I know nothing...

[Patti (7/174)]

Typical parent. Evidently I know nothing even though I've probably done more research on the Navy and what my daughter will be going through. She says "Navy Mom's don't know anything, they aren't in the Navy". Well, either are YOU sweetie pie, but yet their daughter's ARE so  yes, I think they know what they are talking about...ugh...teens.

Anway, my daughter isn't doing much preparation. Isn't working out (even tho I bought her tons of stuff to work out with), barely studying (hasn't taken her real ASVAB yet, that's on Tuesday)...doesn't seem to want to do much other than sit out in the sun and sit on her bed texting people.  

I don't know how to motivate her to prepare herself for the Navy. Because after all, I know nothing. She thinks she'll be "eased" into excercising there so no need to work out now. Please, someone tell me I'm not going crazy, and how the heck do I motivate this veeeeeery unmotivated aka lazy 18 yr old.

[Fleur de lis Mom]

How did my daughter get to your house!!! She did not study for the ASVAB – she did make a good grade (could have been better with studying). She has not learned the general orders, Navy motto, etc. She thinks she still has time to learn - she has 18 more days. She is working out, but not to my standards. They are typical teens. Life in Bootcamp will be easier if they are in shape & prepared. But - the Navy does not want them to fail, it won't be easy but she will make it. There is still time for her to change; the recruiter or someone that is currently in the Navy is the best option to motivate her.

[Patti (7/174)]

She won't listen!! He told her to work out. Told her what sneakers HE uses to run (her recruiter is just on recruit assignment, it's not his normal job.) He told her what to buy or use around the house to work out. Which I bought, of course...but they sit on her floor.

She just informed me she wants to go out to her friends after she does her ASVAB. But we know she won't work out, etc. She's just sooooo impossible to live with. She keeps saying "I have time". Procrastination never worked well for ME in high school or college, so I can't see it being a good thing in the military.

[carituggle (Ship 06, Div 944)]

Patti I went through this with my daughter and you know what I just decided to spend 1 hour with her everyday before she left, no phone just us, no bickering just hanging out. Believe it or not it worked the more I backed off the more at ease she seemed and the more at ease I was, I thought I'm not going to spend the time with her on her case......she will know soon enough to listen and do what is told and expected from her, it's funny how they are much more willing to listen to someone else. And I bet she will be thinking during BC I should have listen to my MOM, Oh I wait for that LOL :)

[Anna]

Dear Mom,
I do understand how you feel - between the time my daughter signed up as a DEP and the time she left for bootcamp there were several occasions when I wanted to wring her little neck. And I DID know alot of what she was going to encounter because I also went into the Navy years ago right out of high school. BUT she has to do it herself - if her recruiter can't motivate her you will not be able to motivate her especially since you are the parent. Unfortunately she will learn the hard way. My daughter did work out some before she left but I wish she would have worked harded to build up her strength over time. She almost didn't pass her PT. She failed the first test and luckily she found someone who could run with her and help her keep the pace needed to pass. I know it's hard, but sometimes all we can do is sit back and pray it comes to them in time. (Or she may be one of those very lucky ones that will pass without working out ahead of time!!) Also, hindsight being 20/20, my daughter wishes she would have taken the ASVAB over again to get a higher score. There are many rates you can not qualify for if you do not have a high ASVAB!!! And you can tell her to check with her recruiter about that and he can verify it!!! (Since Navy Moms know nothing!!!) lol Peace and good luck Mom!!! Feel free to talk to us here - we can help you maintain your sanity!! (well . . . . maybe not!!!)

[Patti (7/174)]

Yes, I'm afraid she'll fail out of the PT part. I'm not too worried about the ASVAB part of it. Honestly, I'm at my wits end with her and if she fails out, I don't know what I'll do. I can't take her living here as she's too abusive verbally, so this is my only hope *fingers crossed*

[Anna]

Patti,
Will be keeping you in my prayers (and your daughter also!!). I felt like I was on walking on egg shells a few times myself because I felt if I pushed my daughter too much then she would think it wasn't worth the hassle and quit and I didn't want her to do that. You have to have faith and let her find her own way. She won't have to be able to pass the run and all BEFORE she goes to bc. It would make things easier on her but she will either pass everything after she gets there or she will be put back until she does.

