Just missing her...

[katrina]

Hi Ladies,

 

I'm relatively new to this site and now I'm wondering if it's help more than hurting. I have cried every day since I joined. I read everything that everyone writes in the few groups that I've joined (Michigan moms, Japan moms, USS Cowpens and this one) and I still can't escape the saddness. I haven't seen my daughter in over a year and I miss her so much it can be paralyzing at times. Don't get me wrong. I am SOOOooo proud of her and I support her decision to serve, in fact she will probably be career and I couldn't be happier, I just want to see her!!

I have a daughter in the Air Force also, she lives in Idaho and seems to deploy regularly to the desert but for some reason I don't go psycho about her. Maybe it's because we talk on a regular basis or something, I'm not sure. But my Navy girl, on the other side of the world, hasnt been home in forever, I just cry when I think of her.

Am I going crazy?

[katrina]

I was thinking about your question about if she/they should talk to the recruiter about it. You may want to talk to him first to see what his/er thoughts are regarding it. If you would like, I can ask my daughter to send her an email or something. She might listen to one of her peers that has been through what she is going through. My daughter, Erin, will be coming home for 10 days before she deploys and I'm sure that she would have plenty of advice for your daughter (Olivia?).

Let me know if you think that this would help.

[Anna]

Katrina,

That is a sad story and I'm sorry your daughter had to go through that!!  My daughter almost got married right out of A school, but fortunately her and the young man broke up before they married.  She is married now but to someone she's known for a couple years.  In fact she just finished her enlistment so is now content to be a Navy wife!!

Do you know what happened to the young man?  As a mom of a sailor son I felt heartbroken to hear that he intentionally flunked out so he could get out.  I wonder if he regretted that decision?

[katrina]

Actually, he was not a shining example of America's best. She was still dutifully waiting for him to come to her and then he dropped off the face of the earth, refusing to answer her calls and such. Still, she held fast to her committment to him and waited for him to come around. Months later (and don't even mention divorce because she would get hostile) one of his friends called her and told her that he was in jail and he needed her to bail him out. She refused. Then his mother called her and yelled at her that she wasn't being a good wife. That's when she finally lost it and told her off, stating that her son was NO kind of husband and they both could kiss her butt. THANK GOD!!! I paid for the divorce myself and luckily, she couldn't wait to change her name back. To muddy the waters, she was 10 days from getting her divorce finalized and she got depolyed to Afghanistan. When she got home, her paperwork had expired and we had to start all over. It was a total PIA but definately worth it.

To answer your question, I don't know if he regrets his decision, but if that is how he viewed his committment to his wife, what kind of soldier Would he have been?  I sure wouldnt want my life depending on him having my back.  It's a blessing that he is out (and probably rotting in a Texas jail!)

[Anna]

Wow Katrina, you are right - it sounds like we are all better he decided to get out!!  I am so proud of your daughter for standing up and saying no to bailing him out.  And to his mom!!  Thank you for sharing - - hopefully it will save another young lady from jumping in too soon!!

[Marcia Shea's Mom(Ship3, Div367)]

Oh Sweetie, you have touched my heart. I will pray God's peace for you. I recently arrived in Chicago my daughter aol graduation boot camp tomorrow.

[christmas2006]

hi just missing her, your not going crazy at all. our daughter is gonna be a lifer, i lost track of how long she's all ready been in there,i have a problem as to why i can't remember things,she is out the county, and has been for 3 year ,  her next tour is out of the country, and i haven't heard from her in over 3 months , i haven't seen her in over a year. but we're so proud of her. she is a whole world to elplore before she settles down, and she's an expert at everything she does, she takes after her papa, he has 26 years of military behind him. we are a military family. i cry all the time, its okay to cry and miss her, i think  of all the times we had together while she was mine, growing up, she belongs to the world now. but a part of her is still my little girl. i hope this helps you, i'll bet she's doing the same thing you are, on her down time .

[katrina]

I wish them, and you, the very best. Time will tell, and every set of circumstances is different.

[Anna]

Kathyf,

Congratulations on the newest arrival.  How wonderful - and appropriate to be born on Veteran's Day!!!

I wish the little family all the best for many, many years!!!!

[Lisa (Olivia Div 09-Ship 331)]

Congratulations on the birth of your grand daughter.  I hope the best for the new family!