My boyfriend left for boot camp on 10/24...I am having a REALLY hard time :(

[Carrie19]

Hi!

My boyfriend just left for boot camp on 10/24, and I am missing him so much!  As soon as I wake up, I remember where he is at and that I won't hear from him in a long time.  I am so used to being in constant communication with each other so this is hitting me really hard.  I miss him so much it hurts!  Getting through the day right now without crying a lot is a pretty big challenge. Not being able to see him or talk to him is difficult.

 

I am so proud and excited for him, but I miss him more than anything!  Does anyone have any advice on how to get through these next 8 weeks?  I am staying really busy with pursuing my career goals, etc. but I feel like a HUGE part of my world has been stripped away.  I wrote him my first letter last night and will send it as soon as I get his address.  Any advice would be helpful!  Thanks!

[flipflops91]

I have to say reading all this is super positive and helpful :) it really is something that is hard to deal with and knowing all the little tricks will definitly help make time go by

[Katy]

My Sailor's PIR was June 3 and while he was in boot camp I, and I'm sure everyone else, went through all the same things...so don't ever feel ridiculous or let someone tell you that you are. Any little thing would make me cry...walking in the bathroom and seeing his shampoo would bring me to tears lol.  Like others have mentioned, letters did help A LOT and I wrote him one every day..and I ended up pretty much stalking the mailman =P  I did the countdowns as well, I used the one on my iTouch and it counts down the days/hours/mins/secs so sometimes I'd look at it for a bit and watch the seconds count down...helped me realize that time really was going by. And although I thought they never would, the days did get easier.

As hard as the experience was, it definitely made us realize how much we care about each other.  Some of the sweetest things my boyfriend has ever said to me were in his boot camp letters. And the second you get to see him again is absolutely priceless and makes everything you went through feel completely worth it =)

I also went to the RTC website almost on a daily basis lol, I don't know if you've looked at it or not but here's the link http://www.bootcamp.navy.mil/index.asp I think I read everything on there =P If you haven't checked it out, they have some good stuff in the "Families" section and it really answered a lot of my questions.  The "Recruits" section also gives you an idea of what kind of stuff they're doing, which made me feel like I wasn't totally in the dark about what he was going through.  RTC also has a Facebook page and they post random pics they've taken on base of recruits and different events--RTC doesn't include the division number, but I noticed that people would comment which one it was if they saw their SR in the pic lol. I found it helpful to look through the pics so I could actually see what kind of stuff they do/go through--some pics are of PT, the classrooms, etc. They also have discussion groups (when you find out his ship/division number) on the page that people have started based on ship/division #s and/or PIR date. 

Sorry if I repeated anything you already knew. Hope you start to feel a little better about everything, I know it's tough. Feel free to message me anytime =)

[Carrie19]

Thanks for the advice!  It all helps SO much! And thanks for the web link...I am going to check it out.  I have been wondering what he is doing there, so that will help! Thanks!

[taytay058]

Heyyy Hun!!

I know exactly how you feel....My boyfriend left Sept 7th and I was a HOTT mess! I had to drive all the way back home (which is 2hrs away) that night after we dropped him off at the hotel. I was hysterically crying the whole way back and when I got back to my apartment, all I can think about was him because he moved in with me the first couple weeks of classes. Just like you, when I woke up, I immediately still cried and wanted to go back to sleep. I felt that way for a good week and a half, but I realized I needed to get back on my feet and continue on with my life.

 

Soooo girl I know how it feels because I just went through it, but after the first couple of weeks, you start getting accustomed to him being gone. I wrote to him everyday starting with the moment I got home and when I finally received his address, I sent him a week's worth of letters. Stay strong! :) He would want you to do the same and trust me, he is hurting just as much as you are. I got my first 30min call from him within the 3rd week and then I got like 2 more calls throughout the whole time he was gone. (He actually had more calls than most people I have heard of)

 

Show him how strong and independent you are <3 He's doing this for your future together. Hold it down for him while he's gone. If he didnt need you before, he DEF needs you now. Stay proud of him and once you get back into a normal routine, the time will go by soo much faster. Sooner than later you will be days away from his graduation like I am :) Keep writing him as much as you can like its a journal to your life because he loves the mail.

