looking for her "lost puppy". 

Braodwaydancer5 - As the MIL to my sailor daughter, I am thankful that I have a wonderful relationship with her. They did not meet until on the same ship together so all through BC and his schooling, even his first year on the ship, I was always the first call home. As their relationship evolved and they became husband and wife, the first calls went to his wife, but she was already keeping me informed of things going on with my sailor and their ship, so I never had any feelings of jealousy. It is important for both moms and girlfriends to keep communication lines opened as best as possible. You both love the same man and allowing him to honor his mother, is a way for you to honor her, as well as sharing information with her. Hopefully, she will sense your kindness and gratitude to her as well and keep the lines of communication open with you. 

Q's Momma - I can't remember if I posted my discussion above about flying out of GL recently or not. If you have trouble finding it above, I will post it here for you.  Do be sure to come join the Nuke Moms Group- You will want to join us and connect with information that we have there for you as well. Most likely your sailor will fly out early on Saturday morning, but maybe not. Those sailors staying in GL will probably have a holiday standdown on Labor Day weekend. If your sailor flies out of O'Hare or one of the other local airports, you have a good chance to go to the airport and spend time with them at the gate before they leave. But know that they will likely leave for the airport in the very wee early hours of the morning, and my son's flight went out at 0630 in the morning!! 

Also - PLEASE NOTE: Just because you receive a form letter with a PIR date, that is not set in stone!!! Stay flexible, plan still for changeable airline flights. 

Nicole0704 -- You are in the right place!  It's ok to be feeling overwhelmed! We are here to help you get your bearings and Navigate the next few weeks!!!  My Sailor is a SeaBee Builder (BU). Feel free to PM me if you want more info on this AMAZING Rate!!  He would have known before he left if he had a different job. They don't usually change rates at BC unless something major happens to cause them to need to re-rate.  (Usually a spec-ops where they cannot meet the requirements)  Otherwise that can happen at A school usually for the Nuke rates.
For you and nursekim Your timeline should look something like this:
Tuesday June 28-- Ship out Day 0
Processing day 1--3 June 29 - July 1
P- Hold Weekend July 2 & 3, Holiday P-Hold July 4
P-Days 4 & 5-- July 5&6
Assuming no Quarantine then Training Week 1 Day 1 would be July 7.  Your weeks would then count forward on that same day of the week.
You are looking at PIR on Sept 9 or Sept 16 if for any reason P-days take longer (there are a bunch of reasons why this may happen that are not a reason to be concerned.)  The only way to know 100% is to wait to hear from your SR but this will give you a rough idea of when to expect that your SR should have PIR.

Broadwaydancer5 -- Mail can be delayed for several reasons, and yes sometimes it does get lost or "Rerouted".  That's part of why we suggest a copy at home and numbering the envelopes.  99.9% of the time it shows up though.  It is usually just a matter of letters crossing in the mail. Try and send "Snail Mail" letters more often and if you use Sandboxx do that only once a week!

Shanny -- You did a wonderful job!  You'll get the hang and even if you don't just continue to be encouraging and that will be enough!

Q’s Momma -- That's going to be a tight timeline but you may get extra time with your sailor depending on where is A school is!

AWWWWW I remember how worried we were for our "Lost Puppy". We also had our "NM Posse" ready to go to GL and take on the Navy single handed to get info on what was happening with all the new SR's!!

Good Morning Everyone!! Happy Independence Day!! 

As I have shared, my son went to BC at the end of June, 5 years ago. Fourth of July was always a special holiday for him. We are not allowed to have fireworks in our area, so the various towns, churches, ball fields, symphonic orchestra, all put on large displays. They occur over several nights as well. With several young ones, we usually would find a location to watch the fireworks from a distance - sometimes, due to our landscape we could see displays from several of the surrounding cities also at the same time. 

My son grew up loving the displays and listening to all the patriotic songs as well. His favorite though was Lee Greenwood's - God Bless America - There are several YouTube versions of this but here is a recent one that was done. God Bless the U.S.A featuring Lee Greenwood, Home Free and The Sing...

Feel free to share a favorite song, or holiday memory of your SR and this special day. My SR had nothing special for 4th of July, it was treated like a "holiday" or Sunday but no fireworks for him. His duty has called him to stand watch most every 4th of July since then. It is one of the sacrifices that they make for our freedom. 

Hi All, Happy Foutrh of Julv!

Well got a call from Bud about an hour ago, he said Mom Im officially out of the Navy today! Never heard him so Happy in a long time! All his paperwork was submitted again and was completed. It Happened really quick! So My Son in Law will be flying to washington with my Grandson and will be driving Bud home with his things. Not sure when this is happening but im guessing soon! Just thought I would let you all know.

