Questions about getting married after bootcamp....

[SailorsCupcake29]

Hi All!

 

To begin, I’d like to thank you for taking the time to read this and helping to ease some of my concerns. My fiancé left for boot camp December 7^th and is going in the 6 year nuke program. I thought I was clear on how we would handle our situation by getting married after he finishes school, but before he leaves for active duty. But now the more I read the more confused I get. Here are my questions.

 

1. He entered boot camp as an E3, what are the time constraints, restrictions or procedures for marriage once he finishes boot camp? If I could, I’d like to marry him on his graduation day, but I don’t think that’s an option LOL

 

2. I live in California, and am not planning on moving to his base during A school immediately, but I’d like to know what our options would be, should I choose to. Anyone recently go through the moving onto base situation? The only reason I ask “recently” is I’ve been hearing conflicting stories about either the Navy only assisting with moving costs if you were married prior to boot camp or they won’t assist at all because of the economy and want to find out the most up to date info.

 

3. If I was able to move to base housing during his A school would he be able to share the same house with me?

 

4. When he is eventually shipped overseas, how difficult is it for me to go with him and live on base?

 

5. Can you have pets while living on base?

 

Okay, that’s all for now. Let me know if you have any answers/suggestions/advise for me.  

 

Jess

[AllieNJ]

Okay, my BF is an officer so he didn't go through boot camp, but I think I can try and answer your questions based on what I know, plus what I know of other girls experiences. 

 

1. I know that there are some men who after boot camp graduation are "grad and go" which means that they have to be at their new duty station on the monday following graduation.  He should be able to find that out a few weeks before graduation and you can make arrangements for going to the Justice of the Peace.  I know a lot of women wait till they are in A School to get married because they have more freedom and it's easier to make arrangements.

 

2. I'm not really sure.  If  you have a facebook, I would recommend going on "Dear Deployment, I hate you" and ask the ladies on there.  They have answers for everything =)

 

3. Im pretty sure that during A school they have to live in the barracks, so I have no idea if they receive BAH during this time.  I believe that it's also a formality for men under E-4 to have to ask permission to collect BAH.  Again, this might be a better question for the facebook group.

 

4. Not difficult at all.  I mean, you obviously cant go with him on a deployment, but if he gets stationed somewhere like Japan or Korea, thats no problem.  There is some paperwork you have to fill out online, but you'll be able to go with him to any duty station.

 

5. There is some base housing that allows pets and some that does not.  It may increase your time on the wait list to get a home if you have to wait for pet friendly housing, but you don't HAVE to live on base.  Just to make things easier on yourself, if you want to get a dog, I would try to stay away from really big dogs, and away from "dangerous" breeds like rottweilers and pit bulls, because those are the most common restrictions.

 

I hope this helped!   Let me know if you have any other questions =)

[Anti M]

The sailors are told not to marry on PIR weekend. some do, but the timing is tight and you might not get it done.  Google Lake County county clerk for information.

 

1.  He can marry during his A school, but he cannot fly home for a wedding.  You would have to go to him.  Yes, he must submit a chit informing the Navy of his decision to marry.  These are always approved unless you are underage (18).  He might have to go to a class or two, not a bad thing.

 

2.  IF you are married prior to boot camp, and IF his school is long enough (nuke is), the Navy will pay for your move to his location.  If he marries you during school, it is on your own dime.  That's why there is conflicting messages, the length of the school has everything to do with it.

Also, not pertaining to you, but if a Great Lakes wife is reading this, there is at least one case of Live Ashore being denied to a newly married A school sailor.  Problems offbase have repercussions for all the married sailors there.  Should not be a problem down in Goose Creek.  Yet.

 

3.  Student sailors can move in with their spouses after they ask permission. Once he is married, and add you as a dependent and does the correct paperwork, he will receive BAH for you whether you reside together or not.

 

4.  E-3 and below cannot take dependents overseas.  Since he is a nuke, if he completes his program, that will not be an issue.  Dependents going overseas must have "command sponsorship", and pass a simple screening for health issues, debt, and criminal record.  Usually not a problem.  You must be married before he receives his orders, or you aren't going.  He's a nuke, shouldn't be an issue, you have lots of time.

 

5.  Pets vary by location, you can choose to rent "on the economy".  We always did because we had pets and I was raised in Navy housing, didn't want a repeat of the drama of young families in my lap.

 

LOL, my answers are based on a lifetime in the Navy, dependent daughter, wife, and a sailor myself, now retired.  

[Ur angel]

I am also having trouble with same questions...it feels like more people and more answers..seriously i dont know what to do..my boyfriend just left for bootcamp and now my family is trying to make me feel down so i will leave him and get married with some random guy of their choice..Before anything like that happen, I want to get married and be with him forever. At one point, i feel bad because i am doing something that people will call it heartless and different things, to my parents. but I do need to go be with the man of my life.If i stay here anymore, i am sure something big is going to happen and everything is going to be ruined that me and he created..I am so much worried and sad