New Navy Girlfriend¡ Pro or Con

[bittersweet914]

Hi everyone,

My boyfriend of 2 1/2 years rec,ently joined the navy. He is due to leave for boot camp October 29th 2012, but his recruiter put in a request for him to leave early which is very stressful because everytime his phone rings I'm on edge thinking that is the call that will instant take him from me. His occupation is an ABE Aviation Boatsmate Equipment. I'm looking forward to this long emotional rollercoaster ride and I'm seeking friends with the same emotions to assist me with getting through it. Does being a Navy girlfriend have more Pros or Cons?

[AshleyVirginia]

My boyfriend & I have been together for a year and a half and he's been in the Navy the entire time. At first it wasn't too different from any other relationship. He was in nuke school & had long hours at school, but I lived 20 minutes away and we were together almost every night. Then he graduated & got stationed in Norfolk, which is 7 hours from me, and going from seeing each other constantly to going through month long underways & only seeing each other once, maybe twice, a month was hard. But nothing compared to saying goodbye to him last week when he deployed.

I think it's hard to look at any military relationship as pros vs. cons. I will say that while it's hard to remember it at times, all the separation and hard stuff can be valuable. Weak relationships get weaker, strong ones get stronger. I'm counting down the days until deployment is over already, but I know that if we can get through this we can get through anything.

And I kind of know what you mean with the phone call thing. Towards the end of prototype when my boyfriend was waiting to get his orders, I felt sick with worry that he would be sent to Japan. I can still remember everything that was going on when he got the phone call saying he was going to Japan. Luckily, that fell through and he ended up much closer tho

[bittersweet914]

Japan?? That was one large bullet dodged... We are pretty strong, but I, pray that we get stronger like you stated. He read your comment said that you gave him hope...thanks!! I beieve that you and your guy will continue to excel in your relationship. Thank you for your kind words.

[bittersweet914]

Please keep me informed on how everything is going with bootcamp. I pray that you have the strength and courage to get through this period without him. If you need to here some words of encouragement I am here.

[nightingale cvn72]

Personal opinion; ask him to tell his recruiter to take him off the call list. It drove me nuts for months before I finally said enough was enough. They called my husband four times to try to get him to go early, one was right before thanksgiving and the only one we said no to, the others he got ready to go and they said never mind lol. On the pros and cons, I thought I would hate this life but its not as bad as it seems. Boot camp and Aschool were completely miserable though. Once he was out of the training stage things weren't so bad. It definitely helped me become more independent. It also showed me true friends. Its amazing how many people disappear when things get tough, and how many women in the same situation are willing to help you. Even if he's not in for a career its a good start. And I think I read that you two were planning on getting married, if you are I suggest you do it before he goes to bc. The recruiters don't want to do the paperwork but its a horrid paid to try after he's in. Hope I helped a little :)

[BrandonsGf]

My boyfriend graduates next week and i have to say its made me a lot stronger personally. Going from living with him to having hardly any communication with him (ive gotten one phone call and 3 letters in the past 7 weeks) I have definintly had to do do some serious adjusting but mostly i had to change how i looked at it. I spent the first two weeks crying everytime nebody mentioned him and feeling like he was being taken away from me. And then i would see my friends with there bfs and it made me feel alone but now i understand that he is just at work and will be home when hes done working. I cant say if there are more pros or cons but from my experience focusing more on the pros and being understanding of the cons helps makes this easier. And it makes it harder on ur SR to focus on bootcamp if he is worried about how your holding up. Be strong it gets easier!

 

[bittersweet914]

Thank you BrandonGF. I no that I am going. to cry and from hearing everyone stories I no that it is perfectly normal. I have been trying my hardest to remain strong in front of him because him worrying about me is the last thing I want him to think about. How was the graduation? Was it hard to spot him out of ?the thousands of soldiers? I'm ecstatic to attend his PIR. And send your boyfriend my congrats.

[Sarah.JKO]

I am a navy wife, and my sailor leaves for basic in early Nov. I am very excited to go threw this while journey with him.
He is going to be a nuke tech:)
I am pretty new to this life style as well, but this site is veeeeeery informative:)
To me there are lots of pro's, but the con's seem to be the most noticed. Like being away from each other for long periods of time, lots of stress while they are in school, or deployed.
I Rly think it is what you make of it though:)))))

[bittersweet914]

Sarah, I have to say I agree. I have learned so much from this site and his recruiter. Keep me posted on your sailors due date since mines leaves the end of october

[Ashley-PO2 Spouse]

I'm sorry you guys are dealing with that. Long distane dating is really hard. My husband and I met in the military and we dated long distance for a year. We decided to go ahead and get married, but we still ended up seperated for over 2 1/2 years because we were both in. When my second set of orders where still away form him, I decided to get out. It's a hard life. I applaud all of you for sticking with it.

Personally, I think the girlfriend stage kinda sucked. Once I was married, it seemed a lot easier.

[Anti M]

Same story for me, apart for two years, couldn't get orders together, so I got out.   Darn hard at nine years, I was up for chief!  

[bittersweet914]

Oh wow, thank you for your time served :-)

[bittersweet914]

I hear that alot, its better when you're a wife ve.. ses a girlfriend. We have been discussing marriage, but we want to be sure that the timing is right. Thank you for serving our country and now supporting us wives, girlfriends, etcc