[Carrie19]

Thank you SO much!  Reading this has helped a lot.  Knowing other people have gone through it, are going through it, is amazing support!  Thank you!  I can't wait for his first letter and 30 min phone call!

[meaganeric-02/11/11]

Hey Carrie,

My boyfriend just left for bootcamp yesterday, and I know exactly what you're talking about. I couldn't sleep at all last night and I'm having a lot of trouble eating, I'm just not even hungry. I can't wait to see him graduate, but 8 weeks feels like a lifetime right now when I just saw him yesterday morning and I already miss him so much... The only thing that's been helping me is to write him letters, and also definitely reachout to your friends for support. Let me know if it's gotten any easier for you?

 

Meagan

[Carrie19]

Hey Meagan!

I am sorry you are going through a rough time.  I hear you, though.  I had trouble eating and sleeping too.  He is always on my mind.  But, I am here to tell you, it has gotten a bit easier.  :)  The pain of him being gone isn't as strong...it is still there, but it doesnt make you feel like the wind and life have been blown out of you.  There are times I still get that same feeling and miss him more than anything, but it isn't always a constant thing.  He is always on my mind, and I miss him like crazy still.  But, it does get easier.  :)  Message me anytime!  We are in this together! :)

 

Carrie

[CUPCAKE]

Carrie and Meagan, time will fly by so fast. My boyfriend has 29 more days left and the first month went by in a flash. Just write your boyfriend everyday or when your not busy. They LOVE getting mail, it makes their day 1 million times better. Good luck to both of you. If you need anything just message me.

Christina

 

[flipflops91]

hey!

my fiance left last week exactly from today and im still not eating regularly. but it has gotten way better than those first couple days. i was a huge mess, i only got out of bed for work and that was it. after your first week has gone by youll realize that 8 weeks doesnt seem so long and with you writing letters all the time it will feel even faster. after being on this website and reading everyone's thoughts and experiences has seriously helped me feel not so alone...if you ever just need to ask someone a question ask me :) i know im only a week ahead of you but having someone to talk to that is going through the same thing is always helpful!

[meaganeric-02/11/11]

Thank you SO much, Carrie and Christina. This second day without him felt like week, but I talked to his mom on the phone today and she says it will get easier every day. I have already written four letters, and I am just dying to send them. Any idea on when I can expect his first letter? Carrie, have you gotten yours yet??!! I am supposed to find out his address tomorrow or the next day from his recruiter, hopefully he follows through on that...Thanks so much for the support, none of my friends understand what I'm going through, and so it's really helpful to have people that are going through the same things! Keep me updated or message me please! I can use the distractions!

Meagan

[Anti M]

Reality check here, sorry.  I'm not trying to be mean, or to scare you, but this group is not private and you need to start thinking about who reads what about your loved ones.  So I'll talk straight, don't be offended.

They only get to write on Sundays, the guys writing at night are breaking the rules.  If they get caught the entire ship can lose their letter writing privileges.... and yes, some RDCs read these posts! You'd think they would be too busy, but no.  True, the forums are more likely to be read by someone "official", but any group, any post, can be read by anyone.  So if your guy is writing at night, and you have his ship and division and first name in your username.... you just busted him.  

 

I've said this before, if your sailor is doing anything shady, DO NOT PUT IT ONLINE.  Think of this as training for future OPSEC and PERSEC you'll need to observe as a family member.  (operational security, personal security)

[meaganeric-02/11/11]

Anti M,

I'm not really sure what you mean by this, I don't think any one posted personal information, just trying to get support from other girls who are going through the same thing?