Advice about getting married!!

[Courtney]

So i am engaged and have been for 6 months now. My fiance is currently in boot camp. My first thing is ive been freaking out about is " what if he doesn't love me when he comes home and is he still gonna love me and want to get married after boot camp and after he heres stories from his instructors and what not?"

 

my second thing is.. i wanted to have a small wedding at the court house and get married before he left for boot camp that way when he got his first orders and what not all the paper work would be done and things would be taken care of but he didnt want to and my parents wouldnt let us because of my financial aid for college. well ive been talking to 2 friends that are both in the navy ( ones been in for almost 2 years and the other just finished boot camp almost 3 weeks ago) well both of them have been telling me that we HAVE to and SHOULD get married before he gets his first set of orders because if he gets his first set of orders and they are over seas and he is NOT married and "single" then they will send him over seas but if he is married that he will stay in the US. is this true? and were already waiting for a year and 6 months to have the wedding but should i talk to him when he is done with boot camp and see about him getting it approved for us to get married while he is in A school? or even on like christmas leave this year at like the court house? The more negative stuff i hear about this the more it freaks me out and worries me that it could take even longer to get married and i dont want to keep waiting and waiting and waiting and then it not happen or whatever.

 

can someone please help me out and answer some of my questions! thank you so much ladies!!

[Countrygirl143]

To the comment about him not loving you, he wouldn't be marrying you if he didn't, and I've been through the same thing. Actually the day he graduated from bootcamp, I didn't even know what to say, and then when we were driving to the hotel with his family afterwards, he reached over and grabbed my hand, and it was like all those days I felt so disconnected and like maybe he would change totally dissappeared. He will love you no matter what even if you can't talk or see each other, he'll still be there thinking about you!

[amberrose]

While my fiance was in boot camp, I wrote him every day.  Yes, I wrote him every day to show my support - however, selfishly, it was my therapy as well.  For the one hour I was able to write all about my day - what was going on - how things were going, how much I loved him and supported his decision for joining the Navy.

You are going to feel a roller coaster of emotions.  I still feel them everyday - and my fiance is currently in A School.  Like you and your fiance, we are planning on getting married well before his orders are expected to be cut.  (Which is an entirely different set of stresses and emotions!)  So!  From my experience, grab a hold of something, because your emotions are going to be taking you for a ride.  He loves you, and if he did not love you, he wouldn't have asked you to marry him.  *hugs*

[samiam1290]

Distance makes the heart grow fonder is really true!! You can always do what we did we elope then had a big wedding a few months latter. I believe that if he gets sent over seas and there e-1 to e-3 you can't go, unless you move yourself. If your already planning on getting married he will get more money because he is married.

[Courtney]

Thank ladies. i cant wait to finally hear from him in his first letter. or even his form letter! i hope he wrote a little note on it for us! and i really hope that he wants to get married while he is in A school and not wait. im totally fine with the whole court house thing and then having a big white wedding when we get the chance.

 

Does anyone know if he can get a Chit and come home during christmas and get married back here at home?

[meagan5220]

I know most A schools have holiday stand down but Idk how it works if they have already started I have heard if they havent reported yet they dont go in but idk abt if they are already started. Angie would probably know or Anti M for sure.

 

Where is his A school? It will be different rules for different schools.

[Courtney]

his schooling will be in Florida. Hes still in BC right now.

[meagan5220]

Pensacola or Corry Station? I would suggest heading over to the the group for that A school and ask them. They would know better what the rules for standdown is for that school and whatnot. My hubby went to Pcola and that is where we got married so if you end up doing it there and have any questions let me know. Ours was a hot mess bc of his MTIs giving him false information and lying to him (yea I consider it lying if they dont tell him something that almost caused us to not get married) lol he got in a lot of trouble and so did his instructors but just let me know :)

[Courtney]

In Pcola is where his schooling is at. and interesting id like to talk to you more about what i should expect about lying and stuff from MTI's and what not! send me a personal message.

[Courtney]

i got my first letter today ladies and the feeling was AMAZING!

he still loves me and he misses me you were all right :)

[amwest0713]

Thats great. I'm glad it was the words you wanted to hear :) I cant wait to get my first letter!! How long did it take you to get it? Did he date it?