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Advice on getting married in San Antonio
I have been with my sailor for a little over 4 years but have been best friends for 6 years. He graduated from boot camp January 13, 2012. He went to A school in San Antonio and is currently waiting to start classes to be a coreman. We have decided we want to get married for many reasons but we want to make sure we get married early enough so I am on his orders. We want to do the courthouse ceremony and do a whole ceremony later at a better time. I am new to the Navy and am not sure how the process works. I know he needs to fill out a chit and get it approved before we get married. Does anyone know how long this process of approval takes? Also how far in advance do we need to get married so I will definitely be on his orders? Any information concerning this process would be greatly appreciated!
Views: 214
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by motherinlawtobe on
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#1 - wait until he is Phase III - I think that is where they can request overnight stay. #2 - military can waive the wait period and the counseling required by the state of texas BUT you will have to have a copy of his drivers license and military ID and a form that you can get online for him to complete and have notarized on base
(tell him to go to the UPS store to have this done and have it stamped - they don't take them if they are handwritten). You can take the form, the copies of his ID to the courthouse and get your marriage license (without him being with you). Go to www.Bexar.org (I think that is the website for Bexar County) and scroll down to marriage license forms - it will give you all you need. The court house close at 5 and you can't count on them getting liberty before then, so get the forms so you can get the license. #3 My daughter and her sailor retained a local minister who was amazing and walked us through everything. They got married at the Japanese Tea Gardens, you don't have to reserve them and you don't have to pay for them, it's first come first serve and it was beautiful! #4 - once you are married, he will have to have a certified copy of the marriage license (which you can take to the courthouse yourself and get - and make sure you get 2 certified copies along with the original - the original is beautiful and you will want to frame it), a copy of your drivers license and your social security card so that he can add you on DEERS and change his status to married. It takes a few weeks for your BAH to kick in but while he is there he will start receiving his BAH and separation pay as long as you are living separately. I will be happy to supply the name of the minister if you would like. As long as you get married before the orders come down and he has time to ADD you to DEERS, you will be on th orders. Have him ask his CPO - some people were told to request a chit and some were told to just go ahead and do it. My son in law was told to go ahead and get married. Do the paperwork afterward - every one who requested a chit to get married, were approved. Easier in SA than anywhere else and they are the only state that allows you to get married and get your marriage license by proxy! We went through all this in May, so hope this helps! If you have more questions, let me know! -
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Permalink Reply by Navy2950 on
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Thank you so much for all this information! It has helped me more than you know. I have all the paper work ready for this coming weekend. I was wondering if you could the number of the local minister and information concerning where the japanese tea gardens are and anything else I need to know. Thanks again you have made this whole process so much easier on me than trying to figure it all out myself!
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Permalink Reply by emmypiper on
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after i posted a reply I realized who you were! If you need any help, let me know! even if its as tiny of making a bouquet, "borrowing" something, or giving you two a ride where you need to go/from the airport. My hubby and I actually were by the tea garden today and its beautiful!
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Permalink Reply by Anti M on
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One of them? Are they both active duty? Or do you mean a couple couples?
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Both our husbands are active duty, have not been issued orders yet, they picked today but they havent been drawn up. Im going to be on my husbands orders, as should she because they havent been issued yet. If the sailor has orders already, he can ask for his wife to be added to them. If they are in the states, usually it will be accepted. If he is E3 and below with international orders, he will not be allowed to take a dependent at all.
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If they have verbal orders, they might get the new spouse on them. The Navy won't add a spouse if the orders have been cut. Maybe you've seen a few get added on, but I rarely have seen it, especially if they wait until after school to marry.
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No orders have been drawn up officially yet. We are married to Corpsman and they get to pick where they go after A school. Thats all they did today, they get issued orders in a few weeks.
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Permalink Reply by meagan5220 on
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Someone please correct me if I am wrong but I was told NEVER to EVER make a copy of a military ID except for medical insurance purposes, and that will only need to be done for the spouse. I was told its a federal offense to have a copy made of it. I tried to read up on it because I had a friend that works at an apt complex and she asked me about it because her boss wanted her to get a copy of someone's military ID and from what I could find you are not allowed to be making copies of it. IDK how much they crack down on that and whatnot but just thought I would throw that out there and get some clarification.
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If it's for an apartment complex or for a job, they cannot legally require a copy of your military ID. AT ALL. That has so much personal information on it. However, I had to make a copy of my husbands for the court when he put in a waver to be present when we got our marriage license, but that was destroyed and not kept on file. That's the only case I know of because it was a legal proceeding.
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I see. I just know I was told by someone in Pass and ID NEVER EVER EVER should anyone ever need a copy of your so's military ID. You can get a letter, POA, Orders, something else to prove he is military but making a copy of its illegal so I was told never to do it no matter the case, even if its destroyed the guy told me its illegal. so Idk Anti M any input? *wish I could tag people like on facebook* lol
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The main concern of the Navy/DoD is not so much loss of your personal information, but counterfeited IDs. As for illegal, I've never seen the federal regulation, but then, I haven't looked for it. But hubby agrees, that ID card never should be copied. I've had the hospital copy mine, but I always bitch at them about it. They should know who I am by now, I've had enough major procedures!
For employment or an apartment, they can look at your 1173, but only let them copy your driver's license or state ID.
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thanks for the clarification. I never have let them copy his. but we have never been asked for it and given no other options, as soon as we say no they ask for another form of ID. I looked into copying mine bc the place I was getting some tests ran needed it. My ID no longer has his social on it. But when I asked my Dad (former Army) he said for medical puproses I should be fine. TY again Anti M. I didn't know if it was actually illegal but the Pass guy was soo serious so I just stick by it lol. Plus I dont think anyone needs a copy of it anyways.
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