Married to the Navy

[koz_1316 (ship 2 div 921)]

So my sister recently got engaged… I’m trying my hardest to
be happy for her. But I just don’t know how to, when I’m jealous of her. I’m
jealous that she will have her husband, everyday right by her side. I’m jealous
that she doesn’t have to worry, worry if he’s going to get deployed. I should
say when he’s going to get deployed, and where to. I’m jealous that she doesn’t
have to be away from. She knows he will be there when she comes home.

 

She doesn’t have to taste the tears I have tasted.

 

Doesn’t have to experience all the sleepless nights. Those
nights when you want nothing more than to have your man by your side. Want him
there to cuddle with you, and tell you everything will be ok.

She won’t have to worry like I do. Worry if he’s going to
come back to her. Or just wonder, is he ok?

She will have a, what we call, “normal” life. She will never
know what it’s like for me, for us. She may say she understands, but no one truly
understands till they have lived this life.

She won’t have to see the pity in her friends and acquaintances
eyes. Oh, that look. I can’t stand that look anymore. I don’t need their pity.
I can see it in everyone’s eyes, when I say my husbands a sailor. I’m really
becoming to hate people. Hate the way they look at me. I used to love to bowl.
It was the one place I could go and forget about everyday life. But now I can’t
stand to be there. I fight with myself every Monday and Tuesday. I force myself
to go. Go to the one place I used to love so much. Force myself to do the only
thing that releases the pain. I just can’t take the pity, or that look. I’ve
seen it way to many times. It’s like they feel so bad for you, and they don’t
know what to do. They think their pity is what I need. But I don’t. It makes it
worse. I can’t even enjoy the one thing I once loved. The one thing my husband
taught me to do to. I feel them looking at me, staring. It eats me up inside.
The worst part is, we chose this life, together. We made the decision as a
team. And quite frankly, I’m proud of our decision. I’m so proud of my husband
and the opportunities we now have. I wouldn’t change our decision if I could.

See I may be jealous of her, but then I think about it, and
she should be jealous of me. I get to travel the world with my husband. Yea he
may not always be there. But at least I know he will always come back to me. I
know that while he’s away, I’m the one he’s thinking about. I’m the one who
gets him through it, as he says.

And I now realized why I went through all the hardships I did.
I used to ask God why? Why me? Why this, why now? I must admit there were times
when I lost my faith. Felt like God wasn’t there for me. So why should I believe?
But it turns out he was there, all along. He knew what lied ahead, and he
needed to prepare me for it.

So I guess what I’m trying to say is, people need to realize
what they’re doing. They may think they are helping when the truth is their
not. We don’t need pity. We need a friend. A friend who will be there when we
want to talk. One that will just listen and not gives us their pity. Because
that’s the one thing we don’t want. We don’t want pity from anyone. So as we
are embarking on this new chapter in our lives, this new adventure. I’m going
to be strong. Be the women God molded me into. For my husband. I heard a quote
the other day, and it made so much sense to me. Well it was more of a toast,
they said, “To our wives, the essentials to our success.” (Army Wives) I really
got me thinking. We kinda are. We are there when they need us, we hold things
down back home while they are gone. We are strong for them. For our husbands,
who we love and respect so much. The men who make us proud to say, I married
the military and I love every minute of it. The truth is, without our husbands,
we would not be the strong women we are today. So I’m ending with this. Live
your lives to the fullest. Take every day as it comes. Embrace the time you
have together, and miss them while they are away. Because you may never know
what the future holds.

[Sweet*Southern*Lady]

She'll never know what its like to be super wife for 6 months and get to have the joy of an 2nd honeymoon every time he comes home from a deployment. Just because he's got a normal job means he's gonna be home my dad was gone 330 days a year and he wasn't military. Also, being together every day doesn't mean that their future marriage will be any better than yours. I'm constantly surprised at how often my friends fight/argue with their significant others in my opinion we just don't have time for it.  Her husband will never experiance that first phone call in 3 weeks and hearing his bestfriend and lovers voice say she loves him.

 

Being a military loved on means that we have to be stronger and learn to appreciate all the little things. Most people don't think having a significant shop with you at Target is a big deal, but its a big deal to me after a short 3 month deployment it seems like a dream date of buy TP and cereal.  

 

I hope God will heal your heart so you can celebrate with your sister.

[montie0327]

Your sister & her life without the military are very lucky indeed.  HOWEVER, her husband isn't a HERO!  Your husband is a HERO to me, my children, my family.  Your husband is also a HERO to your children & "always" will be.  I pray for you & your family to have the strength & courage to do the job ahead of you. Remember..."YOU ARE NEVER ALONE."  God Bless you all!