[gsdkids (daughter AN)]

Patti and Fleur de lis Mom - hang in there. You can't do this for them. Both of your daughters have to figure out what it they want and how to get there. As much as we want to guide them in the right direction all we can do is lead them to the proper path. It's kind of like leading a horse to water - you can't make them drink. the same holds true for these young ladies. If they are truly motivated they will find that out at BC. Hopefully, they will get there before hand.

Perhaps you need to share some computer time and show them Boot Camp Mom's and other groups on this site. Look up the videos of what to expect at bootcamp, on the ships, how divisions are made up, etc.. This isn't girl scout or church camp-this is the real thing. It will be a long 3 weeks upon arrival before they MAY be given the privilege to make a phone call (nothing is guaranteed nor is the length of the call if they get one).

Keep pushing forward, leading them in the right direction, and talk to their recruiter for assistance. If' it's worth doing it's worth fighting for.

[Patti (7/174)]

I tried telling her about what was on here. She didn't care. She said that "they aren't in the service, they don't know". And I explained that your daughters ARE currently in the Navy...but she doesn't like 3rd party references. I've tried to guide, tried to cajole...her recruiter told her to work out...nothing is working. She is periodically motivated. Right now she seems more interested in texting her friends that have no life, instead of working on forwarding her own.

[Tobianne]

I really wish I could send you my daughters letters saying "I really wish I would have run more" She did work out with the NAvy get fit program at the Y all the time when she was not working. She is having a hard time with her 1.5 mile run now. She hurt her ankle. She needs to realize if she gets into a div, of girls like herself they are going to be IT'd a lot... if I did not say what IT is it is basically punishment. Also if she gets into a Div like my daughters they may look at your dauhgter as the weak link. They work as a team but she may have some other probs, Many of the girls in my girls Div. knew that 5 were not gonna make it. They were not very friendly to them other than what needed. If she has an attitude she will need to leave that at the airport.
My daughter does but has not been one to say anything to the RDC's. She was a section leader and she got yelled at a lot for the girls in her general compartment over mysterious things and she still kept her cool. It is not easy, it is hard you are alone and have to rely on self want and your team of folks you do not know.

If she has not been to MEPS you may still have time, some girls like mine only had 90 days though no the whole year to get ready... Good luck. We are all here to help and when she does go, it is a life savor to have this site. Just do not push it on her she has to want this.

[Tobianne]

Well she can do it now and prepare or fail her PFA before she leaves and have the recruiters up her hinny as my daughter did... well she passed the PFA but as for PT she was lazy and now with 3 wks left in BC she said mom I wish I would have done so much more to prepare.

Let her know its no joke and if she is not ready then she can actually get injured as my girl did. On top of the wholestuding, the more she knows now the better and more stable she will be there. Other than that mom, you can not make her. Been there and done that and I failed miserably.

[Tobianne]

Ha oh and I was you a little over 5 weeks ago read everything, tried to tell her what to "expect" and she would not hear it. She is also 18 Good luck mom. Do not stress, it will make you crazy and she will not enough care!!

She will when she gets there though, and that will make her wish things were different, and the MOM I LOVE and MISS You are all worth it.

[tks4]

I don't know what to say. It could be different at each recruting station. My daughter runs 5 miles with her recruiter and other recruits. Those who cant have to run then walk then run etc. They also lift weights and do different exercises. She keeps a log and is required to workout. She runs with the recruits twice a day. I think it was easier for my daughter because she was already in great shape. She just started working out with her recruiter and things moved fast. Good Luck. Maybe having her talk to other recruits would motivate her. My daughter is in touch with other recruits whith her BC date from different states. She is already calling them her friends.