First timer

[Brenda]

Hello all, thank you for this group.  My daughter left June 5th for Basic Training, any other mothers out there with a daughter that also started Basic June 5th?

[JayDee659]

Hi Brenda!  How are you doing?  My daughter has been in for almost 3 years now but I remember feeling so lost when she left for boot camp.  The support that I got from these ladies here on Moms of Daughters got me through boot camp and then some!  In fact, they're some of the best people I've ever met.  Have you heard from your daughter yet other than the "I'm here" call?  It took my daughter about 2 weeks to call then I got the first letter a few days later.  

[Brenda]

Thank you so much for the reply, no I have not heard anything yet.  I did indeed get the" I'm here" call, she was very emotional and I was surprised when I heard the screaming in the background.  I honestly am an emotional wreck.  This is all new to me, I am trying to learn all I can, I would love any advise you have to give me. 

[JayDee659]

Screaming in the background?  I'm presuming you mean instructors yelling at the new recruits.  That's common and don't take it personally.  My daughter did 4 years of ROTC in high school.  The instructors were not allowed to yell at the kids but my daughter learned the important lesson that you shouldn't take it personally.  Grab on to the information and let the rest roll off your back.  That  is going to be important throughout your daughter's career.  

The first call is scripted and I think it catches the kids by surprise.  They think they're going to get to talk to you and then they realize that they can only say what's on the paper.  It's hard for them because once they hear our voices they have to much to say!

Have you started writing yet?  I wrote daily and just added to it like a diary until I got her address.  Since I had it on computer I would add pictures of her dog to the page or local news on the marching band or ROTC, whatever would interest her, updates on Grey's Anatomy, etc.  Make sure you number and date your letters as they get them out of order.  I truly found that by writing every day it helped ease the separation anxiety a bit.  Of course nothing is like having them home but trying to keep them would be like raising a thoroughbred and never letting it have it's head and run.  

[Brenda]

Yes, I started writing day one, I was aware of the call, but that should not be what parents hear the last time they talk to their child.  It was horrifying to hear.  I think when my daughter heard my voice she broke down.  She didn't even get to say goodbye to me...

[JayDee659]

Brenda that's really hard and I think all of us moms on here feel a stab of pain when we think back on that call.  I will say that when my daughter called for the first real call, she was very upbeat.  Every so often she'd mention something to me that was going on and I'd stew about it until she called again.  Then when I'd ask her she'd say "oh that thing, no big deal that was just a thing".  As moms we need to be positive for our sailors too, they look to us for stability and understanding.  No longer can we just jump in and resolve issues, that's hard but once you get the hang of it, it's very liberating.  I'm super proud of the adult that my girl has become.  Are you planning on attending PIR?

[Brenda]

I really can't thank you enough for talking with me, you are right we can not come to the rescue anymore.  That, will be my goal from here on out.  Yes, I would not miss that for the world.  That is graduation? correct??

[JayDee659]

Yes, boot camp graduation.  It's an incredible ceremony!  Sometimes on a Friday morning I'll watch the live feed and I still get all teary waiting for them to roll up those doors and let the sailors march in!  What an incredible moment!  Haha, we took binoculars and were able to pick out our daughter pretty quickly.  She spotted us and kept blinking her eyes at me.  Was it morse code?  What was up?  When I finally got down to her she was all excited because she had purchased mascara at the NEX and was wearing it!  She never wears make up and was so excited to show me.  Silly girl :)  Love her!

[Brenda]

You have made me feel much better.  Thank you so much!!!

[JayDee659]

I'm glad it helped.  Nobody understands a Navy mom like a Navy mom.  I sent you a friend request, I see you live not too far from us!

[LL MOM]

Hi Brenda, my daughter flew out on June 6th but was at MEPS on June 5th. So I think we are on the same timeline. When my daughter called that night there was also a lot of noise in the background and she sounded like a robot. It was very hard to hear. We had a horrible good bye that day. We sat at MEPS with her for about 3 hours in the waiting room with her until it was time to go. They kept calling the recruits out in the lobby (for lunch, to do paperwork,etc.) and on the last time they just took her. All the parents in the room had no idea. I never got to hug her, say good bye or how proud of her I was. It was horrible. I miss her every day and can’t wait to see her....

[JayDee659]

Ll mom didn't they let you watch her swear in? At our MEPS they brought us all back to watch them swear in, then they had us line up and applaude as they walked out. After swearing in they all came out for hugs too. Such different experiences with the same Navy! Don't worry  you will see her before you K ow it and you will be so proud of the young woman she's become in such a short time. In the meantime write, keep yourself busy and healthy  

[Brenda]

LL MOM, Yes we are on the same timeline, I am really sorry about the experience you had at MEPS, my experience there was as JayDee explained.  I feel so bad for you, I am sure she is ok.  I cant imagine not being able to say goodbye.  Its been 4 weeks now since my daughter has been gone, I still have not gotten a call.  I am patiently waiting.  Please let me know when you hear from your girl,  Have you received any letters from her?