For those dont know it is officially 5 yrs my son has been in, didnt re-.enlist said he had enough. So he will be home soon.

Congratulations to all of you new Moms out there, keep your head up and be positive, its a long ride ahead!!

@Phoneixmom was his whole contract 5 years or does he have some reserve left?

they can call him back because its 8 yrs total but he can do reserves for the rest of the 3 yrs. but right now until then if they call him back, he is home bound

Thank you!  I thought most contracts were a total of 8.  My son is 3 active and 5 reserve (he just graduated and is now in a school).  Congratulations on having your son home!!!

ALLI Congrats to your Son.

My son was stationed on Coronado Island for 4 yrs. and 1 yr. in Bremerton WA. he was on the USS Theodore for all 5 yrs. was on about 4 deployments. of course we all heard about the covid pandemic that was on the carrier. it was a mess

Okay, I hope this is clear enough, I was trying to type while hubby and others were talking!

Inactive Ready Reserves - is what everyone who goes in has to deal with for up to 8 years, unless they reenlist. Typically, people do a 4-year contract and then 4 years IRR. For Nukes their contract is 6 years with an option to do Star-Reenlistment for an additional 4 years. 

It essentially requires an act of Congress officially declaring war to get called back into reserves. If war is declared, then

Active Duty is called up first,

Then the Active Ready Reserves, commonly called reserves who do 1 weekend a month and 15 days a summer (but can vary and get more), they get sent out second. 

Finally, the Inactive Ready Reserves will be called. 

You are obligated for 8 years from your initial signing date (swearing in) to the country, if you are needed, regardless of your contract years or rate. 

For those members who have now attended PIR or have received your "I'm a sailor" call, I would like to encourage you to come join our Beyond BC - Navy For Moms (ning.com).

I do request that if your loved one is still at BC, to wait until after your PIR or sailor call before joining. 

Phoenixmom - Please tell your Bud, Thank you for his service!. I know that you are looking forward to having him back home!

Alli - My son's contract is for 6 years. My DIL's was 4 years and then reenlisted for another 4, so her 8 years were covered and because of her next schooling. She has a different rate than my son does. I also left you a message. 

Qs Momma   My son is also headed to Nuke school - some time after yours - he ships to BC on Monday. Savoring each moment until then. 

Hope you all had a wonderful 4th!  We spent the day on the lake with our kids and my brother who came up to see my son one last time before he ships off to BC. Hard to believe I'll be saying good bye in less than a week. It's starting to hit me pretty hard. Grateful to have found these groups for the support and encouragement and to hear your stories of "survival" and your children's navy journeys.  

(I know it's not Christmas, but I'm sure we could all use a hug anyhow.)

Be sure to join your PIR group.  Here are the links:

PIR SEPTEMBER 2022

PIR AUGUST 2022

PIR JULY 2022

BNMHs to everyone!

(That is Big Navy Mom Hugs!)

I just got linked to my son on Sandboxx! My sisters got a text too. I need to be patient and wait until I get his form letter to write though!!

nursekim - WooHoo!! Yes, unfortunately, without that address from the form letter, there is no guarantee that your Sandboxx letter would actually get delivered to him in his division any faster. But at least you have something that you can feel in control of. 

Speaking of Control - I think one of the hardest things for me as a parent, whether it was with my girls first, or my boys - letting go of being the one somewhat totally in control of their life, the plans for what we were doing as a family, or them individually with activities - learning to let go is hard.

But it wasn't really until I attended PIR and that day did not even go like others had said it would (Which is why I wrote my discussion above about what PIR might look like for those flying out) - that I became much better at learning flexibility. 

SEMPER GUMBY - as we refer to it around here. I had a pastor tell me, you have to learn how to bend, so you don't break. I have definitely learned how to bend in the last 5 years that my son has been in the Navy. In fact, I bend so much that I no longer plan anything until almost the last minute - which doesn't help my oldest daughter who still takes after my A-type personality with lots of planning!!

The funny thing is - my DIL is a sailor as well, but she has not been on the parent side of planning. Only recently though did she find herself in the position of being wife and trying to plan around 2 sailor's leave schedules (one being a ship's schedule also) so they could take a vacation together. Since the end of May, I have spent several phone calls with her, trying to encourage her not to lose hope, as they had to juggle and rearrange things. 

Becoming Navy flexible is a process - give yourself grace and time to grow, just like your loved one is growing into a sailor at BC. 

FYI - If your loved one has left for BC, be sure to change their status on your profile page to notate that. If your loved one has completed PIR and is now a sailor, then rejoice and change their status to Enlisted. 

Some other groups on this site that might be of interest - 

Christian Navy Moms

Moms of Daughters 2

Emptynesters

Blue Star Mothers Group

We just said our goodbyes in the hotel lobby, he leaves for BC in the morning.

We got a phone call from our SR over the weekend!   It had been about 2 1/2 weeks since the I have arrived phone call.  It was soo good to hear his voice.  He assured me that it wasn't that hard and that things were good.  We were able to talk around 40 minutes.  Although, it felt like five.  Can't wait for the next one!

Good Morning Everyone!!

WooHoo! - Phone calls those are the best!! 

Momof1 - It sounds like you received one of the "Still Alive" phone calls. I am glad that he sounded so good and was able to reassure you some. 

For others - Keep in mind that "No News is Good News" always holds - phone calls are privileges, as well as divisions needing to work together so they can be ready to go to the phone banks when a spot is available. Some SRs will have other jobs that do not allow them to make a call with the rest of their division. 

Also, it is not uncommon for that first call around 3 weeks or so to sound very down and for your SR to need some encouragement. 

Cindi@FrostyAcres - I left a msg on your profile page! BNMHs!  

For others with loved ones waiting to head to BC - We did not go to the motel the night before with our son, because MEPS was in our hometown. We were able to attend his swearing in, I don't know if those have opened back up after shutdown, but some places were posting them on their FB page. Just double check, hopefully, the recruiter knows.  After swearing in, my son and the other SRs were transported to the airport. I was told by that driver (seemed like a burley older man who thought mothers coddled their sons that we could not follow), later I found out that what the recruiter had told me might have been a possibility that we could have met him at the airport and before we went through TSA gone to the airline gate and received a gate pass to go through security (with all proper ID), and been able to wait at the gate with him until his flight left. 

I realize that COVID has changed some of the options, but over the last 5 years, there have been times when taking our sailor back to the airport to fly back after leave, we have gone to the airline gate with him. 

TEXAS Moms - Good Morning, I have welcomed a few of you or reached out to you on your profile pages. Be sure to go to your Texas' Moms - Navy For Moms (ning.com) group page and go to the comments area on that group and post a hello. I believe they have a FB page, but I also find it is a great option to meet each other and connect. 

My discussion above - Private Messages - Creating & Sending + OPSEC - explains how to reach out and make friends on this site and how to send private messages as well as what pages or things are more visible on this site and how to make things more private. 

Welcome to new members - Amy and Yeelosub - We are glad you have joined us!! I know there are some other recent new members as well, my apologies for not specifically introducing you here. I just encourage all of you to come say hello, to connect in your PIR groups, but also post here, so we can join in conversation with you! 

Some tidbits on how to connect - if you click on someone's profile picture, it will take you to their profile page where you may read what they post and say a hello there on their page, send a friend request, or message (if friends). 

I do recommend that you all make sure your profile page is set at least to only open to members. If your SR has a very sensitive rate, you might want to consider making your profile page private. (More details in my discussion above.)

We also have several members who are sending off only children to BC. This might be something else you want to share when you post, so that maybe you can connect with others who are doing the same. You are not alone, No One is alone on this group. The more you reach out, the more we will reply. 

Welcome to all our new members! Yes do post in your PIR groups when you get your form letters letting you know the divisions. I also encourage all of you to post here on the Boot Camp page, my PIR group was very small so it was here I received most of the information, encouragement and comfort from the seasoned Moms.

You are all pretty much going through the rollercoaster of emotions, pride, excited, anxiety, fear, anger, sadness and maybe even loneliness. Believe me your not alone many of us have been there , the good news all the compassionate, caring encouraging Moms are only a post away to help you through this period and beyond. You are in great hands, they are how I made it and still are playing a huge part in my journey.

Welcome again, stop in and let us know about your journey so far!

This time last year we were getting ready to drop our son off at the hotel for the night before he flew out.. Me and all of us are with you.. we became empty nesters that night.. feel free to ask away.  

Our son joined during height of COVID, we weren't able to see the swearing in or go to the airport. We were able to have dinner with him the night before and drop him off at the hotel. The Navy took care of him from there. There weren't a lot of options for eating out at that point in our state. I told him I refused to get take out and eat it in our car under a street light in the parking lot. We found that the casino had dine in. Not sure why the rules didn't apply to them, but was sure glad we were able to sit down and have a nice meal to send him off with! Hated dropping him off at the hotel with only $20, a change of socks and a toothbrush. He kept telling me the Navy would give him what he needed. He was right. It was all good from there on out.